For those who don't know these things, a griece is a grand niece, girl children of your nephews or nieces. I all of a sudden have three. Or so it seems at Christmas since there was only one to consider last year.
I read reviews and descriptions of things and examined the graphs which showed the item's general appeal by age group and gender. Amazing the number of things that rate way up there with 3 year olds of one sex but have little appeal to the other. Even in the one and two year old range.
I think maybe we're coming full circle in that the empirical evidence shows that boys and girls are not generally drawn to the same things so much. Of course, there are individual variations but the trends are hard to refute. It is not just conditioning.
After all it has been politically incorrect to acknowledge the differences for many years now, so the only real conditioning have been the attempts to de-male boys and butch up girls. Some of which is well motivated. Much of which is really deep seated resentment of one sex or the other being played out through unsuspecting children. They are tough. One day maybe balance and sanity will prevail.
I'm satisfied with what I ordered. Most likely either parent or child or both will find the stuff worthwhile. I did have the things sent to their respective houses so they won't have to cart more stuff back on airplanes. Traveling with six month old kids and a three year old in today's insane TSA terrorized airports is enough trouble.
I did not really get ultra girly stuff. I got something for the basket cases which has great reviews and doesn't make noises. Tobbles or something like that. Kids stack them, roll them chew on them and it seems to be a hit. Who knew? I did get the three year old a sort of kite thing that girls apparently like much more than boys. It is colorful fabric resembling a butterfly; allegedly.
She also got kid binoculars designed by a mommy scientist for her own brat. Looked almost fool poof. Oh, and she also got a stomp rocket! It uses pneumatics to send a soft rocket up fifty or a hundred feet. I figure someone has to give her stuff like that. Plus girls like those things almost as much as boys.
When there is a barely house trained kid in the same house with a basket case, and you haven't been around them enough to fully know their personalities, it pays to consider avoiding things which one might use to kill, maim, or merely terrorize the weaker sibling. I believe all second children should be given tasers or stun guns, early on, just to even things up a bit. In most homes parents fail to train the eldest not to be obnoxious thugs in dealing with the new kid at the dinner table.
As a matter of fact most parents seem to be as oblivious to the reality of children as public school teachers and administrators. Say what you will, but the vast majority of such self-proclaimed educators take the concept of obliviot (oblivious idiot) to levels which appear purely sadistic to those with the ability to pay attention. No, I am not a big fan of public education as we know it, and as I experienced it.
That's OK. None of those people are on my Christmas list. Oddly, some first-borns are. They usually reserve their joyous demeaning for their own kin, so the rest of the world is safe from their self aggrandizing antics. Sometimes they are the only ones in their families who ended up not going nuts or just giving up. Good argument for the one child approach to forming a family. Not the forced one-child approach; because there are cultures that don't value their girl babies so much in that environment.
I'll spend hours on something like trying to figure out a gift. There have only been a few people that for some reason I found nearly impossible to satisfactorily bestow a gift upon. In my own family, my father was the only one. He just didn't get it, regardless. I think those who can't grasp the symbolism of a gift, and who see giving a gift as a chore rather than a statement of some kind, never enjoy giving or receiving. The intent and affection of the giver means zilch, even if they are the (reluctant) giver. I grew to pity my father for that. He must have found life as difficult in his way as I do in mine, albeit in much different ways.
If I can't afford to get something, I don't. Many Christmases and birthdays have passed which received only my best wishes but not anything material. Anyone who can't cheerfully accept that is not worth consideration when the means are there to do more.
Nothing is worse than searching out some really nice valuable, enduring items only to notice that the recipient is in no way pleased. I have cast more than pearls before swine a time or two. Among such figurative pearls--diamonds, and gold. And else. Only a couple of times has it happened. Not talking even remotely gaudy or in bad or questionable taste. But, some people are the type who'd rather get a gift card or a chunk of cash than any gesture that I think is special and personal. They don't get it. No win friends. Probably nothing would have worked out.
I may never be in a situation like that again anyway. Kind of sad, but that is how it is. Any more it is by choice. I see the red flags too soon and too often. It happens when you've been around the block enough to believe that no company is better than bad company or company without respect.
It is an odd feeling to look at my life and realize that I have received far more love than I have respect. I think a person can have one without the other. I prefer both. Love without respect is most likely a form of pity. It doesn't feel that great when you recognize it.
Friday, December 6, 2013
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- John0 Juanderlust
- Ballistic Mountain, CA, United States
- Like spring on a summer's day
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