Lift The Veil Of Right and Left

For their own convenience and to promote their agendas through propaganda techniques, people in public life, in the media, and in mindless mob actions tend to label things "right wing" and "left wing".  Terms which are all but meaningless if you try to hold the labels down to a test based on definition.

One is given to believe that right wing means law and order, no social programs, big on war.  And that left wing is big on government services and control of resources, social programs, not big on war but big on aiding other countries.   These are bad definitions, because when I really go to define these things, and try to keep my own extreme bias out of it, it makes no sense.

Most of the time, I would be in line with what is considered right wing--except that I think government ought not be involved pro or con in matters like abortion, marriage, or internal affairs of other lunatic states in the world.

I'm left wing when it comes to not making laws about social behavior.  But when I think of it, left wing does make laws about behavior and taxes behavior and much else.  We agree and disagree.

Here's where the terms get botched.  They always report things like "radical right wing neo-nazis blow up in attempted parallel parking caper".   Here's the news; Nazis are left wing extremists!  They are bigoted socialists, just like the Black Panthers, Al Sharpton, and Jesse Jackson.  That is, if you class Sharpton, et al, as left wing, which most people do.

If capitalists are somehow mainstream or right wing, and socialists and communists progressively left wing, then Nazi, which is socialist by definition, is a lunatic version of left wing.

You can't class something as left or right based on racism alone, although I find left wing groups, or what get labeled as left wing to be more abundantly racist that those on the right.  White supremacist groups are very few in number and have little support.  They are usually labeled right wing.

Racism in left wing circles is rampant; Black Panthers, race based hiring and admissions policy, race based contract awards, Al and Jesse inciting crowds against people based on race rather than fact--or when facts are not known--Duke rape case, whatsername Brawley, Trayvon Martin, the riot that killed the Jewish guy in NY, etc.

The whole one wing or the other thing is a bit convoluted.  But if wings must be labeled, the reality of where more violence and hate is generated is opposite from the picture painted of left wing, compassionate---right wing, violent.  But then, it is rare that the most common forms of hate crimes are labeled as such.  And everyone knows it.

But the whole idea that a violent crime needs to be treated differently depending upon the why and the victim, is absurd.  I don't care why you beat me and raped my dog, I don't like it.  The hate crime concept is absurd and only designed to make some groups more special than others.  That is how it works in practice.  Not sure which group hate-crimers fall into. I guess they usually call it right wing, but in reality, that doesn't hold water.

Anarchists, on the other hand, should be right wing, since no government is the antithesis of a socialist or communist state.   The so-called anarchists we see these days can't possibly be anarchists in the true definition of the word.

If you do not believe in laws and a body of authority to enforce them, you certainly cannot say you are allied with the communist party, and it seems odd that you have an official logo, flag, and organize to protest because you think certain groups aren't regulated enough and that unions should have more power.  Lot of "archy" in that.  Your name suggests you are all about no archy at all.

Liars.

I just thought I'd mention that left right confusion.  I'm thinking of getting new flags made which I can send to the mis-labeled anarchists.  It would be a capital I instead of capital A in the middle of a circle.  Or maybe a question mark, as a friend suggested. The I would stand for idiot.  Then they could really be in solidarinosc; "Idiots of the wold unite!"  Plenty of takers for that proposition.

I'll go back to reclusion.  Politics has become an odd religion to many, and often people bring their religion into it.  Left, right, and who knows.  You tell me Chris Matthews does not have the same awe and worship of Obama as any Christian has of Jesus.  So his religion is government as it now exists, while many want to bring in Christianity, Islam, you name it.

What a pain.  Government should have such limited power that you can't even slide any of this stuff in. But it does have power.  That's what people do.  Just look at any condo association if you don't think power feeds on itself and that the average Joe won't let power go to his head.  Few can resist abusing even minor power.  I, of course, am one of the very few who is not one to abuse power when I have it.

So, once again, I truly am your best hope for president.  I'll even marry someone and promise she won't waste time and money on some cause like dirty fingernails in America, or dandruff in the workplace, or the tattoo epidemic.  Imagine that?  No subtle royalty behavior being foisted upon a nation which forbids titles of nobility, and royal power.   It would be the first time in forever.

Those people who swooned over the Kennedy years calling it Camelot have no idea what they were saying.  You really want to live in a monarchy?  That is your dream, so you imagine a presidential family that you like to be our ruling monarchs?  And you imagine yourself bowing as their carriage passes by?  You freedom hating fool!

The Pot Calling the Kettle Rotund

Never again will I smugly brag, even silently, about how I can effortlessly control my weight.   I can't say that I've actually tried all that hard, but I am finding this belly situation a little disconcerting.

It used to be that I could cut out a few meals, eat less when I did have a meal, and in no time, my appetite was minimal and I became skinny.  I'm still sort of slender, but I have a beer gut; and I don't even drink.

I have been eating fewer meals but, unlike my past experiences, I think about eating, and how I want to feed myself constantly.  I believe I am being shown just a hint of what many people go through.  It is hard for people to burn more fuel than they take in.  I guess that is why they invented amphetamines and manual labor.

Exercise, just for the sake of exercise, to me, is as unpleasant as laying on the beach.  I love the coast and the beach, but I have to be doing something.  I can't just lay there.

Walking is great, and walking up my hill can be a pretty good energy burner.   I find it tougher to do things like walking unless I am going somewhere, or just kissing up to some dame who wants to walk aimlessly.  In both cases I suppose I'm trying to get to  defined destination for a defined purpose.

For me to walk to the store would be a major outing; 9 miles there losing 2000 feet in elevation, and then the walk back.  One day I may do it, but no way that will become one of my habits designed to divorce myself from this jelly belly and keep it gone.

It is easy to see how people make money off of fad diets and all else related to losing weight.  I'm still far enough on this side of the line to see what a scam that really is most of the time.

I probably wouldn't care if I were married.  As it is there's a skinny chick who is way too healthy and athletic for me to feel comfortable wooing in my present shape.  Fortunately she is not local and not likely to work out long term.  Things could go differently, but I tend to doubt it.  Whether that is a defense mechanism at play, or actual intuition at work, I don't know.

In any case, it is a lame, semi-motivational excuse to avoid letting this situation get any further out of hand.  The best thing is to do more work.  Physical work.  Things you can see like build a house,  dig for gold,  catch rabbits bare handed and make fuzzy sweaters with the hide--that sort of thing.

Actually, I'm trying to talk myself into the female-motivates-me thing.  In truth, I have no idea for sure what I am thinking.  I certainly do admire this person's character and such.  But that is the story of my life.  I'm too peculiar for these self assured, very cool women to deal with, even when they like me.

I'm not about to get behind that 8 ball again.  I'll lose the belly, but I am uncertain about not remaining a semi-recluse.  Company--fine.  Commitment--I can't visualize that at this time.

Karma.  I believe it happens because I tend to learn things which I did not properly appreciate in the past.  Empathy and sympathy are qualities that I find tend to expand as I get older.   That, and my libertarian leaning philosophy toward matters public.

Many do not see how the two go hand in hand.  But they do.

So, to all you kettles out there, this pot understands and will not be calling you rotund.  We jolly jigglies need to stick together.  Michele O can't help us.  I think that since she started calling everyone obese and making it her business, she's been putting on padding herself.  As if I need some wannabe royalty involved in my health and diet anyway.

Maybe when people run for president they should disclose what stupid crusades their spouses plan to waste our time and money to promote.  I wish none of them would have any crusade.  Go play tennis.  Have affairs.  Become obese. Just stay out of things and shut up.  The spouses aren't holding elective office.

One Man's Junk Is Another Man's and/or Woman's Treasure

There are times when news stories serve to help one realize that his life is only marginally offbeat, and certainly a preferable existence to some.

Here is an excerpt from a news story which could cause one to ponder, yet, in the end, my only question is why sue, and why would it take 20 months to decide something was amiss.

 — a California man says the seat on his motorcycle has given him an erection he just can’t shake.

Henry Wolf of California is suing BMW America and aftermarket seatmaker Corbin-Pacific claiming his issue began after a four-hour ride on his 1993 BMW motorcycle, with a ridge like seat. Wolf is seeking compensation for lost wages, medical expenses, emotional distress and what he calls “general damage.”

He said he’s had the erection non-stop for 20 months. 

California, of course.  Really, this is not a totally nuts state.  Most of these things come from north of San Diego and south of Mt Shasta.  Oh, oops, that covers most of the state doesn't it?

If only this could somehow be tied in with the political tripe that is out there--now that would be something on which you could hang your hat.

Sorry, no photo or video available at this time.  It is telling what makes news these days.  And what makes it to the world of civil suits.

Woke Up This Morning; part 426012

You know something is amiss when you wake up wondering what you've done to screw up your life.  "Oh, geez, what did I do now?!"

It must be chronic depression; a battle and a mind game.  Don't believe what you tell yourself, unless it is good.  Don't believe the bad stuff or you never get a breather.

Oh well.  I'll go to the Thursday open mic, even though I don't care for it much; bad sound, they charge a fortune for coffee, food, and even water isn't provided.

I'll bootleg my own water and coffee.

Good Bad Ugly; part 425012

Little nibbles seem to be increasing in frequency.  I didn't even know I was fishing.  Another guy, who claims I played with him at one of the open mics I rarely attend, called in reference to a benefit, and something about a jam.  He also mentioned being at the Crest gig.

I remember giving out contact info to a couple of people who asked, but I seem to have trouble remembering everyone that asked me to play over the last couple of months.  It would be good if something came out of this, like some studio work or other pay-to-play opportunities.

It is probably good, though, because I seem to have a reputation in an expanding circle of musicians, and it appears to be a favorable one.  Why not?  I'm more reliable than most and make an effort to just do what I do without hogging the limelight.  That may be the secret to being a sideman who is welcome.

There has been other talk, but until I see substance, I treat it as only talk.  Deep down I hope it is real because it would be quite rewarding.  The best thing is to keep being seen.  There are little subplots to all this which have to do with trying to benefit some people I like who need the diversion right now.

Those are things of life; doing things for the purpose of enhancing one's existence and/or the existence of others.   What that entails is often the sort of thing I just keep to myself.   I'd be disappointed if I found myself deep into the Jerry Lewis syndrome.  If you don't get the meaning of that, then don't worry about it.

I look out the back door, down at the little box canyon and out to the ridge beyond, and I realize how fortunate I am to be where I am.  And I realize that it is not guaranteed that I'll be able to be here forever. It is alright.  One evening, within the last three, it was so dark and foggy out on the back deck that I could not see my hand held in front of my face.

Tonight, I heard just a few rain drops under a dark, overcast sky, but I could see the edge of the clouds out over the ridge, and to the left, over Alpine.  I could still see a little bit of light there.  Nice effect.

I guess there isn't much ugly, except that sometimes people think I don't consider them, their feelings, dreams, and whatnot.  It really is not true, but I can see how it appears.  I just don't pry much or offer opinions on what they ought to do with themselves.

Then again, it doesn't take much encouragement for me to become a little too self absorbed.  In ways, I am not that, but there are times when the better part of me definitely is.  I try.  There are mitigating circumstances which I am sure few others would understand, even if they were aware, but it is worth monitoring myself so that I am not so ..whatever.

I've come to realize it is not always easy.  And I do get it back. In one case, recently, I find that my life is of no real interest, which is both frustrating and interesting.  It leaves me feeling of no use, value or interest.  Maybe that is why that person crossed my path.  I must be careful not to cause others to feel that way.  I know it is not intentional on the part of the party of whom I speak, but I see no changing it.

I always think that friends will ask if they want to know what I think.  I am wary of being too sure that I know what others should be doing with their lives, talent, etc.  It is one thing to be empathetic, and another to assume you know what another's best interest really is.  I'll bet someone told Lincoln he needed to get out and see a play.  "Abe, loosen up!  Go out; take the old lady to the theater."

Fate and Fortune part 4 22 12

Different forms of good fortune have come my way lately.  Some of it, I had been advised to expect, but I did not consider it a sure thing.  It took a little while to put it out of my mind and not dream up stupid ways to depend upon vague expectation.  Or even probable expectation.

I have a friend who was expecting part of the family inheritance and all appeared done and good.  All it took was one psychopathic sibling, an unethical, and unscrupulous attorney, and a lengthy lawsuit in a venue many miles away.

Now my friend is worse off than he would have been had nothing ever been slated to come his way.  The legal system quite often becomes a lawyer's game of chess and results in anything but where truth and justice would lead.

The part that I think is most emotionally difficult is to plan on a thing, believe there is every reason to plan on it, and then have one's reality radically altered, dissolving your dreams in an instant.  It is tough to readjust, and accept reality, let go of the pain, anger and disappointment that type of loss brings.

When there was no point to the things that caused the dream to be smashed, it can stick with you and remain a tender spot indefinitely.   That tends to make moving on from there, seeing another way,  generally learning to seek happiness, a difficult, if not impossible task.  There are people who do it, and people who don't.  Anger is often not your friend. It can trap.

Even when the anticipated good fortune is not squelched by stupid things like corrupt people, and such evils, it is a shock when it doesn't materialize.  Disappointing, at least, and often in a way that requires some regrouping.

The trick is not to expect much, and try to refuse to believe that job is yours until it is in hand, that money until you see it, etc.

So, one thing came through that I'd managed to put out of my mind altogether, so it was a treat and almost a surprise.  Another thing came up that is merely a promise of something, and as much as I'd love for it to be true, I think the skeptic's approach is the healthiest.  I'll believe it when I see it.

I found myself thinking as if that thing had come true, and how I could then not be doing things I no longer enjoy, and how I'd have some sort of passion or enjoyment with this.  It is related to getting paid and I guess a form of work.

But, I see nothing today, and I am going to forget about the big talk and promise.  No need to discount anything.  I'm certainly open to opportunity.  But it may be best not to hold my breath until it materializes into something I can spend.

heartbreak continued

The last post neglected the heartbreak part.   Typically, the writer of that post wandered off into the weeds, and before it was over, it was way to long of a post.

The heartbreak theme came to me when I was contemplating the ones that got away, and the fact that I both allowed and condoned such a turn of events.  Being me is an odd proposition.

I figure if I cannot make myself less of a risk, can't make myself more available, then how can I encourage anyone I really care about to put their eggs in this basket?   I can't if I am to maintain any integrity as I see it.

However, I have faith that one of these days the tables will turn and I'll know I've encountered the person whose best interests coincide with mine, and I won't feel guilty encouraging the commitment.

Most of the time I really don't care.  I do enjoy knowing that some people are happy and doing well, even if it sometimes causes me to see my own deficiencies which then generates that little pang of heartbreak.

I don't think the heartbreak is over any person, but over whatever it was in my life that compels me to somehow deny my own existence to the point that I feel honor bound to drive away the people I most want close.  I'm speaking of women here.  But I guess I keep everyone at more than arm's distance.

I break my own heart.  But I am OK with that, and doubt it is a thing that can't improve.  It has improved by shades over the past five years or so.

HeartBreak and New Looks

Blogger's New Look!!--they are so excited over this--is not better or easier for me. They do not like my browser. It comes up with some message about an unknown item that may or may not be supported by my browser. I have to click the "dismiss" button to make it go away. It is right next to the google Chrome button.

 Google is dying for me to use their intrusive browser, Chrome. No, thank you. I started to download it one time, in one of my biggest sucker on earth stupors. It wanted so much info and seemed way too nosy about everything and wanted to make love to all my other files, applications, and programs.

 I just couldn't have that, so I stopped it and did my best to remove all traces from the computer. I stopped it before it was entrenched, like a tick. Many programs are like ticks from hell. You think you ripped it out but it leaves something behind to make trouble.

 So, new blogger is pimping for google chrome. They are trying to sucker apple safari users. I have firefox, but I mostly use safari. I like it. The fact that there was no issue prior to the big new look, and the main issue now is that they want me to switch to their data mining evil tyrant browser, causes me to think this blogger thing is a google inspired conspiracy.

 Weren't they the company whose motto was "Do no evil"?

 Funny how those things are so often the exact opposite of intent, or action. This appears to be designed by the same people who new-looked gmail. It is not a better look. Just new.

Take heed, it is much like the hooplah and hoax that eventually became the car companies. Change things regularly, even when no improvement is made to the product, and then convince people that they need the new one.

 For example, until they actually improved function, handling, etc. There was little need to alter the 56 or 57 Chevy. I would have held it at 56. Many liked the 57. The 58 was a waste of time. All they did was alter cosmetics, and not often for the better. I would have stuck with 56. Maybe waited until the 64 stuff came out.

 Chrome is an apt name. All shiny, but that's it. Makes a good vitamin in low doses.  Great for fishing lures; suckers 'em every time.

It Is A Jungle Out There

Wow. Another wonderful use of tax money. Some people's lives could be radically improved with that money, but I'm sure even more lives will be saved with the EPA's latest group think effort.

They want you to write a six word essay to celebrate the environment. Six words for the planet (earth, I'm assuming)

What does that even mean? How do you celebrate the environment? Is that like celebrating gravity, or the floor, or some other non event I can't quite imagine?

I suppose the first I began to hear of celebrating non events was when my ex wife said something about some kind of women's event that was a celebration of women. I'd have enjoyed that except it was, apparently, all women. And I wonder why I had my suspicions that she might graze on both sides of the fence. I'm thinking that to properly celebrate women, interesting events would have been in the mix. Events worth celebrating, perhaps.

The title is my six word essay. Next year I will celebrate the climate. After that, I will celebrate dreams. Oh, and I need to celebrate Outer Space before too many years pass.

I'm sorry, but from the early seventies on I argued for independence from the power grid, ways of using various used containers and other refuse for building materials, etc. However, I think things like Earth Day make no sense at all. If you want to include fertility rites and frolic in the forest, maybe it will make sense to me. I get nauseated when I see people out to be seen and accepted making a big deal about how much they love "the earth".

I'm on board with not being destructive or polluting in obvious ways. I'm not on board with much of the theme that all industry is bad and humans are evil and bears are better and blablabla. The only way humans survived so well as a species is due directly to our ability to protect ourselves from the environment, because the environment can be a hostile and fickle tyrant.

So, weather permitting, and barring any natural disasters, we can make a big show of planting a tree and reciting earthy essays. The ones I saw on the dot gov site were somehow political. one people, one home, one --I forgot. You get the idea. We go from the environment to solidarinosc.

I'm still stuck on what a camping expedition on some beach dedicated to "celebrating women" would entail. Clever choice of words, eh? It had to pop into my mind due to wondering what it means to celebrate a non event. I may celebrate my toes this year as well.

My final essay of six words still stands: It is a jungle out there!!! I decided punctuation could give it a little zip.

Song of the South; part 4192012

So I go over to Big O's friend's place to do some piddly maintenance, and to screw around with that teak some more. The stuff looked good initially but this oil finish routine is not suitable for this particular bunch of furniture. I researched and learned how to do it because way back at the beginning of the saga, house manager wanted it done they way they do marine teak, using oil finish. At that time I was all for poly urethane or something of that nature.

At any rate, I learned and believed it would work out. It is not really working out. I'm going to call the manufacturer, hoping they are still in business and see what they used to begin with. Even though their lacquer or varnish did not hold up, it still may be better, especially since they eventually got covers for the stuff. If it were mine, I'd just pressure wash it now and then and let it be gray. That isn't acceptable to those who own it or manage the house, so we go with another plan.

Anyway, I arrive and walk out to the courtyard/pool area where a guy is on a ladder putting pieces of copper on top of some of the beams. I was friendly, even though when I greeted him he replied with the belligerent toned version of "Can I help you?". I explained that I frequently do odd jobs and maintenance there, and that I would be sure not to interfere with his project.

He then gives a little, annoying chuckle as he says, giggle giggle, You sound like you're from Tennessee, giggle laugh. It was a total non sequitur, as I had just asked a question regarding my efforts not to do my work in the possible path he might take as he did his thing.

I stared at him for a few seconds, then asked, "Is that funny?" I get so sick of people who think the slightest bit of southern accent represents ignorance, incest, etc. That is very much the way it is in California. Most of these people have never been to the South, and certainly haven't spent enough time there to have a clue about the people or the culture.

Mr. Roofer caught me in a mood which was not one of the most tolerant or forgiving in my arsenal of moods. His comment and manner were not of the variety of friendly interest or in any way complimentary. I stood there resisting putting voice to what had filled my mind. Two words, the last of which was "you!!".

I stood staring, then turned and walked away. He'd answered the question about whether it was funny with something unintelligible and an I guess so. He was on a ladder and seemed frozen, like he didn't know whether to ascend or descend.

It is not good, but I felt that if I stuck around that I'd have vented my rage at the arrogance of many in this state, and my rage at things unidentified, even in my mind. Wisely, I went to sit in my car and cool off. I called Fin.

Sometimes I think I'd like to move back to south, but then I remember how 99% of the black people seem to hate you and want to give you a hard time. It is not hard to find someone eager to beat you to a pulp, kill you, or rob you--because of race. Racism is the curse. That and belligerent ignorance. Life is hard so it must be your fault.

Much is magnificent out here. In some ways I suppose I became permanently southernized. That involves a certain mode of courtesy, pride, and respect. That doesn't involve race or incest or any of the stereotypes I see circulated out here in media and general culture.

I've been in the ethnic minority in two or three cities where I lived for a number of years. That can be educational. I get along with anyone who is halfway congenial.

So, you want to break it all down by ethnicity, then you best be prepared to own it. Or maybe you want what I want--to become a nation of individuals judged by your good looks, and your character.

Being lumped in with a group forces you to take on guilt for their crimes as well as credit for their accomplishments. Unless, of course, you only identify when it serves some selfish end.

But we all want to be victims. I'm a victim because I'm Black; because I'm Mexican; because I'm White; because I'm poor; because I'm rich; because I'm ugly; because I'm pretty; because I'm too smart to be understood; because I'm a dimwit...

Victim grouping is a big business. Look how hard Jesse and Al try to keep fanning that flame. They must be running out of good fuel because they tend to jump on cases which aren't clear cut, before the facts are known, and many times it turns out they labeled the real criminal as the victim. In some cases, there may be no case at all, in reality. KKK uses the same tactic, but not many people sucker for it. I do not consider Jesse and Al any more legitimate, at this point in time, than the White supremacist groups.

Sooner or later someone will figure out that no group has been free of being victimized in one way or another at some point in history. One fact which goes unstated is that most groups have done as much to screw themselves over as the groups they identify as their enemy. That goes for black, white, yellow, mellow, red, taupe, and mauve, men, women, blablabla.

Don't lump me in with any of them because no one speaks for me. And I don't trust others of any group to which I may belong to voice anything agreeable to me. However, I guess I am somewhat of a Southerner. But only in the very best and finest aspects of that culture.

And the case can be made for any group's claim to victimization even now. It does not serve the cause of liberty, equality under the law, or any of the tenets necessary for a society of free individual humans.

In any case, many of the best artists, writers, musicians and people of note were native Southerners. So back off, California!
And besides, I have hardly any accent at all.