They Must Have All Settled or Plea Bargained

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Chances are I would have let them all walk, and not tolerated any sissy, frivolous, politically correct lawsuit. Torts, we in the trade call it. Torts aren't always BS, however they have grown to be that in way too many cases. Like the people who get a tax deductible non-profit because "The Earth Needs a Good Lawyer". Oh yea, like WTF? Is it because Japan and Haiti are suing for damages?

Anyway, my name wasn't called so I was able to leave at noon. Not many names were called. I guess it was luck of the draw.

I owe it to El Cajon to say that everyone running this operation was very good natured and competent, and the general facilities were better than expected. Most of the cops I saw were from the sheriff's dept., no Highway Patrol. Don't let that old, lame program CHiPs fool you. They are not that cool, or even that goofy. Hardened criminals.

What is with the entertainment industry that cops are considered neat-o? Does the public not realize that we have more people in prison than just about every other country? It makes no sense. Is it really thrilling to see cops manhandle down and out druggies, vagrants, and misfits? That is sick.

I took a photo (top of page+++) of the judge who gave a speech after our TV orientation show. At first I think many of the people thought he was joking. This guy was a piece of work. I'd have been freaked to be defending myself in his court. He moved like an aging robot, and spoke with a screech, kind of like a cross between Andy Devine and Gilbert Gottfried, with a touch of Walter Brennan thrown in.

If those references are too distant or unknown to you, picture a six foot 2x4 with a mustache, glasses, arms and legs, nailed to the floor so it is perfectly vertical screeching loudly into a microphone about how lucky we are to be in America, and how he has been in the legal system (on tax dollars) all of his life. He's been a judge for 20 years. I'm not disagreeing about being lucky to be here. He seemed to feel lucky because he was The Judge and had never had a private sector job. Prosecutor and judge. I feared he may have seen his job as being the guy to be sure jail space wasn't wasted. Who knows. I wasn't picked.

Talk about adding insult to injury--can you imagine being sentenced by a board wearing a suit, with the vocal chords of a rooster on steroids, blasting at you on a decibal level just shy of ear bleed?

Squawk squawk--you are sentenced-squawk squawk- to 90 years hard labor for painting your house without a permit-squawk squawk. Yikes!

I guess he got in the judge spot and at least knew not to run for senate or something. You think Ross Perot could have used some voice coaching. Seriously, he was like butter compared to judge Stiff-as-a-board.

Anyway they had paperbacks you could borrow or keep, so I am halfway through a Steven King novel I never heard of. It is not all scary and bizarre. I have never read him, so this is good. I wanted to experience his style. This is all dialogue, from one person. It is interesting enough. I take it back. It is a little bizarre. I like to see how people write who make big bucks, particularly if they hold my interest.

So, if you had a trial today, I am sorry they didn't pick me. I heard some girl at a nearby table in the courtyard, where I hung out for awhile, telling the two guys she was with, "Well the last time I got out of jail I was like seven months pregnant..." She went on to describe how she found a pipe and some kind of dope which sounded not like pot in a box in her stuff when she got home. I didn't catch the whole story or context. She was actually good looking, too.

The guys looked like jail hardened types. But they were not all punked out. There was a cold, kind of con man look to them. But nothing warm at all. They didn't seem angry or friendly or remorseful or scared. Just cold in a strange way.

Plenty of waddle pants punks waddling in and out of courtrooms. Why would you go to court with waddle pants and a sideways baseball cap? I might not have let them off even if they were innocent. OK. I would have, but I would have suggested someone beat them up just because.