What Doesn't Kill You Just Means We Can't Remove You From Our Files

So, I'm thinking to myself, "Holy smoke!! It feels like someone installed a piece of 1/2" galvanized gas pipe behind my sternum, and they keep turning the fire up and down at random.   Please let's avoid any emergency room over reaction."

So, I do the right thing and all is bearable.  I call the alleged expert the next day.  The crackerjack office lady, maybe a nurse, says, "Oh he isn't here, I'll leave a note and maybe tomorrow you'll get a call from him."

What?  I just told you I am trying to find out something I can do to avoid drastic action.  Uh huh.  Well, he'll be in tomorrow and maybe call tomorrow afternoon.

I am convinced I am losing my mind.  People seem to be saying things to me which do not fit the context.  Especially medical people.  But then there was also the visa lady of no known first language.

I'm hope it is not just me, but if I am to go by numbers and the ever conclusive deal closer, "that many people can't all be wrong", it must be me.   I'm screwed.  So crazy I don't know I'm nuts.

Then there is the insurance deal.  On their site I do the "contact us" thing and send an email because they list about 10 top specialists who do not do business with them.  Will not accept that insurance, period.  I opted for the plan I have specifically because of one of the people listed.  Turns out he doesn't take this plan.

The insurance company replies about how there are issues with doctors and "the exchange", and confusion about what is and is not part of "the exchange".  Exchange this Mo..Fo.  Then they say what I ought to do is go to their site---I was on their site, logged in, and the email is internal to their site---and search the list of providers under my plan.

What?  Go do what I did before, but which did not work, and that is why I sent you a jmessage, and are you just playing with me, do you hate people and want me to die, or are you a new century moron with no sense of empathy, logic and compassion?   WTf'ingF?

I replied with, "What an odd reply.  You just suggested I refer to a list to find a physician in response to me informing you that the list is bogus and cost me much trouble.  Well, I do thank you for your insight into this matter, and concerned reply.  Best regards,  [my name here]

Here's the real problem: I have been more out of the mainstream than most for many years.  I'm not used to bureaucracy on the scale that has become normal to most people.  My brushes with the self titled healthcare industry are changing that.  My weakness is that I can't get used to it and have almost no temper control in the face of the absurd.  Especially when it involves officialdom.

I have to show ID to let these butt diving bastards do their thing, like I'm going to crash someone else's colonoscopy or spinal tap.  Do not need it to vote or use my credit card-9 times out of 10.  That is the level of reason you get when things are over-controlled from a centralized governing authority. It never ever fails.

Hence my Centralization theory of systems, which I described years ago, complete with a colorful graph.  You paid no attention so I won't repost it.  It holds true of social governing systems mechanical systems, just about all things.

Anyway, the expert reminded me of that internet advertisement where someone is calling about lack of service and the guy finally says, "you need to call someone about that!!"  Oh, maybe blabla and see and ear nose throat, etc.  No no no.

I'm seeing plenty enough people. We are not adding to it.  Everything is somehow related to that area with the 1/2" pipe.  No more need to go up my backside or make movies in the stomach.  I guess the other stuff, maybe I cannot explain.  But I still think it is related.

I'm told we have two separate things going on.  Maybe.  But I know I am a better trouble shooter than 99% of everyone, doctors or not, given the same information.  It is the main thing I have going.  But I cannot apply it because I cannot usually articulate my process, and rarely do people give you the information you need.  They dislike being questioned.  And the medical profession dislikes you having the audacity to form an opinion of your own without their approval.

I should have been a doctor, pilot, lawyer, all the professions that demand some brains and an insufferable ego which insists you are superior to all who are unlike yourself.  I think I'm superior, potentially, to most all of them.  So you see why I could be comfortable in a field that demands unreasonable ego and view of one's worth.

I've found my ego bumping against that of a doctor or two.  I ended up winning in the end.  Question me like I do not know what I'm talking about?  They learn.  I just want this scavenger hunt to be over.

Mostly, it really is.  But even then you have to do certain things.  They have another thing in mind on one of the issues that I am going to decline. I just think it unnecessary.  The need to look at the gas pipe.  It is the kind in fireplaces.  Don't go looking elsewhere.  No need.  I live here.  I know what is what.

It gets old being both tired and angry.  I'm not always angry though.  I'm working on just being calmly abrasive rather than passionately angry.