The Tragedy of Dysfunction Passed Down From Generation to Generation

Is it any wonder certain of my clan has abandonment issues? This is tragic. When will the chain be broken? Much as I love my nephew, N1, and his wife, Mrs N1, their obvious neglect of my darling Grand Niece makes me wonder if I shouldn't take action. I may have to take her and raise her myself.

Viewing this shocking photo would surely sway any court.***


***as long as cousin J isn't a member of the jury---she thinks it was right that my lariat rope was confiscated when I was but a child fighting for freedom and justice

Town Review: Ponca City, OK

First of all, and this is very subjective and unscientific, the town has a good vibe. And why not? They have Kaw lake, Ponca lake and The Pioneer Woman museum. I like pioneer wimmins.

Another mind blower is that wifi is free, city wide.

I must confess, I opted for another motel night. 100 degrees at 730, and not much to go on re the campground, and I caved. I'll be better prepared next time.

The check clerk said she and her husband and five kids moved here less than a week ago. The already found a house--400 per month, and I believe that is a mortgage. She was hired on the spot at the second place she asked. Her husband may get on with the refinery, which I assume is the big employer in this area. In her words "they just give away jobs like crazy here". They moved from Witchita.

Her positive attitude and a kind of innocence I can't quite describe combine in a very charming and upbeat impression. But there is something cool about this place.

Before landing at an inn I drove some of the neighborhoods and the parks by the lakes. It is clean and I like these streets and houses. A nice place.

Somewhere up and to the left right is Foraker where my parents grew up and my cowboy grand and great uncles lived. I will go there tomorrow. It is as tiny a town as is possible and still have a name and a dot on detailed maps.

Many of the ancestors who dwelled here in the 19th and 20th centuries were old school cool. One had gone out to the CA gold rush on horseback and returned with more than one notch on his revolver. He was one of us who has the vagabond gene, however he managed to maintain a wife and numerous offspring. I missed that part and I blame it on the Woodstock nation and the "greatest" generation. They filled my head with mush and it took forever to empty out most of the trash.

On the way here a Mexican named Israel, whose 10 year old son spoke much better English, was by the side of the road with a tire off of his explorer and the family milling about. He waved his thumb so I stopped. His spare was on a rim with a different lug pattern and his tire was shot.

Lacking much room, I stuffed things from the passenger seat in crevices here and there to make room, and put the tire in back on top of the cargo cover which is covered by a reflective tarp. It worked. He had a cousin in Oklahoma City who would meet him and they, being mechanics, knew where to get another tire put on. He called cousin X and it was set. I dropped him at I35 and some street with no anglos to be seen.

Israel was ready to pay me, asking how much did he owe me. I never said I was asking a fee so that idea was put away with a "Nada. Adios, y buenos suerte amigo". Or words to that effect. He got the gist of it and I traveled on. I guess the family had provisions, plus his son was a rather competent little butter ball of a boy. Sometimes it is worth finding out how the story will unfold to stop for strangers.

My cousins, J and S, outdid themselves again showing me a great time, introducing me to more distant relatives and making me play harmonica for everyone. I played for aunt, and for my other cousin's daughter, her husband and their kids. Possibly the best looking couple in America. Their kids were 8 and 10 years old. The girl was oldest and the boy was probably younger, if you see my logic. Very fun and nice kids.

Cousin S pulled out some sheet music and I played along. We did very well, I think. Not everyday that you show up to a stranger's house, inform them that you are kin, then give a mini concert and leave. This trip is like that. I gave the little girl my C Lee Oskar harp. She is learning piano and seems to be musical. She found it al amusing and intriguing.

My cousins are a very good influence on me because they keep me from retreating into my usual cocoon of isolation. Very smart people and not strangers to the School of Hard Knocks.

It goes without saying I couldn't get enough of my little grand niece. She told me the meaning of life is orange molasses. Not 3 months old and I interpreted dozens of words and phrases. I hope her mom recorded them all in her baby book. Especially the first word, which was "Gruncle!"

I promise to spend more tent time in the coming days instead wimping out. But, really, temperatures of over 100 ought to be a little bit of an excuse.

I am trying to watch the money but it is hard, like watching someone give you a shot or draw blood. Sometimes it is easier to look away.

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Quick Austin econolodge off of 183 review: Don't Do It! I'm sure it is a suburb of hell. Sleep in your car and you will feel better. The econolodge from hell is no place for people of our breeding and culture.

The second night I stayed with N1, Mrs N1 and baby, V. The night before I felt it would be kind of an infringement upon Mrs N1's parents and would tighten the space in ways. I stand by my decision but not by my choice of inns.

Helped With Horseboy fence; they think I'm an idiot

Something about the way I am causes people to either think I'm an idiot, or they are intrigued and like to discover things about me which they seem to respect. Horse boy's dad is of the former camp. Many arrogant Brits are, I've found.

They were nice enough, especially at first. That is because the Brit chick there was talking to me while he was doing other things. He's the top dog, and, except for the cowboy who lets him use some of his pasture and fixes fences, the guy is surrounded by adoring women. The dynamic is clear, and I can't say I blame him. Resent, yes. Blame, no.

Anyway, they are hard working, tainted by mild fame and have that hipper-than-thou British-Hollywood thing going. Needless to say, there is nothing I could offer the place. Or nothing that would be accepted, short of money.

Many of the tasks involved in the 100 degree fence fixing environment were things I could tell I would be much quicker and better at doing than even the cowboy. It was just one of those things where you let the dog keep his territory.

Speaking of dogs, the ones that came out there with me, the cowboy and the adoring women of various ages--all Canadian or UK people--gravitated to me and hung around me like those pictures of St Francis. It was quiet vindication. "See? Your dogs know who I am, dammit! How bout due respect?"

So, I politely left after close to three hours.

I mentioned writing and the guy grilled me about it, wanting my book synopsis in a short sentence, which I never gave him. He assumed I'd never known or talked to an author, telling me, "this is what writers ask". No, it is not. Depends on the writer, the context, and much else. He's not buying anything so who owes him the discussion on his terms?

He ticked me off, I guess, and I think that was a two way street, although I believe I was much nicer and more gracious.

No way you can show u to such a place and expect anything, so I am ashamed of my disappointment and small degree of anger. I know I could be very beneficial to their operation and they don't seem to think anything, except I do not fit their narrow set of parameters for what is cool, therefore I am not worth much.

I'll write my damned book, get it sold and send him a signed copy with an insulting inscription. I like some Brits, but some can exude a type of snobbish arrogance that makes you want to fight the Revolutionary War all over again, tagging them as first casualty.

I once heard that there is n such thing as a free education. Let's chalk it up to that.

One puzzler was if he and the Brit chick have a thing going. Maybe not, but she would if he would, I think. Almost a cultish ambiance there.

They are smart enough people, but I guess I felt snubbed, and that makes them dumber than they realize.
It happens. Some people cannot get past "that". Maybe it is my curse and maybe it is my undeserving person filter.

Subaru Service Dept Review

Finally, while in Dallas, I was able to resolve the horn honking when I start up issue. Cousin J suggested I go to Sewell Subaru, across from Love field in Dallas.

The place is first class. The customer lounge is spiffy with plush furniture, a soda machine at your disposal, and big pot of sweet tea, and it is not like the usual waiting area. It is more like a nice hotel lobby.

The service area itself has tile floor, very spacious bays and not a spot of trash or grime anywhere.

The tech fooled with some loose wires on a tiny box that the selling dealer had on there for some security reason. That was all it took. They said they could remove the box altogether but it would cost about $100 because the guy would have to rewire the stuff back where it goes. They seemed to think it would be OK and weren't pushing to do it so I didn't.

The diagnostic charge is $80, which is explained up front. They charged $0.00. The service writer was competent and able to explain everything in detail. All of them seem competent and not trying to mouse anyone. I decided I was due an oil change since I've driven maybe 5000 miles so far and had them do it.

I wish they were in SD county because I'd rather have them do the brakes and timing belt when due than anyone else.

So, I highly recommend the Sewell Subaru service department.
And I did not wait all that long. I got there at 2 and left before 3:30.
5 stars.

Magic Is Still Mojoing

Too many things have been going on in the last few days to leave room to write. Many of them probably wouldn't excite most people, but it has been great from my view point.

My Dallas cousins give me lessons in being gracious and most other facets of life. I've had great time seeing the town with them and visiting my aunt. I also had a good visit with my cousin J's son, J. He's one upbeat good hearted guy and I think his looks will help his various efforts in the marketplace as well.

Now I'm in Austin. I spent the day holding and entertaining my not yet three months old niece, V. I'm pretty sure she was talking to me when no one else could hear. She said, "Gruncle!". Then she laid an egg, so to speak.

I have to admit, I like babies. They are at that stage I never outgrew--trying to make sense of all the sound and fury around them. She may like everyone, but I think we hit it off in any case. It's like holding a giant bobble head doll, with the object being to make sure the head stays attached. Rarely, if ever, have I seen a happier, more relaxed new mother. Now I know the pics of her working on the computer between contractions were the real deal. She said she didn't want to think about being uncomfortable and figured the baby would come pretty soon. Or something like that.

Tomorrow I'm going to meet the Horse Boy foundation people at the ranch where they work with autistic children. It's about an hour from here. I was there but it is not easy to find. I ended up at someone else's place. He said he's does work for them sometimes but today was too hot. I followed him there and no one was home. He called them up and they said 10am tomorrow would be a good time to come.

I have no idea what I expect there. I just felt a strong desire to go there from the time I watched the Horse Boy documentary. After that I will come back and adore my little grand niece and enjoy the fine view from my nephews back deck on the north west outskirts of Austin.

All the people I have connected with on this tour have been supernatural and magic. I must have needed something and they have given it. All about the love I guess.

In some cases I had apprehensions, preconceived ideas, etc., but each time those were laid to rest and I have been blown away by the acceptance, hospitality, and kindness. I hope that these people receive something of the like from me. I try but can't imagine they get as much out of it as I do. I hope so anyway.

It is still HOT everywhere. Today was 100 degrees.

How my brother raised such sons, I will never know. He broke the chain. These guys are sane and appear to have better than average functionality in their relationships. It didn't seem possible considering ...

I hope I'm around long enough to keep this little niece straight and not selling out to The Man. Tomorrow we'll work on teaching her to sing the blues.

Maybe I'll have pics to put up soon.

Still Heading Out

Woke up and got hungry so I decided to update.
It appears I'm about one of three people who come to this page, but so be it.

G1 called and convinced me to take the bassman amp with me. It won't take a lot of space. The speaker cab is what takes the space. Quite a nice gesture. These are sought after units in some circles. I'll go by to get it as I leave town. I'm still blown away by the fact they did that jam, and now I'm leaving with the dream amp.

I'm requesting that everyone in Texas run their A/C outdoors. It looks like Austin will be over 100 deg by the time I get there. Dallas is stop 1, and I doubt it will be sweater weather there. Maybe there will be a Subaru dealer who can get that horn beep problem resolved. I think it is a reprogram deal with security or something. But I also tend to think a relay could be involved.

There is also a new reprogram thing required and since it may improve winter time emmissions, CA won't re-up my registration without it. Got that notice a day ago. It is not really a problem, only a slight improvement in some cases, under certain conditions, in fuel economy and emissions. I'm not as quick to jump on that band wagon as the typical subaru owner. Say green and they'll do anything. I've discovered a lot of green cloaked initiatives and products are not really any more resource conserving and kind to the earth (which is Not my mother, has no gender or sex, and doesn't get colds and run fevers like a mammal) than the evil not cloaked in green alternatives.

Common sense and real science and data---not just the stuff that fits predetermined conclusions. That is not so easy to find, but if you look - it is there. Often all it takes is reading a cited study yourself, without bias, and you'll find it doesn't say that people who like mice are 43% more likely to die of snake bite. Or you can poke holes in the conduct of the alleged study. Generalities will get you high fives and a sense of belonging, but rarely help discern the real truth of matters.

I hope rain appears over New Mex and Arizona. Lots of it, and quick. These fires are going to force me to make a detour on the way out of Texas.

Taos was specifically on my list of places to go. It looks like I may have to go there to put out fires if this doesn't change. Maybe I can do that.

heading out

Tomorrow, Sunday, I hit the road.

The jam was good but best part is not recorded--par for course with these things.

I was stunned the old band went to such trouble to set up and play with me. G1 brought in an amp for me to play through that is best thing ever. I didn't use a delay or anything, and had real control over tone--from clean and sweet to down and dirty. Very full rich sound. An old vintage fender bassman head into a mesa boogie speaker cab with 1-12" speaker. Used audix fireball mic---very clean harp mic; can also be used for vocal.

It has been so long since I played this style and plugged in, I found myself doing things differently then I recall doing them in the past. I think I improved. That appeared to be the consensus. Drummer and bass expressed the wish that I'd stick around.

It was as much fun as I could have expected but was too short a session. G1 had to hit the road. He's got a complicated life at the moment. I know why he had to cut out, but the reason given was a smokescreen. Nothing personal toward me. I couldn't take that much tension and drama. At any rate, it was worth doing.

I'll see if part I got on video is worth sharing. Due to cam location I think all you hear is harp, and that wasn't the real mix in the room.

So, my Mesa Boogie Blue Angel is for sale because I will by G1's bassman with the money. He won't let go of the Mesa speaker cab though, s I need that. A good box with 2 10" would also work well I think.

Still in MEM

MEM is Memphis in airport lingo.

The dealer's computer can't read my car's computer because of a software glitch which won't be resolved until middle of next week. Supposedly it is ok to drive and ignore the horn beep on start up. I'll get it dealt with down the road.

I stuck an extra day or two because old band wants to meet up for a jam. I'm not sure if I was just so surprised they'd be so hospitable or if I really want to play plugged in electric one time. It has been awhile since I played anything but acoustic, just with mic on stand through PA. Different sort of music.

Anyway, I know it is time to hit the road soon. Lots of old regrets and sorrows to resolve in this town. That kind of surprises me. I figured the past was where it belongs--gone. Apparently I haven't come to grips with it totally.

Going to try to get video from the little jam tonight.

Waiting for Godot or something

So, after passing up time in a very cool region east of Chattanooga because my car horn honks quickly a couple of times when I turn the key to start it, and I didn't want to take chances so now I'm at the dealer in Memphis waiting to find out what's up.

It is 98deg F and the heat index is 103. There's an index for hot cold, everything. Once upon a time we did not have these life altering indices. Lucky us.

So, since they have wifi, I'm killing time in the ac and took a pic. Too bad I didn't catch one of the exterminator spraying in here.

Brief Documentation and review or two

Do not try this yourself--shading a tent on Ocracoke Island. I used it part of the day then took it off at night. I also soaked it in mosquito repellant. But the beach and the water--incomparable.

On the boat from Hatteras to Ocracoke.

The Carolina Country Inn motel in Burnsville, NC--in the mountains. I highly recommend this place. None of the modern inconveniences like key cards that don't work. Real keys. Chairs in front of the room that are actually cool places to hang out. Internet wifi. Big tv on the wall, windows that open. Good price.

Another recommendation.
If your are ever in Misenheimer or Ritchfield NC, there is a place on hwy 49, just off of hwy 52 called the Motel Restaurant (JUDY'S). They even include the parentheses bit on the sign.
It is a great diner in the tradition of great diners. Whatever that means. It is the place to go. That's all I can say. And they had the highest sanitation grade I've seen so far, 99%. In NC, they give you a letter grade plus post your score. I guess 95 is also an A. Maybe it goes down to 90.

It is not more than a mile or two from the Headquarters hair cutter where I lost my long hair.

Thunderstorms in the Blue Ridge tonight. Lots of spectacular lightening.
the end