For the Wrong Reasons, Fortunately

Suffice it to say I've been a vegetarian all my life.  I am not saving the planet by doing so.  The sight of a steak does not make me queazy.

Apparently such sentiments are not always felt by nouveau-vegetarians and vegans.  They are as redneck in their way as the ones who get all riled up if you don't eat meat.  "Goddam vegetarian #$%^&*ies."

People can sense that I don't want to discuss it, so the jerky ones always have to bring it up.  It has always felt like having little freakshow moment.  I don't make a scene at restaurants, or do any of that stupid stuff some idiot vegetarians do.

Maybe all their self righteous reasons are the wrong ones.

Oh no.  I thought I was in this racket for the wrong reasons.  The non-carnivore racket.

Got nothing against hunting, beasts of burden, ranching, or leather goods.  I don't care if you wear a fur coat from a polar bear.  So, obviously my reasons must be wrong because I don't care why I do what seems most suitable for me, and easiest.  I considered converting, but I wouldn't do it unless I was in a situation in which I had to.  The desire just is not there.

And I know this is way out of line, but I don't care what is good for you.  I especially do not care what kinds of meat, fish, and foul are deemed healthy or unhealthy.  It tends to vary anyway.

That this would come up is evidence that people can be beyond nuts, but there is no way that the planet will be saved from anything if everyone quits eating the way they like.   Geez, save the lectures for lions and coyotes.

The planet will survive.  Humans may or may not.  I think the species could survive, but only if we quit trying to cater the lowest common denominator.  You can be nice to a moron without running the world the way he would.

Eventually we'll all have to go save some other planet.  Not we, per se, but we humans, the species.  I have concluded I'm probably human, so I take such bold liberties.

We may even bring some cows and the like.  Horses have to be hauled to the new planet, although there may be some ridable flying mammals on the planet which are more fun.  I'll never know unless there is some window for you to see after you kick the bucket.

Possibilities are endless.

The Wealthy and I

You wouldn't think I'd feel a kinship to "the rich".  I, myself, found this an odd thing until I saw the light.

The rich people, who have people like me doing jobs normal people don't know exist, abhor manual labor.  Much of their existence and money are devoted to measures designed to insulate them from doing anything remotely resembling manual labor.

I, too, find manual labor less than fun the majority of the time.  That is because I'm a rich man locked in a not so rich man's life.  I'm trans financial.  So, if the country club sets membership conditions I can't meet, I'll sue them because, inside, I'm really a rich man.  Discrimination against trans-financials must be illegal.  If not, I'll start a movement.  Maybe a million trans-financial march.

I'm going to change my name to reflect the real me.  Instead of John0, it will be F. John0 IV.

Privilege vs Right

Really, if it makes us safer, aren't you willing to endure inconvenience and interrogation here and there?  Things like random road blocks, retention of private information in various forms, etc.

If you aren't a bad guy, there is nothing to worry about.  Let them search!

Does anyone still believe that?

The paperwork of existence is becoming something akin to a license to exist.  And we've all been bombarded with the idea that "driving is a privilege", therefore you need permission from the state to do it.   It clearly follows that, whether it has been directly labeled, a license to live in this country definitely exists in the form of a collection of necessary documents, licenses, behaviors, etc.

So, living, like driving, is a privilege granted by the state.   Like driving, living is not something that is done well by the majority.  I do not rate that according to wealth.  Just like an expensive car does not necessarily mean a good driver.  A new Dodge truck certainly doesn't seem to create drivers who are fun on the freeway.  Always the Dodge, I swear.

But, more on topic, the problem with the idea that a right is granted, therefore a privilege, is that it totally depends upon the character of those in charge in government to ensure that power is not abused. You don't give strangers keys to house, a loaded gun, etc. and then wonder what went wrong.

Yet, collectively, that is exactly what our population has done.  Oh we just need to give the key to right thugs to keep us safe and worry about our needs.  That's how it is.  If people do not really think that, you would never know it, judging from the degree of control and force we endure and allow, and pay for through taxes and inflation.

Rights are not things that rely on the resources of others, or their permission and approval.

Rights do rely on others respecting your space, person, and property.  It's the same now as it would be if we all found ourselves on a virgin planet.  Not to be confused with a planet full of virgins.

We're in the woods and have to survive.  You gravitate toward some people and away from others.  No one specifically owes anyone anything.  There is no question that some people will start trying to play leader.  Priestly types will emerge and plenty of people will follow the self styled leader and the priest because they like to be told what to do, and feel good in a large group of other followers.

That is a real pain for the independent types, minding their own business, because the majority can pillage the minority in any number of ways.

But prior to leaders managing to muck it up too much, you know your right to live is as solid as anyone's.  Your ability to survive may not be.  But you have a right to try, and you will probably do OK.  Some will do better.  It is not your right to decide that they need to do something for you.

Just because you can't demand something from someone does not mean that person can't offer you whatever it is you need or want.   The more you force people the less personally charitable they seem to become.  I have no stats.  I just notice that people are very generous when it is not directly coming from them.  Not always so much when it comes to helping a friend or neighbor.

When you think about it, even acts of charity have been directed and controlled, and set up to be subjected to approval.  Buying your nearly homeless neighbor's kids new shoes or clothes is not an official charity.  To deduct it you would have to divulge info on the neighbor, at the very least.  I'm not sure you can even do that.

There should be no charity deduction.  Just cut the rates by 10% across the board.  After awhile people might pick up the slack on their own.  Totally inappropriate and corrupt tax system.  It is wrong.    They try to convince our own population that those among us who view a tax supported agency as abusive, dishonest, corrupt, inconsistent and confusing are terrorists of some kind.   Wrong.

Maybe Bob Filner will eventually end up as head of Homeland security.  If they elect me president I may appoint him head of that outfit.  That is while we are shutting it down.  Of course, I'd probably have a Bolshevik congress, so I'd have to settle for vetoing 90% or more of the bills they pass.  My guess is that I wouldn't last very long in that job.  They'd either shoot me or set me up somehow and impeach me, or who knows what.

And the concubine who lives there with me better not start some dumb ass campaign that has anything to do with telling anyone what to do and how to live,   That would be a deal killer.  I'd have to drop her off in the alley where we met.

People see things differently.  Sometimes the same set of facts leads to a different conclusion.  Usually they are wrong.  This is why I think it took so long for toilet paper to become an available commodity.  No question someone had the idea and everyone said he/she was a witch and they made a bonfire out of the toilet paper inventor.  Why?  Because people are not all that bright and lack foresight.  Some can't help it, and some don't want to.

Disturbing Ad

Fortunately, I don't see too many advertisements of the TV variety.  Hulu is not ad free, so I catch a few here and there.

They have a new one for Mr.Clean.  He used to just be a badass.  And you always wondered what was up with him home alone with a variety of housewives.

I don't know what happened in his life over the years, but Mr. Clean is now clearly gay.  I'll bet all the husbands decided it was alright for him to hang out with the women, alone, one on one--because they say he's gay.  We know what's what.

I don't care what that makes me.  Mr Clean was supposed to be a badass, who proved that even tough guys can shine chrome and porcelain, while swooning babes shamelessly lead him to the bedroom to see what he can clean in there..  He was the type of guy you trust to steer you right on cleaning chemicals, but not the type you trust in any other context.

Is it true he did time for manslaughter?

If memory serves he was cleaning up the crime scene when the cops arrived.   On the way to the station he cleaned the back seat and headliner of the police car.   That was one clean prison by the time he was granted parole.  He did get time off for good behavior.

I would never have guessed Mr Clean was a gay felon.  Or any kind of felon.  I thought he was just a weird clean-freak badass, that I wouldn't trust most of the time.  This may be an act to boost sales or divert attention from the manslaughter thing.  He was even hitting on some other cartoon man in the commercial.  Clean is a cad of some kind.

Mr Clean is not a name you can trust, but you can probably do alright with his cleaning formula.

Un Be F'ing Lievable: part 852013

Perhaps you are one of those who actually held an Obamacare party.  No offense, but WTF?   I cannot relate.

I did notice that those quoted in the article I read al talked about what they are getting.   I'm not sure that those people understand the source of these things.  They think it is Obama, who exempted many Congressional type employees from various requirements of the law, personally bestowing gifts upon them.  In a way they are right; like when gangsters show generosity in the neighborhood..

A stranger thing, I can hardly imagine.  You celebrate the birthday of a politician by throwing a party to sell your unconscious neighbors on the wonders of a law that has nothing to do with people doing something wrong, but with forcing purchases and compliance.  Not to mention the other little power grabs and stupid spending incorporated in the 3000 page aberration against individuals who like to mind their own business.

(if people liked the law and methods of implementation, why do they have to go around campaigning, trying to sell you on the wonder of it all?  It isn't a good con if it doesn't sound good to the mark.  By definition, one might say.)

Those must have been really fun parties.  Yay!  I'm on mom's insurance until I'm 26, but mom can't afford her insurance anymore.  Just one of those odd cases.  Gonna throw a bolshevik party, ya gotta crack some eggs.  Or has that got to do with omelets? Anyway.  I guess no one on Ballistic mountain chose to jump on that bandwagon.  I would have heard it echoing in the canyon.

These people are serious about their icon worship, and about promoting any intrusive, divisive nonsense he and his pals scheme.   It can only be some kind of envy and hatred, I think.

Maybe not.  Some people lionized FDR, and still do.  The same with Reagan, Kennedy, etc.  The point is, a significant number of people are strongly compelled to embrace the idea of being a subject of some bigger than life person.  

Class warfare has been played a lot. 99%, 1%.  Love 'em, hate 'em.  I don't know how the dividing line works.  Must be a lot of gerrymandering involved since Obama and many others fueling these things are wealthy and wield lots of power.  If mainstream America is really advertising their desire to be subservient and to please, I must be in the 1%.

We've neve outgrown the old feudal system,  an, like with lots of things, the memory of it has grown rosier than the reality.  People forgot that they did not like being abused by kings that much.  Now they clamor for some royal figure to idolize with a blind zeal that is normally seen in radical religious cults.

I'm incredulous.  There are things that seem way off to me, but to some people those things are holy and cannot be discussed in other than a worshipful, praising manner.

I suppose if they abolished the irs, there would be parties.  I wouldn't go, but I'd be very happy about it.

People are nuts, but I still prefer them to bears.

Still a Slight Mystery

The wedding couple, whose wedding celebration started at 630, but at 830 they still had not arrived,  did not fall into a well or sink hole.  They showed up at 9, thirty minutes after a few others and I left the building.  It is still very weird.  None of the Mormons seem to think it is nuts, yet when it is mentioned they sigh, "yea I guess that is ..." then they fade out.  I'm not sure some of them aren't hypnotized.  They are due at 6:30 and even have a little agenda laid out on the invitation. I don't get it.

It could still be true that the consummation issue wasn't resolved until just before they arrived at their party.  That theory has yet to be shot down.  I don't know how to tactfully research the matter, so I am going on the assumption that the reason for the no show at the party was that they just couldn't quite get that consummation thing done.

And, obviously, you can't do the stuff out of order, it's--marry--bang--party-- or you go to some bad place.  Or the whole congregation beats you silly.  I would hope that is how it works.  It is only right.

I can merely guess based on the evidence I have, so it is possible that none of the above is true except for direct observations such as when I left, and factual information from reliable sources such as that the couple is alive and arrived about 9 PM--technically hearsay (often spelled "heresay by the AP).
  

Sneaky Email, etc.

An email arrived which pretended to be from DHL.  I think the subject said, "Order Shipped", and it looked all DHL with the colorful logo and such.  They claimed the attempted delivery but no one was home.

A tracking number was listed, which was link that tried to get you to download a thing that you then have to open.  They also had just that in the email body as well.

Just prior to the final step I noticed the files were .exe and that is not a good thing to open unless you know what it does and that you want that.  I trashed it, then went to the DHL site.  They had a warning about this email.  I noticed it off to the right after entering the bogus tracking number.  DHL aid that was not a legit tracking number.

No big surprise because I didn't order anything.  Of course, I never discount the possibility of an unexpected package from friend or foe.  I have told friend and family, repeatedly, just end it via US post office to the PO Box, but one person always tries to end wild stuff UPS.

I worked for UPS for a short few months in Greensboro.  They have a hub there.  Most dangerous facility since my dad's backyard speargun factory where all the labor was done by kid from 6 to 18.   I did it all by the time I was 18.  Sometimes I'd hire a friend to help.  Only one or two of my friends from grade school on were capable of doing the work and doing it as long a it took to get the job done.

So, for 80% of the time between age 15 and 18 I did it all.  Not that this is relevant to the topic, other than that would be illegal now.  It was not a happy time or a happy place, but it could have been.  In any case, even now I would oppose any intrusion by the state on such an operation.

In their exuberance, the state can often mistake a jerk for a hard core abuser.  By doing this, the kid gets none of the redeeming value the jerk has to offer.  Only the jerk part.  I'm glad I was able to come away with something more than just a jerk parent.    I just wish I had not somehow become the sponge for all the sadness in the family, not of my making.  It is a if I subconsciously thought I could take the sadness away and put it all in me so everyone would be OK.  Except me, but that didn't matter.

I have yet to permanently shake the sadness, or the low evaluation of my worth.  It comes and goes.

get drunk on beer when nursing children

Anyway, that UPS place appeared to have been designed by someone who forgot to account for the fact that human beings would be working there.  There were cool conveyor belt highways that resembled big city overpasses with bridges over bridges over bridges.  They had stations up there where people did tasks unknown to me; until one of the highways had a pile up.

A box would get off to the side and snag on something, and pretty soon boxes pile up and even fall off, down on a road going elsewhere.  The solution?  Someone would leave the task unknown to me, get behind the jam, brace himself and kick the boxes.  Many reached the bottom looking like accordions.

The drivers for UPS are not like that.  They have high demands put on them, but they don't just throw packages at your door as they pass to make up time.  In the hub they do the equivalent of that in a myriad of ways.

I knew owners of very small manufacturing operations who were harassed by state OSHA agencies for not having an exit sign above the only door out of a one room building.  small building.  More than one case of similar nitpicking nonsense.  These were well run, safe places.  The last thing the owners of these firms needed was for employees to get hurt.   Not profitable, not in their self interest.

The number of hazards at the freight hub was huge.  It is clear that those who have the big bucks to help campaigns and participate in government/business partnerships are not held to the same standard.

That was long ago.  I'm sure it has all been cleaned up now.  Corruption and dishonesty in institutions funded by tax money collected at gunpoint is a thing of the past.

I love this San Diego mayor.  He's the best thing since Sergio in Miami a little over 20 years ago.  That is hard to do.  Sergio was county manager, I think. They had this county wide sort of government.  Metro-Dade.  The usual issues resulted from too much centralization.  But, par for the course, they think the answer is more of the same which caused the problem.

Sergio and his city hall cohorts got busted for regularly buying stolen suits and other high end clothes from somebody in a truck who would meet them at some fairly regular time.  Often the original store tags were still there.  The store that either got ripped off, or their shipment got stolen.

Serg and the gang prided themselves on dressing well.  How could they know someone doing retail designer-wear business out of the back of a truck in back alleys may be a crook?  The Hiassen commentaries in the Miami Herald at the time were indescribably funny and on the mark.  It mad it fun to live in Miami for that period.

Cliff has been playing a song I wrote--No More Mr Nice Guy.  I wrote it in Memphis but would not let that band have it because of the way things were done.  I'm surprised that it gets such a good reception.  It is a silly song and not something I'd think was good.

Here's the chorus of the song:  no more mr nice guy, no more mr easy, call me mr spice guy, call me mr sleazy.

The rest of the song talks about this guy's wife or girlfriend who was happy until she started watching Oprah and Dr Phil.   I think it was actually a magazine cover that triggered the thought, though.  She hears things like, "Is your love life stagnating?", etc.   And they have all these ideas for "spicing up life in the bedroom".  None of it stuff she or her husband do----(because it is probably STOOPITT)--and even though she's happy, she's convinced she must really be lacking.  Got to watch out for those who make money off of people's problems.  They will often lead you to believe you have a problem when you don't.

The song is not an opinion narrative like the above.  Maybe that is why it works.   I don't remember all the words. It is somehow rewarding to play on song you wrote, but the singer knows it far better than you.

So, in the song, he's trying to keep the woman happy.  I wish him the best of luck.

New Theory for Mystery in post Below

Not knowing how the workings of that faith operate, other than that they multiply like rabbits,  I can only guess at ritual and dogma.

I'm thinking the way it works is that things Must be done in this order: a-get married, b-consummate marriage, c-have the hooplah celebration in the church basketball arena.  That is why they marry one night, do the party the next.

What if, for whatever reason, they tried all night and all day but just couldn't get the dang thing consummated?   They can't be doing things out of order.  It explains everything.

Maybe people looked unworried because, after 3 or 4 hours, the couple shows up and the brethren and sisteren help them get this consummation business accomplished.  They may look straight arrow, but those folks love sex.  I can tell.

California Dreaming, part 7262013

One of the big surprises for me, here in sunny SoCal, was the big churchy aspect.  I encountered nothing like this in the South, and they have churches everywhere, but they are often smaller, some the size of a small barn or taco stand.

San Diego county houses maybe a billion Mormons, and big showings for Seventh Day Adventists and some Caledonian thing--they be somewhat foreign--and who knows what other group that would probably piss off the Baptists down south.

I played a little music with a Mormon guy over the last couple of years.  I even played for a Mormon event at a Mormon church--or whatever term they use, if not church.

So, that guy was marrying the girl singer, also a Mormon.  Mormonette, if you will.  You won't?  Yea, guess not.

Apparently they do the church stuff and actually get married the night before.  That is what they did.  Then they have like a reception-party thing the next night.  At a mormon place.   All their places have a very nice indoor basketball court, which also serves as a banquet hall, dance hall, etc., as needs be.  At the end of all of them is a first class stage, complete with curtain.

So, I was invited to the reception, as was the bass player who had played with us.  He gave up on that group at same time I did.  We figured we were the only non-mormon infidels in the place.  We were concerned about the possibility of a sacrificial ceremony.  We were concerned that we might be the martyrs of the event.

As it turned out we sat around with a Mormon lady that we know, sampled the buffet, sat around some more.  The invitation said it started at 6:30, then at 8 there was to be a ring exchange---I thought you did that when you got married.

It doesn't matter.  They never showed up.  Family and friends had that place looking like a mild Las Vegas.  Lights, glitz.  Nothing.

People sat around the tables and talked because they all know one another.  Some recorded music was being played.  Actually a good selection for what was at hand.

Everyone appeared to believe that the newlywed couple--marriage 2 or 3 for him, 2 for her--was still alive and hadn't fallen into a well, as I posited.

At nearly 8pm, the guy playing dj, announced the couple's phone numbers and suggested barraging them with calls and texts.  I didn't hear if any answers were received.

I left at close to 830.  Not to show to your own party is a bit odd.  He was going to play music and wanted the bass and I to play, was my understanding.  The erratic degree of reliability involved with the couple, particularly the groom,  has those people conditioned to assume it is due to irresponsibility so I'll bet it will be some time before family church people start looking at wells to see if they fell in.

If they find this couple in a well, I'll tell them 'I told you so'.   Every encounter I've had with this guy and his world has left me wondering how reality works in that dimension.  Nothing ever makes sense, and it is never quite a represented, but then the representation rarely makes sense either.  Not showing up to something they know family and friends worked very hard to set up has to be for good reason.

Maybe they know something I don't.  Maybe I'll find out tomorrow that they were abducted by aliens, or sent to gitmo to make us safe.

Whatever the case, I think 2 hours is a large enough window of time to allow for ADD, lack of awareness, and the need to be fashionably late.  This guy is overly absent minded and quick to shift his attention in an almost randomly chaotic fashion.  So, he could easily be walking along looking at something shiny, over there, and fall into a hole, or well, dragging his new wife along.

A mystery to be solved, though I think the truth is that they just showed up late for some complicated reason that would only happen to them.  That is the MO.  Just not sure.

It Won't Matter When I'm Gone

The ever present attack of personal liberty and choice has been going on since before God was helping people win battle with the jawbone of an ass.  Things have evolved to the point where the thing is run by the brains of asses.

But, it won't matter if a speeding bus takes me out tomorrow.  So, why do I even care?   I do not know.

The fact that people are mean and stupid will not change in my life.  That assertion is backed by the support given to agencies, which intrude on lives and terrorize citizens, by the citizens themselves, and their alleged representatives.

It is bizarre.   The IRS thing should have led to its demise, but no, it becomes dem and rep establishment vs tea party if you read Huffington post.  The nature of the acts, and the principles involved mean nothing.  The IRS is purely the tool of bullies, is so far outside the law they don't even bother to pretend, yet those who point that out are deemed kooks.  Collectivism is like that.  Centralized control quickly becomes arbitrarily uneven and abusive.

The 911 pretense still prevails in matters of surveillance and national security.  Had they acted upon intelligence they had in hand prior to 911, on more than one front, it may have been prevented.  The unlawful collection of data on everyone is not a cure.  It is another weapon for those in power to ue against those who may not support those in power.  Yet, representatives and citizens seem perfectly OK with this all seeing arbiter of our lives.   At least enough of them so that the abuse of power by NSA won't be reigned in.

The whole thing is a very messy, very orchestrated play, which is so muddy and complex that many of the most vocal supporters of an all powerful state, in which we have privileges rather than rights, are unaware of the possibility they may one day be on the receiving end of the monster's wrath.  It is enough for them that, right now, their perceived enemies are hurt and don't like it.

People are shamelessly shallow.

Obama administration's assertion that Fast and Furious, Benghazi, IRS, NSA, etc. are "phony scandals" is only true in the context that all these things don't look good for the phonies being exposed.  They are not phony scandals.  They are symptoms of a society who sees government as their parent or God, and the answer to all ills, even those created by government.

If you think republicans are cool, check the split on the vote to defund NSA over reach.   Interesting that strong numbers in both parties were willing to reign in this abomination, but for once in our lives, more democrats wanted to cut funding to this agency.

If you think democrats are cool, I'm sorry for you.  Both the dem and rep establishments are immoral, lying, abominations.

Both parties were fairly well split on the issue.  Some went through dramatic speeches about 911 to justify trading freedom for an invasive government.  The trouble is, proof of anything being claimed is tough to prove or disprove.   For one thing, you cannot actually prove how many lives have been saved or snuffed, even though they spout figures and statistics.   Can't really prove it.

How much of this global threat we all must fear to the point of giving up our autonomy is the result of a hundred years worth of bad foreign policy?  Or just the erroneous notion that God wants the USA to run around the world "spreading democracy" at gun point?   We aren't supposed to spread anything.

Oh well.  I don't really care that much.  I think the obvious mistake of how things are run and people bullied by the state just adds to my mounting personal fears.   I'm so tired of being on the edge, in a fog, and in painful solitary that I don't dare own a pistol, although I am for very loose gun laws.  Maybe even for no gun laws.  The ones in place do little to protect the innocent.  Just look at the place with strict laws.   They either get violent in other ways or shoot each other regardless of law.

You are safer in most parts of the US than you are in Britain when it comes to violent crime.  A a matter of fact, if you take a few of the craziest cities out of the mix, you are safer here than in most of the world.

Not going to change any of that.  So, what do I do while I wait for my last breath?  I don't know.  Not every day do I wake up glad to wake up.  Living being should have a bit of a better outlook than that.  I am tired of it.  I blew it and I can't shake the disappointment, regret and, sometimes, horror that brings.

I'll continue pretending so my family will never know the real deal.  I owe them that.

The ultimate answer may be to drink the koolaid, and become another mindless fool following one or another of these parties or movements.  

Is it because I am white that women act nervous when I show up in an empty parking garage where they are exiting or entering their cars?   Our buddy who saved Guam from capsizing, Rep Hank Johnson, is sure it only happens to black men because we all hate them, and crime statistics in no way indicate that you are more likely to be mugged by a particular age and gender specification of a particular race.

I never discriminate like that. I hide from everyone.

Is it normal that police accused me of a robbery I didn't commit, cornered me in a diner about some bank that jut got robbed, threw me against a wall a few times for poor performance of a breathalyzer test, made me follow a pen in circles and figure 8's for fun when I'd done nothing wrong and hadn't had a drink for more than 20 years,  stopped me in my driveway, blocking me in with five cop cars, searched my car, didn't give an excuse for over an hour, then it was a lie,  stopped me about five different times for no reason then trumped one up and finally took off,  gave me a speeding ticket instead of the person in front of me who was really speeding, gave me a ticket for turning my lights on at night?   Is all this because I am white?

If I were black I'd be sure that every unexplained abuse by employers, police and women who broke my heart was all due to race.   It is not, and what they are promoting now is only half truths and outright lies.  Another shameful Obama ploy to divide.

Oh, and I have been scoped out in department stores and elsewhere.  If I walked in acting thuggish, I'd expect it.  I expected it in the old days when I was with friends who did not know how to act.

I'm a victim too.  I want laws tailored to me, and I want to go stop traffic and break things to prove I'm a victim.

I am no fan of law enforcement in most cases, but mostly because of the laws themselves, and the methods used to enforce laws.  Sting operation are 90% entrapment schemes and wrong.  Roadblocks and random stops are just wrong.  I could go on. But I already went on too long.  In many ways