Genius. Really

This lady explains things that I have never been able to express properly.  Or maybe I have and I encountered the same genre of reactions and fears she describes.

There is not a 100% literal correlation between her post and my life, but it is way closer than you might think.  Except, with me, it has come and gone many times, and lasted even longer.  Remember, we are not talking literal correlations.  I never had dinosaur toys, and didn't talk to the ones I had.

So, if it is of any interest, by referring you to her blog I'm blurting out a half hearted confession, I think.  Today I feel less like the condition she describes, but not much less.

So go here http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/

She is absolutely brilliant and there aren't so many words.  She has fabulous, hilarious illustrations and it isn't boring like some of my stuff can be.

The text, though, is very well written. This chick is definitely a cut or two above.

Whoever she is, I think I love her because she explains what haunts me. A lot. And she makes me laugh, and she draws pictures with easy to read text.

Others must like her.  5000 comments on 1 entry?  She typically only gets 2000 or so.

Yea.  I know she's way younger, twenty something or maybe thirty something.  I love her anyway.

De-Programmed

For some time now I have avoided any TV show with a laff track.   Intellectually, and I'm no major intellect, I find it condescending and insulting.  Really?  You think I need to be cued and prodded to spot humor?

OK.  So I don't like the canned laughter. Secretly, I thought that push come to shove I could deal with it in a pinch.

I wanted some background entertainment as I tackle the 400 and some square feet of mess which has terrorized me for who knows how long.   I saw a show that looked interesting on Hulu, and I did the proper sequence of clicks to get 'er rolling.  Then I went to brew a pot of espresso.  OH MY GOD.

The initial dialog was mildly interesting, for about 3 seconds.  Then it happened.  I heard the fake laughter.  It grated on my nerves far worse than fingernails scratching across a blackboard ever have.  It made my skin crawl, my stomach felt nauseous, my head began to threaten serious ache.

I leaped through the clutter to shut that show down.  Then I breathed a sigh of relief, suddenly becoming aware that on top of all else, the canned laughter had stopped my breathing.

Over the years most of us who view even a moderate amount of television have become conditioned to take the laff track as normal, not giving it a second thought.  I realized that I have become de-programmed, like those kids that get kidnapped back from religious cults by their families.  It takes some serious de-programming for many of them, and that may be more serious.

The point is, I was once conditioned to not only accept the laff track, but to chuckle along with it.  That cannot be good.

I feel like I've achieved something.  A little victory earning me more control of my life and psyche.  I won't say empowered because that word generally annoys the hell out of me.  Kind of like "you go girl!" does.  That's got sexist overtones, and is generally uttered by some wannabe doing that waggle thing.  Obnoxious.

Maybe I really am achieving freedom a small bit at a time.

A Tale of Two Harps in a Datsun 510 Wagon

Once upon a time, on a dark, rainy night in Greensboro, N.C. I found myself and my old Datsun up on that hill which served as the parking lot for New York Pizza--eatery and pub.  Maybe it was summertime, or autumn.  It was definitely night time.

My friend Joel and I were there for reasons which I do not recall.  Maybe he does.  Whatever the original reason, we decided to attempt a 2 harmonica jam.  At that time, I guess I considered Joel somewhat of a protege on bluesharp.  By then he already surpassed me in certain respects.  From the start he was the only harp player I knew who had sense enough to make it work when two harps play.  Normally multiple blues harps make worse noise than cat in heat, fighting.

That night we developed some kind of groove which evolved and got wild.  I closed my eyes and felt like I was flying.  I remember I pushed myself to do things I didn't know I could do.  My heart was in it.  Time lost meaning and I can't say if we were there for a minute or hours.

All I know is that, at some point, I opened my eyes and it was raining, and people were standing outside the car cheering or applauding.  Where did they come from?  And standing in the rain listening to us!  That felt pretty good.

I have no idea what we played.  Joel is very good with solid, funky rhythm.  He kept it moving and kept the rhythm working, which gave me something to work with, I think.  He did that better than I've ever been able to.

There was something magical about that little concert.  My friend won't let me forget it.  He seems to think I was channeling something special that night.  He has also commented that, while I may be better now, he wonders if I ever really pour my heart out like that any more because he hasn't seen it in any videos.

I argued, of course, that he didn't know what he was talking about, but I figured out he is right.  Or was.  I like much of the more disciplined stuff I'm doing, but that feeling of really letting go is rare rare rare.

Very hard to describe that state of being, but it is why I play--hoping to feel a little of that.  How it sounds, I don't know, but how it feels I do know.  It is addictive to the point where I play stuff that doesn't move me at all, hoping for a chance to sail into wonderland.   Sometimes years go by without a taste of it.

Lately, I've brushed up against that place a few times.  Mostly because Joel was pushing me to let go and do it.  Good thing he's still in NC.  I wouldn't put up with such advice in person.  I don't care if he has a point.

That night was like a step away from time.  It was as if nothing existed.  Strange.  That was almost half my lifetime ago.

Still, I remember the way it felt.

Another new Music Kick

While I still find Los Lonely Boys often produce music that suits my soul like no other, I'm on a bit of a Leonard Cohen kick at the moment.

I've always liked lyrics which ring of superior poetic substance.  Lenny does that well.  It usually has lustful overtones, which also suits me just fine.

Like many artists I feel his political bent is somewhat naive, yet well meaning, but what can you do.  That's why I do not put politics in any songs I write or sing.  At least so far.  It queers the deal.

OK.  The jig is up.  Got to get to cleaning and detrashing and de-filthing my abode.  They are painting stuff tomorrow and no getting out of opening the door for them because they are going to paint it.

This is good.  Whatever illness it is that makes me punish myself by being so insanely negligent when it comes to maintaining my personal environment and affairs is temporarily put at bay when THEY close in---witnesses who aren't likely to tolerate or make excuses for the results of my bad habits.

So, I'm pumped. Life gets better.

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I Did Tell You So

Way back in September of 2012, maybe forty years ago in Jay Carney Years, I remember expressing extreme skepticism and disbelief upon hearing the story that an unknown cartoon of a video had sparked an attack on the embassy in Benghazi.   "It was a demonstration and a spontaneous attack in response to a hateful, insulting video", said Hillary and a host of others.  (similar words. this is close enough)

I watched the video, which was really a kind of disjointed trailer, and hilarious in it's odd green screen work.  The Prophet (pbuh) was standing in mid air and everything was off.  It was not hateful, just weird.

Anyway, I said I did not believe anyone ever watched the video until they made it the scapegoat for the attack.  Turns out, there was no demonstration, only attack, and one that included stuff not commonly carried to a protest, even over there; artillery, mortars and that type of thing.

Obama and Hillary apologized time and time again for it. The big O even lamented that he couldn't ban such things because his hands were tied by US law, and pesky freedoms individuals are guaranteed.   That struck me odd at the time, and odd now.

It is even odder since all the evidence suggests that our people knew from day one that this was one of those radical islamic events and not a protest.  So, how they get out of being cited for outright deception, I don't know.  Presidents and their administrations, and most all other branches of our government have made deception a fine art for quite some time.  Few administrations have enjoyed the lack of real accountability this one has, although they still managed to a point beyond the line of decency.

I think it is every bit as significant as Watergate, although I don't know of any dead bodies involved in that one.  Poor Barack, first people got killed due to the bizarre gun scheme known as Fast and Furious, and now this.  With help from the comedians who have become the major source of news for a generation, the powers that be have successfully stifled much legitimate criticism by classing those who dare question the king as right wing kooks, conspiracy theorists, and, of course, as racists.

People do conspire and cover things up.  Questioning that is considered weirdo conspiracy theorizing.  Sometimes weird conspiracies do happen.  Painting any such inquiry and questioning as mental illness is pure propaganda.

Perhaps things will get interesting.  Not holding my breath.  DC is a place of blackmail, extortion, theft, and worse.  To think this is a democrat vs republican thing may be a mistake.  I have a feeling some of the top gop'ers will pretend to be truth seeking while actually melting into the typical republican nonsense, as is the way of the Boehners, McCains, and apparently Rubios.

Big O advised the grads at a university the other day not to pay any attention to the man behind the curtain.  He told them to pay no heed to those who warn of tyranny in their government.  He's probably right.  It is too damn late, and what can you do?  Not that he meant it that way.

Even Eisenhower warned of it, in his own way.  The place was established by people who were paranoid of tyrants, Barry!  Geez.  That is the whole idea.  Always, the ruling elite, and governments of all types, have tended to increase and solidify their power and control over their citizens.  And it has always become a real threat to the innocent who just want to live, work, create and have sex in peace.

I am actually becoming a little bit worried.  The healthcare thing is going to be trouble for me, and one day I may be a criminal because I don't have insurance and refuse to do business with the exchanges or have the government decide whether I qualify for their help or not.  Actually it would be your help if you are a taxpayer.  In my mind I'd be a criminal for being too polite to force you to pay for my medical needs.

What a pain it is being me.  If I could be like most people, I would not think this way at all.  As it is, I can't let my pragmatism outweigh what I consider a matter of honor.  And I don't care if you or John Stewart or anyone else thinks that makes me fodder for ridicule.

However these things go, be wary of trusting republicans to be a reliable alternative.  In many ways they are far less oppressive, but in others they are moreso.

In the EU they are trying to make it so you can only plant approved seeds.  This is like a Monsanto wet dream, and the language of pretending it is "for your own good" is highly bizarre and transparent.  We are probably right behind them.  It is possible that Joe, the organic gardener and horticulturalist, could be a criminal for using his own seeds and hybrids and such.

Maybe the Save the Planet slogan will change to Save the Prison.  Whatever the case, I hope people will suspend their unconditional Obama worship, or gop opposition worship, long enough to see how boldly corrupt the people with the guns are.

And you wonder why I don't want laws limiting the lunatic public from being armed however they see fit?  I trust my friends and neighbors more than I trust the feds or the state.  I trust gangs and thugs about the same as I trust the people who now control the country and my state.

Really.

Modern government in the USA punishes the innocent for the crimes of the vile and defective, in one way or another.  And always, they reward themselves.  The constitution was supposed to limit their power but it only works if anyone pays attention to it, which they don't.  The world of the book, 1984, will be paradise compared to our future if the path doesn't change.

But I will find ways to indulge in mischief and enjoyment from time to time regardless.   I feel it my obligation not to let anyone or anything outside myself prevent me from appreciating being alive.

the end

Early Christmas List So You Can Save Up for It

An acoustic guitar.  Six string, or acoustic bass.  Steel strings, preferably.
The perfect woman for me who can get past my "that' glitch.

the end

Rancho San Diego Social Club*

That also includes the Santee, El Cajon, and La Mesa Social Clubs.   All of those locales are basically suburbs of San Diego, and all are in San Diego County, which is huge.

On Saturdays, now that it is fairly warm, they have an open mic event in the afternoon outside a Starbucks of all places.  As you can see, it is clean, beautiful and the kind of thing you can't do in many cities due to the preponderance of riffraff and defective humans.

On the day pictured there were some good players, many of whom play regular gigs around SoCal.   A duo named Mockingbird is one of my recent favorites.  It is a husband and wife team with a unique style.  She sings and plays drums while he adds harmony and plays a mean guitar.  They rock.

Very decent people.  Mockingbird; good name, good humans.

This view is looking out from the patio, toward the south, sort of toward where I live.  I'm 20 miles east and south of there, and this is the closest of the venues where I play these days.  Of course, I live about 10 miles from the nearest store, so what' another ten miles?  Mexico is not far past that peak.

A nice thing.  People hang out and listen for awhile as they run errands.  Starbucks sells frappacinos (how do you spell that?) for half price, and life is good.  Lots of people play.  It went on from 2pm to almost 9.

So, that is what it looks like.  We're not in Memphis anymore.  If we were, they'd have to have security people everywhere to prevent the gimme dolla guys and others from harassing the innocent and attacking the non-violent.

the end
*
*rip off on the name Buena Vista Social Club.  
One of the few certainties in my life and mind is that I am drawn to many things with strong Latin influence.  Especially music---a mix of Mexican, Cuban, and whatnot.  Never been to whatnot but I have set foot in Cuba and Mexico. and Miami.  So there you have it.

Why Not Cut to the Chase: Bill of Absurdities

There seems to be a lot of confusion regarding rights both here and abroad.   More and more it seems that things which have only been mentioned in the realm of rights in recent decades tend to conflict with other rights.  The result is an increasing narrowing of the definitions of free speech and free press, and a few others.

Because the issues that come up are rarely cut and dried, confusion often ensues.  To solve this, I suggest introducing a Bill of Absurdities which enumerates those things which are not natural individual right, but rather conditions placed on others which serve to appease the various victims of the world and of life itself.

Here is an incomplete version of the Bill.  It's all we have so far.

All people and, in some cases, non-human persons have the right to never encounter a fear inducing situation

All people and, in some cases, non-human persons have the right to have their self esteem boosted and to never encounter the disapproval or dislike of others

No one shall ever have to endure an insult, or a compliment which could be interpreted as gender specific or somehow hurtful to others who did not receive a compliment

All people and, in some cases, non-human persons have the right to never be the recipient of a dirty look or stink eye (this will be expanded upon in a future bill to ban bullying and hostile sounding automobile horns)

All people and, in some cases, non-human persons have a right to stylish, new, comfortable clothes and shoes that fit well

All people and, in some cases, non-human persons have the right to proclaim themselves victims as long as they can cite one expert, author, or unsubstantiated fact or anecdote supporting such claim

All people and, in some cases, non-human persons have the right to seek and expect something for nothing in every facet of their lives

All people and, in some cases, non-human persons have the right to break shop windows and disrupt business areas, residential neighborhoods, and any other populated place, as well as the right to stop traffic if they think they have a good reason to be mad and that their cause is good

All people and, in some cases, non-human persons have the right to expect that they will never be harmed by objects of any kind; animate or inanimate. (this also covers things like falls)

All people and, in some cases, non-human persons have the right to any and all drugs, including alcohol, as the government sees fit

All these rights apply to all people and, in some cases, non-human persons but they may apply more to some people than others, depending upon unknown factors which will be determined by the official leaders at their discretion and leisure, however such determinations must not be considered permanently binding or be used as legal precedent, as all may change with different administrations, varying weather, and general societal mental health.  In short, the law applies equally to everyone, except for those who are more equal. Or less equal.  Whatever the case there is always to be a bit of equal there.

There are more, but this should give a good start.

Clarity is achieved because the Bill of Absurdities trumps the Bill of Rights whenever the two may conflict.  It lets people know what is likely to land them in trouble.  Maybe if this passes, fewer hours of media time will be wasted on celebrity and politician apologies.

It is confusion that undoubtedly leads a person to feel comfortable speaking his mind, only to later realize that by discussing, for example, hair do's he offended some group; the follicley challenged, in this case.  Next thing you know, the horrible person is making the rounds of the talk shows/news shows apologizing for being horrible.

It is so rare that I actually believe the apology that I can't remember the last time I did.  Most of the groups that insist on the apology do the best they can to grind it in and kind of control the person.  There is a real power dynamic, fed by the humiliation of the politically incorrect---those who violate the precepts and/or the letter of the proposed Bill of Absurdities.

Those people are figuratively placed in stocks in the public square so the fidgety public can pelt them with rotten vegetables.

The UN and some other fine money laundering outfits already have made efforts similar to the measures in this bill, but my proposal is more transparent and useful for those who seek guidance from the authorities for their behavior.

And it is a great tool for those who enjoy monitoring the discourse of fellow citizens/and/or non-citizens so they can report violations.   Once passed, they'll be able to enjoy that warm feeling that comes from seeing lives ruined and non-violent people put in prison, or executed.

I suggest a three strike rule.  Violate someone's enumerated Absurd Guarantees three times and you get dead.   Not sure how.  Probably stoning.  Again, this will reduce the volume of apologies in the media. Some people have gone on to say "Sorry" time and time again.  This way, you hear it no more than twice from the same individual because third violation is curtains.  And sentence should be carried out maybe a day or two after the infraction.  Again, such a policy would apply more equally in some cases than others, while there is always at least a grain of equal maintained throughout the process.

No need for trial.  Just being accused is enough.  It isn't the substance of the complaint but the gravity of the charge that is important.
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Pacific Crest Trail; who knew?

All this time I have been going up to Kwymaii--forgot how to spell it--road on Mt. Laguna, not realizing that the Pacific Crest Trail goes right through that spot.  It is one of the major hiking trails in the US.

You can take it from Mexico up into Canada somewhere.  If I had some people to go with who knew what they were doing, and who weren't as scared of bears as I am, I might be motivated to get into shape.  I can be at the trailhead in Campo in about an hour.

If the right woman knew this stuff and wanted to go, I could do that.  Someone else would have to be the brains of this endeavor.  I could do OK because I can make things work and use resources at hand.  I don't know much about the whole long hike deal though.  And I'm a little skittish when it comes to some animals.  I know.  Wimpy for such an otherwise macho man.

The other afternoon I saw four or five hikers with substantial packs cruising through.  They better hope the fires up in Riverside county go away before they get there.  It will take them a few more days, I think.

I'm not sure I'd even care about starting at Campo.  People who want to be official have to do that.  Lots of uphill hiking, and twists and turns.

I toyed with the idea of taking solo journeys out there for a few days at a shot.  But I think I'd rather just table it unless the right situation came about.  I don't know.  I could escape every now and then, but I hate to leave my car anywhere like at a trailhead.  I suppose I could hike for a long long day to get to a trailhead from home.

Maybe later.  Besides I don't own a backpack or any of the proper stuff for long hikes.

Did I Miss It Already?

Being the conscientious, gung-ho, law loving citizen that I am, I try to keep up with the basics of what is happening in the world of governments.  That covers 99% of what is called news.  Tales of government.

So, while I spent a week sleeping under my bed in a lead blanket, awaiting attack from N. Korea, the story suddenly vanished.  Instead, I get to read that a second rate, yet pro, basketball player decided to become famous by announcing he's gay.  It was a shock to his ex-girlfriend.  Now he's famous.

But what happened to N. Korea?  Any word about that Libyan thing when an ambassador got killed, along with some others?  Benghazi.  No more news there.

Maybe, they had a quick war of some kind and I missed it.  That was a very peculiar buildup considering it just vanished.

Not sure what's up here in CA, other than the bullet rain to nowhere, from nowhere, awarded the contract to one of our senator's husband.  No conflict of interest.  Diane Feinstein only does what's best.  I know because she says so.  She knows best and it is coincidence if her office tends to bring her and her cronies financial windfalls.

Are they smarter for knowing how to play the system and the serf mentality of the public?  Am I a fool for never figuring out how to do that?  Would I be happier if I played the game so I could get my slice of public money?  Not really public--they had to take it off of someone.

Today, I think I've been all wrong about everything, for as long as I remember, almost.   Still, I can't help wondering what's up with being threatened with nukes, then no more news about it.