You know something is amiss when you wake up wondering what you've done to screw up your life. "Oh, geez, what did I do now?!"
It must be chronic depression; a battle and a mind game. Don't believe what you tell yourself, unless it is good. Don't believe the bad stuff or you never get a breather.
Oh well. I'll go to the Thursday open mic, even though I don't care for it much; bad sound, they charge a fortune for coffee, food, and even water isn't provided.
I'll bootleg my own water and coffee.