Last Will and Testament: part 3813

Be it known, that whether I am killed by the CIA making me catch cancer, like the late Senor Chavez, or kick the bucket by other causes, known or unknown, if Jesse Jackson and/or Sean Penn show up at the funeral for any reason, just shoot me, then shoot them, or at least give them a good tazing.

In Jesse's case, I understand his fondness for Hugo;  Jesse is a thief and extortionist, much like Chavez.  They both pretend it is all for a good cause and betterment of the little people.

Don't cry for me, Venezuela.   But, please please please, can you just keep Jesse, Sean, and any of the other idiots who are there helping you grieve over your departed dictator?   If you will keep them, we will find some way to repay you.  We'll give you Ft Lauderdale, or Chicago, or maybe Connecticut.

Jesse mourns his pal, makes speech in Venezuela--overcome with grief

So, I don't know why anyone like that would come to my funeral, but just in case.  Actually, I don't think I will have a funeral.   I will go missing for quite some time, then just be declared tardy, or absent, and soon forgotten.  I'll leave no footprint.  You'll never know I was here.

If I am found, please burn the evidence and scatter my ashes over the naked thighs of beautiful virgins over the age of 18.  If none can be found, then just scatter me over the naked bodies of all those who rejected me, and those I rejected but shouldn't have.

Even so, I'd rather leave no mark than be remembered because I was part of the corrupt power structure of a nation or anything else.

Still, it is a shame to know you leave nothing of consequence or value.  It is a world of idiocy in which most of the rich and famous and powerful are negative examples of life, and evil doers--often because they haven't the ego control required not to become unbearably insane once they taste a bit of power and acclaim. .