420 and More Odd Harp Player At Large Foolishness

This probably doesn't happen to you, but it happens to me a lot.   I walk in a place where people know me, and at least one, often more over a span of time, will give a look of recognition then immediately mime like they are playing harmonica for a few seconds.   I don't play air guitar every time I see a guitar player.  I don't play air piano at Fin when we cross paths.

They always do it with a cheerful attitude, but it does get a little scary.  I guess I have to accept that people associate me with playing what I am not certain is even a real musical instrument.   I wonder what mime antics they'd employ were I known for being a proctologist, or gynecologist.

Oh well.  Wednesday night, at the last minute, I decided to show for the Parky's semi-blues jam/open mic.  I didn't have a great time the first time I explored that place.   This time was different.

I met new people and some hotshots had me sit in with them.  All was quite hospitable and ego boosting.  Even the regular bluesharp player there insisted that I must come back.   That was nice enough.

Now I have to play tonight at Cosmos in La Mesa.   What they call a stage is the size of a bath mat.   How the four of us will deal with that is yet to be seen.   I ought to have a better attitude, but Cosmos is one of those places where young yuppies in training, who fancy themselves intellectual go to be hip and to put on their best bored faces.

I'm probably being unfair, but there is a chance that I am not.   I did not want to play this.  The rest of the CopperCreek bunch did, so I piped down.  Such nice people--can't say no.  

We are filling in for whomever is the regular Saturday night act at this smug venue.  I used the word smarmy to describe them in the past, but I think the actually meaning of the word is a little off the mark.  It certainly sounds spot on for this crowd though.

I can only hope I am nowhere where people try to hijack tragedy by conducting moments of silence, etc.  I hate it when people play compassion commando, seeking attention with their pious manipulation of crowds and such.

Oh well.  Why let the bastards who forever try to take the fun out of life win?   I won't be overly cautious or safe.  And screw worrying about embarrassing myself or any of that.  How ridiculous.  People will mock anyone who is real and happy.  I have a history of fear of being laughed at so I spent much of life unhappy and not real, and no one laughed.  Worth it?   Hardly

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