What Luck, a stranger wants to know me better

My journalspace ( the new one) blog remains pretty much dormant. I opened one there but do all my writing here.

Imagine how my heart lept when I received this lovely message from the lovely, articulate Doris:

Journalspace.com Blogs to me
show details 2:57 AM (19 hours ago)

Reply

Doris sent you a new message:

"

My dearest;
And your health which is the most important;
my regards to your family and friends over there.
My name is Doris Zarki. I was impressed to invite for a private discussion after my intensive search for a trusted and honest many.I will like to demand your trustee and sincerity as a friend;a long-term loving relationship from you.Also know more about you,your country and culture,i will also like to seek your advice too.i think we can help each other.I will send you my details with my pictures after you have replied to my email.(zarkiidoris@yahoo.com )
I look forward to hearing from you.
Have a nice day.
Love from Doris

Must be my lucky day. I can tell she's hot and head over heels infatuated with me. Feel free to email her yourself, and of course ask for her pictures. I know we have a mental connection so strong that I needn't bother with the email.
"

Tennis Tip #1 and PC tips and else

First let me say that "special needs" does not mean that A. can't hit a forehand ground stroke at maybe 150 MPH straight at your feet. Needs to get whupped is what I say. Special needs, schmecial shneeds is what I say; this is war. Really, that kid just keeps getting better. His power shot used to just go out of bounds, providing you got your head out of the way. Now it is actually a thing of beauty. Special whatever does not mean one has no athleticism or grace. I've grown rather fond of him and his partner in running me ragged.

On to the helpful hint. It is highly possible that one of A's fast moving deep line drives might bounce just where you expect and you may be perfectly positioned to get the racket in front of it so that it will be sent back over the net. That is my number one goal; get it over the stupid net. My number 2 goal is for it to land inside the lines once it makes it over the net. That's it. Easy peazy.

OK. So, there you are, just where you think you should be, all set to finally return that runny nosed kid's rocket shot. Beware such apparent good fortune. A may have somehow put the most bizarre spin ever on the ball such that it bounces then turns so that instead of continuing in the original direction it makes a bee line over toward your chest. Since you were so smugly positioned just right you assume you can plant your feet and rest them there.

What can happen is that your feet now become clay as you beg them to move the rest of you to the left so you can hit the ball. As you stumble about while trying to swing the racket to hit the ball, you can smack yourself smartly in the face. Once you do this, recovering dignity is not easy task.

The best I could do, after ascertaining that my glasses hadn't broken and that I wasn't bleeding, was to declare that this was a warning; "OK. You've seen what I can do to myself with this racket, just think what I could do to you!!"

The moral of the story is, either refuse to play against A and T, or be prepared to get out of the way. Whatever you do, if the cause is obviously lost, do not hang on to the idea so long that you smack yourself in the face. Self flagellation with the racket is not considered good form in any tennis venue where polite or semi-polite company is to be found. People will, however, give you a wide berth, if that's your goal.

--------------------------------
If you have a PC and you go to open a page on the net, and all of a sudden official looking pop ups claiming to be microsoft or someone tell you it is urgent you click here to run a spy sweeper because you are being invaded by trojan this or that, don't do it. A friend got caught off guard and this resulted in big trouble. Getting the computer straightened out involved loss of data and a long phone call with Gandhi. McAfee didn't do any good in this case. Apparently there are fake spyware things out there as well that offer free goods but they are just trouble. I believe one is called spy something 360.

It makes me feel better about deciding to get a mac for the Tour.
------------------
This is long enough so else should be a short bit of babbling. Nerve, clear objective, and the target of affection are things I want to bring into my life at this juncture. I believe it is all possible. The idea of parallel universes makes sense to me so I'm one who can believe most anything that holds promise of a bright future. The realm of possibilities is not finite, or at least so vast that for all practical purposes it may as well be considered limitless. But none of these is likely to be found looking at the realm of limited things that lead nowhere. That's today's pep talk to self.

Light at End of Whatever is Not Train Heading This Way

It's the whatever that is the question, not so much the light at the end of it. This job which was bid for X dollars, based on N hours of work at W dollars per hour, plus E dollars of expenses, became something of a walk over the edge. An adventure into the recesses of the mind; that region where fact and fiction, need, desire, and compulsion all blend into kaleidoscopic field of decorative confusion.

So, the formula was N x W + E = X.

X is the constant here. I made a deal; X dollars for this job. What we found when we reached the light at the end, which illuminated the final formula, was this: (Nx3)x(W/3)+E=X. Sure you can reduce it down to the same thing, but we are talking 3 times the hours and one third the wage. It makes no difference to X.

You can see how pain and suffering can be buried in statistics. The bottom line comes out the same. Be very productive for decent wages or obsessive compulsive, and therefore slow, for slave wages. The end result is the same.

Lots of people would actually pay someone a lower wage for lots of hours than a higher wage for much fewer hours, even when the end result is the same. They feel better if whomever they pay suffers. Those people may be sadists. They are without a doubt idiots. They are also in the majority.

Don't deny it. I know at least two out of the three people reading this fall into that camp. I mean idiot in the most complimentary possible sense. And sadist in the most benign of contexts.

In my case the sadistic idiotic boss turned out to be me. Obviously, I was probably suffering the aftermath of some sort of dimensional anomaly. It wouldn't be the first time. Things are more complex than your basic big bang theory.

All that and I still finished the famous Project J. As much as it can be competed for now. I'll go back sometime and go ovr the thirsty wood again, but that should be about it. This stuff may or may not even be teak. Every piece of wod is very different from the other. It ranges in color as do humans, from black to red to yellow to white to brown. You can't tell how it will be until the oil is applied. Either the jefe will like it or not. If not there is still now way to complain about the work. If you don't like the variance, talk to the sneaky Philippines manufacturer.

If you are buying beware the same manufacturer. They use stain which makes it appear that you have a more natural thing than you do. It masks places where they repaired splits with glue, filled holes, etc. Very sneaky.

Who cares? What I have been doing became insane. I would just stare at it wondering what could make it better, why I was there, and did it look great or horrible---I really can't tell the difference at this point. That's just sad. It is part of my nature though. I'll think everyone but me knows, until much later.

At that time my view will emerge, fostering resentment on my part, should I believe the wrong view now. If someone says it is good, and later I am sure it is bad, I'll feel betrayed. Same with other way around.

I know I do good work. There are instances in which the result belies the process. This may be such a case, or it may be otherwise. I simply don't know at this moment.

Almost

Almost done with my art teak project, code name project J, or Monty Python's flying courtyard. I'll have to get at least some photographic evidence. I think I do have some before video on my Flip. It's one of those things that may or may not show up on film (or what ever) as it really is. The difference shocks even me.

Some of this stuff could easily have been dumped to the curb and people would have passed it by. You'd not have known it was worth saving or that if you did it would be at all attractive. So, as it turns out, it was worth saving and it looks splendid. I've learned a lot about something I amy or may not ever again encounter. That is once project O is finished. Lots to do there, but the nature and quality is different. O's stuff leaves no question that it is worthwhile.

One thing is certain, this project J person got more out of me than I estimated. It was my choice to spend more time and go to a little more trouble than at first I planned. That is my downfall; I get lost in the spirit of the thing rather than think how I am minimizing my hourly reward rather than maximizing it.

There are times, on other jobs when I've maximized the returned for the time put in, but not always. In this case, it was worth it to me to do things I had not planned and to experiment and learn.

The real test will come when the hotshots are back in town. He has a rep for being a little tough to deal with. There is no way he could be justified doing any less than nominating me for the Nobel Teak prize. Feedback from others has been good. You never know with the mega wealthy. It is a different world from even the rather wealthy. I tend to like something about that world though, the little I know of it. These people work and do things intelligently. I do not resent their wealth. I appreciate it. They pay my rent. Wealthy people leave a wake of jobs behind them, directly and indirectly.

I may end up somewhat wealthy, if it remains legal to do so long enough. Or I may remain hand to mouth, day by day and month by month. Teak reconditioning is not likely to make me rich, unless I write a book. Maybe The Teak Diaries, a la Motorcycle diaries by the most adored psychopath of our times.

Must be that there is some Zen Buddhist Monk in me. I know I should be concerned about the future and retirement, health care, and of course The Planet, but I find I can ignore all those things and be pleasantly satisfied thinking only short term as I try to make art out of patio furniture. That is one strange thing. Even so, as I commune with the flowers and trees and sandpaper, I do wonder about many things I refuse to define here.

Yea, But It's a Dry Heat

That is a phrase I learned since embarking on the Tour west. It often applies to the justification for inhabiting the desert. There seem to be all kinds of variations when it comes to desert. I haven't learned all of it. I know I am not far from there, but this is not the desert. It is technically in the middle of national forest. The trees are just extremely short. Shorter than the rocks and boulders in most, but not all, cases.

I worry about mentioning record breaking heat because those so inclined may decide this is the result of evil humans inhabiting the planet and building machines. I'm not in that camp. I think the evil humans are only responsible for record breaking cold temperatures when they occur. And for record breaking snowfall. That is all the fault of those arrogant interlopers who just landed on the planet and decided they had a right to make it their home.

Until recently the love and blind adoration for earth was hardly mentioned. Once they got organized all they wanted to do was have sex and beg for a good growing season and kids who weren't idiots. The good old days...

Fortunately much of the time today involved the teak cleaning and brightening process which requires that you spray the stuff with water, a lot. That may have kept things cooler. It was breezy enough anyway. The temp was at least 95F. It was the one time I checked what my car had to say, and it was in the shade.

I think when people have enough money they can bribe the weather gods and get little concessions like a pleasant breeze. Another of the reasons I like the environment in which I do this menial, maniacal, obsessive compulsive project. It's like boot camp, preparing me for things to come, and getting me back in the mood to attack life, one the menial level or for a billion dollars. Most likely my attack will remain in the low few figure range, but I see no reason to rule out possibility.

Project J appears almost done. It's a friggin work of art. There is still the chance I may be the only one who knows that although I was told in spanish by a housekeeper that my work is is very beautiful. I think that's what we were discussing. It was amiable at any rate, and I conversed without hemming and hawing. I surprised myself. No sentences like, "Si, el worko is mucho and los teakos no hay la easy".

Ideas are still cooking. I'd like to see if I can get some of the things rolling when I can get the time. It's a three or four pronged attack, with none of the prongs closely related.

You have no idea how hard it is not to comment on the recent conference with Obama, Hugo, and Larry Curly and Moe. Among other things in the zany world of hope and change.

Teak Tip # X(y+2)420 and Artistic Happiness

If you find that the wood is sort of split with gaps in places you can't glue with clear epoxy and clamp together, so you settle for sort of filling them in, take some wood glue, squirt some into the crack (sounds racy but this is technical) get some sanding dust from the same project--empty out the dust bag from the sander--- squirt some more glue on the discarded cardboard container that once held the sand paper, mix in some dust, tear a strip of that cardboard off to use as a paddle to mix it up into a fairly thick paste.

Then take that and work it into the crevice being healed. The one you already put some glue in. Keep adding and working it in with the cardboard stick you tore off earlier. It has a glossy finish which helps. Keep doing that, using the finesse and touch which comes from experience and years of sobriety, until you have built up the surface so that the actual crack is no longer visible.

Later you can sand it down and curse the fact that it doesn't look exactly like the other wood around it. It's better than the alternative, and if you were going to paint it, no one would know. If you are going to do teak oil, you can sand it in such a way that it just looks like some weirdness in the wood. It will be marvelous and you'll be glad you did it.

Otherwise you risk clothing or body parts catching on the errant splitting pieces of wood. It could result in gigantic splinters greeting the other side of your belly, instead of the warm caress most teak sitters crave.

----------------------------------------------------

Is it just me or does there seem to be a dearth of humor in modern society lately? I don't completely mean the jokester stuff but just a general cheerfulness. The carefree art and such of happier times is tougher to come by. It could just be me.

The TV comedians have taken to tired political jokes, almost as if they all have the same writers. I mentioned that before. But they aren't funny. Most radio talk is devoid of much cheer. Of course that is understandable given the subject matter.

Somehow it used to be that one could lampoon politics and make it funny, even if you disagreed with the underlying sentiment. I think there is one exception; Dennis Miller of all people. I've caught his radio show a few times lately, parts of it anyway, and he seems to have the ability to make a point and not lose the humor. I was always kind of lukewarm about Dennis but now I find myself becoming a fan. Dennis and the Padres. What's next?

Anyway, I keep hoping for an artistic revolution of sorts. Sort of like a modern day Peter Max, but not a knock off, some direction we never considered.

I may be imagining all this. How does one know when he is delusional? Lots of people find their thrills in video games, but that seems a little lacking in humanity, and other than the skills acquired manipulating the gadget, the games appear to lack redeeming values of any kind. Maybe it is fun. But it misses the mark on what I think is due. These are the times which are ripe for a cultural revolution and twist of thinking. It is hard to explain what I am thinking but I am thinking something.

Now I'm A Baseball Fan

On the way home from work, I've been catching the end of ball games on the radio. It appears San Diego Padres are off to a great start. Isn't a Padre a Catholic priest? I knew Cubans could play baseball and box, but I never thought about priests being good players. Not sure what this has to do with Cubans. The mind is a many splintered thing.

Whatever the deal, I guess the Padres from this town can play. Maybe it is because their social life is limited. I know, the limited social life of a priest is a dubious stereotype. What do I know? I've only met a few priests. Most were witty characters. One was pure evil, and that's that. That was the one at immigration hearings, years ago in Miami, who wanted all the federal money sent down there for immigrants to go through him. Long story but the guy had nerve. He gave me the creeps like I've never experienced just from being in proximity to someone.

It does seem that everyone likes this city a lot. Some places are like that.

Latest road merchandise, let's see, a drive shaft, of course a ladder, landscape bags (?)--must be bags of dirt--seems like something else that would be useful but I can't remember it. Maybe it was a stove or something like that. Other than that all I have to report is a rash of people driving into buildings. Someone drove into the dentist's office, another crashed into a restaurant, and some else drove into some kind of business. It must be all the rage.

OK. No days off until I'm done with project J. If project O was free of people this week I would include it, too. They are likely to be in the way for a week or two so I guess I'll have to take time off when J is complete. I love the environment there. It is like going to work in the Garden of Eden every day. I'm one of the few workers there for which Spanish is not the first language.

They are hurting for cash in this state. As the rhetoric has increased on the subject, I noticed the prevalence of speed traps has too. I heard the city actually shortened the yellow lights so the cameras would catch more people, bring in more money. I believe they got caught and some group nailed them in court. The cams are a money loser and prevent no accidents. Nice piece of technology though, if you only consider intrinsic value and not what it is for.

Contempt Prior to Investigation

I forget who the guy was that listed that as a principle which is guaranteed to result in everlasting ignorance. A corollary to that would be acceptance prior to investigation. Many cases of contempt and acceptance prior to investigation are flooding the culture these days. Most of it is on purpose, and people, being human and not wanting to be odd man out spotlighted for ridicule, go along.

Have you noticed how mainstream comedians and people like Letterman pick up the political ball lately? He's become unwatchable, but I catch bits here and there that all sound as if scripted by the same hack. One example was when Rom said Rush Limbaugh was the new face of the Republican Party, implying that he pretty much called the shots.

I find Rush a bit hard to take due to the back patting ego, but I do not find him mean or hateful as portrayed. Letterman and others took the hint and went to town trying to label him the same way Rom did. I'm no fan of either party because both got us to this place, hitting from different angles but heading to the same place. But I have listened enough to know that it was a purposeful bit of propaganda to say he is the face of the party.

Rev. Wright is not the face of the Democratic party. All these personalities get in the way of the truth. I've never seen this country so blindly splintered. I know people who absolutely go hostile at the mention of a Republican. Usually critics I know just shake their heads when someone is outed as a democrat. In today's environment, it is far safer to be a dem. It is less safe than ever to be a Libertarian or leaning that way. They got you on a list with terrorists. I blame republicans and democrats for that.

Back when the 911 report came out I could see both parties hard at work setting up things to undermine individual sovereignty, and of course by-passing state and local authority. To hell with any steenkeeng constitution. The whole purpose of that is to limit power of government.

The phrase "a nation of laws" was originally meant a government limited in scope by laws. Lines drawn to keep it in check. That flipflopped so that now "a nation of laws" means a nation with so many damned laws that a person can't sneeze without breaking one. The people are now limited and the ones who have to have permission to act. The plan was to have a government that needed permission.

Anyway. I've seen very blatant examples of dissent being twisted, mis-reported and painted as insanity lately. Further investigation paints another picture. People accept much of what is being done economically because we are told it is OK, and there are crises to avert. Maybe yes, maybe no. Investigation and following the dominos back to the point when they were all standing is not easy, but yields another view.

So many statistics get spouted without evidence or source. Often when the true numbers are obtainable, they vary greatly from those quoted by our elected officials and their sales puppets in the news. The actual influence of US guns in Mexico is one example. Apparently they've inflated that for some reason to become clear soon. It sounds like an excuse to once again inconvenience non-trouble makers.

I have to say, as one who is loathe to apologize for being a citizen or for much else internationally, I am a bit put off that Obama is taking the blame for Mexico's problems and those of the rest of the world, on behalf of the US. It is a bit laughable to be claiming we are arrogant with a great many Brits and French in the crowd. But even when I was furious at Bush, that bit about being ashamed to be American, and the guilt I was supposed to feel toward the gold diggers overseas never quite touched me.

I'm beyond the point of being mad at Obama or Bush or even Hilary. It's too sad. I'm wondering if some of the fiction I read was actually a vision sent by God. The people and events are jumping off of Orwell's, Huxley's and Rand's pages.

They can do or say what they like, and the people can find their religion in some unknown goal of the state (there are definitely religious overtones in all the mischief), as long as I have duct tape, WD-40, channel locks and my lucky Leatherman tool, I'm ahead of the game.

My first instinct many years ago about Arnold was correct. He is an ego maniac and a nincompoop. One of those people just smart enough to get by but not bright enough to know he is not that bright. He absolutely does not get it. For awhile I thought he understood the USA. Clearly he doesn't. He understands fascism and thinks it is OK because he considers his brand benevolent.

Who would have guessed that we'd come to a point at which "the Rich" are considered greedy devils, and the best security is not to own anything? OK. Maybe some us did guess it. Still, I really never believed they'd be compiling lists of enemies based not on substantial history but on whether you disagree with those in power. !!Bien Venidos a Habana!!

Spirit of the Tour

It seems advisable to keep up with what's happening on the totalitarian front, but letting it mess with you too much is not the best approach. Real life is largely conducted apart from the life I see on the news that supposedly includes me or people I know.

This present assault on the culture of freedom has been coming for a long time, and I was aware of it so I'm not surprised. It is not encouraging but I know I will never ultimately go along. Every day it is easy to read Big Brother between the lines; always in the name of fighting drug cartels, illegal immigration or terrorists. In the case of drugs and illegals, the target of the measures gets missed. In all cases, people doing nothing wrong, minding their own business are increasingly the real target. Minor inconvenience and sacrifices of privacy are adding up rapidly.

That is what was cool about the Tour from the start. I was shot out into the unknown without any official anything. Oblivious to all but the experience for much of the time. It gave me a much greater appreciation for this country. There are a million very cool spots. The whole thing pulled me out of a pit I wasn't enjoying. Sometimes a wave of that enthusiasm and willingness to face the unknown washes over me.

It still feels like I am in the process of the Tour. I am, actually. Even though I'm in a place and doing things here, it hasn't lost the charm of feeling like a journey. I think that is what life is supposed to be, and lots of people have a handle on that from the start. Pity that I was waylaid a long time ago, and that the result was a bit less than storybook bliss, but letting that overshadow successful progress toward a change of everything makes no sense. I like the changes and direction of things. My mind occasionally rebels against the new and better, wanting to find comfort in the old hopeless place of defeated spirits. Forget that.

Things take awhile. Old habits and patterns don't just go away because the geography changes. This is an exercise in a type of discipline and perseverance. I know what that means in case it doesn't make sense to anyone else. When I am able to see the contrast between before and after, I am happy. The only way I know how to describe the main thing that makes it possible is to call it faith. Faith in what I can't or won't describe, except to say it is often blind faith. This is the right thing, and it will be OK. That's how it goes.

Whether by design or just because, it does seem like the media bombards the airwaves with things that would fuel anyone's discouragement. Way back when I used to say that the news is the government's sales force. Now I see that is being proven more than ever. They are also the sales force of pessimistic self appraisal and fatalistic view of the future.

It probably is not so bad for government workers, but anyone with a spirit of independent freedom is going to be discouraged by the volume of official complications and nonsense. I have enough of that from the detractor voice inside my mind. No need to feed it with the daily butchering of history, truth, and all that I hold holy, doled out by government's and their salesmen twenty fours hours a day.

Something addictive about it. Where do they get these news people? Are those TV anchors aware that they are like human cartoons? I think many viewers believe they are sincere and real. Maybe they just stare is disbelief like I do.

The Tour is the best defense. If I can treat this phase like the on the road part, then life will be OK. It makes me long for a road trip. Maybe I'll run up the coast if conditions permit sometime in the summer. I've got the tent and all that stuff. Plus I have places and people I might be able to see.

That is the one thing that bugs be about the police staters and cap and trade socialists; they are dead set on killing mobility. Maybe I'll end up with a bike and one of those little trailers. I can't picture myself in a bike get up though. Tights are an affront to the public on some people.

The Gods May Not Be Crazy but La Gente, hay un cosa loca

My Spanish is perfect. Anyone who speaks espanol and finds it otherwise is merely the victim of some popular dialect. So many things have been broadcast over the airways and written in news reports lately which I find utterly astounding, where would one begin to separate truth from fiction; right from wrong; sane from insane.

One thing for sure, misinformation and dishonest propaganda has swept the nation and the world like the British Invasion swept music in the 60's. It's everywhere and popular to the point of mass hysteria. Except it is not fun and upbeat like the early Beatles. Fun and upbeat is what is lacking these days. I am always fun and upbeat, but I may be nuts, so that may not count. Until now, I never considered myself a pathological liar. Well, that can be fun and upbeat if done with a high level of artistic integrity.

I'll try to get some stuff done at project O, as it pays as I go. However I am taking no days off until project J is complete because I'll at least get paid sooner and because I only have 2 weeks. At that time I am going to a southern Druid retreat located on a golf course. I will be erecting an alter to the god of the forest. It will look much like a patio or deck.

No telling what else will unfold on that adventure. I bet Homeland Security will be watching since southern druids are considered a potential security threat. They haven't actually done any violence or threatening mischief--YET. But HS thinks they could. It could happen. A bunch of neo southern druids in hoodies, like gangstas, could confuse people who don't know they aren't really a gang. They might hold mass fertility rites and upset the balance.

I think they should watch squirrels. I've noticed that in many areas they have become more brazen, and although they haven't organized and attacked people en masse, they could. It could happen. Better safe than sorry.

How did we ever survive before Homeland Security came on the scene? You may say they are there to protect against foreign fanatics on a mission from the peace be upon him guy, but they gave that up long ago. They figured out that the potential for domestic threats is huge. We have something like 350 million potential threats in this country, not counting coyotes, bears and squirrels.

Any one of your neighbors could go berzerk and pose a safety threat at any time. Watch them closely and report any unusual behavior; things like fertility rites in the back yard, independent thought, home remodeling, installing altars or patios.

So, before long I'm going underground. I'll infiltrate their ranks pretending to build the patio-like altar. Then I'll wait until they come show their subversive faces. Depending on various factors I may see about trapping them in some sort of fertility ceremonies. Then after a few such events, or more, I'll spring the trap and let Homeland Security take it from there.