Frugal Envy

Over at CF's I was reading the last installment of her Hoe escapades. For the Jerry Springer generation, a hoe is actually a garden tool, and a ho is actually the word whore uttered by the inarticulate and/or ignorant. Sorry, facts are facts.

Sayings like "A tough row to hoe" came out of agrarian culture not baby daddy woes with the law and relationship issues. Bit of history there. Sad, but I lived long enough to be exposed to both modes of dialog. Otherwise, I'm not that much of a resource on anthropology or history of people. Then again, in today's world my little bit of historical knowledge is probably above average.

Be that as may, and who cares about what I think I know? So, after reading about this insistence that the broken, second hand hoe, bought around the corner from where I used to live in Memphis, just had to be repaired and any thought of shelling out 10 or 20 dollars for a new one was unacceptable, I found myself profoundly and sincerely envious.

I'm the type that if I had $40.00 to my name would have gone and found a cheap new hoe (or ho, possibly) for $20 or less, come home turned some dirt and been done with it. It could be why I am always po. Po is from the same lexicon as ho. To be a po ho must be a sad condition. Actually, in a sense I've felt like a po ho a time or two.

Anyway, I wish I knew when to hold 'em and when to shell 'em out. Usually the first place I don't spend is food. If I think money is tight, I starve. Yet I'd by some extra tool, drive to a pretty spot 40 miles away just to clear my muddled mind, etc. The smart thing is to buy the cheap food you can make yourself and be healthy--rice beans, etc. and change my own oil in the car rather than burn precious petrol. Earth be damned--I have yet to believe I contribute to climate whims or the "earth's fever". I have fairly fuel efficient transport because I hate to buy lots of gas, not out of the slightest sense that I am "doing something for the earth" or that such choices are in any stretch of the imagination, noble.

Back to the envy. I really do admire those who can find bargains, dress like a million bucks with startling finds at thrift shops, and just generally get it right. My luck with bargains is rarely good. I do OK on my car purchases but never on bargain clothes. My impatience often leads me to buy a hoe, (not ho--really!!) when a clever person would figure out it is a Craftsman and maybe Sears will replace it like they do all Craftsman tools when they break. I did that only one time in my life, as a kid, with a socket wrench, the ratchet thing, 3/8".

On a day like today, it tweaks my jealousy nerve when someone has the ability and gumption to keep their money instead of giving up and giving it away. Of course she'd still be trying to fix the thing with band aids and tooth picks if she hadn't married the wiz kid who knows the craftsman tool pledge.