What a Too Weird Life

Seriously, I know I complain too much about being a dimwit and doing it all wrong.  But I figured out I probably can't change.

It is like converting from non-carnivore to carnivore, I just cannot quite do it.  Or won't.  If your life depended upon it I would take a bite out of a live wildebeest.   But we are not in those circumstances.

It took from 8 A.M. until 4:47 P.M. to get the orthopedic appointment.   There is an ASAP referral in the system, which could mean anything, apparently.  I guess the world of healthcare is slammed busy.

Part of that is because people like the attention.  Part is because they feel bound to do something or give you something if you come in.  And if you get good stuff, then you will keep coming back.  I do not think it is intentional most of the time.  Doctors. for the most part, really want to help you out.  That is why it is hard for them to say, "you will be OK, get out of here."  They are human too so they do not generally enjoy not being liked, and they don't like uncomfortable conflict with patients.

You get some drip weasels like Dr Flores.  He must not have known just who I am.

Anyway, I was impatient and wondering if any calls worked, until they finally called back.  At 8, they said they's call right back.  At 1 they said they'd call right back.  Then I tried other numbers.  And the computer interface "myscripps".  So friendly.  Too bad it is highly unintuitive hard to navigate.  It proved a dead end for my purposes, except when the appointment was confirmed.

Apparently the voicemail I was shuffled to, once I reached the orthopedic group, did evoke a response.  Albeit at 4:47 P.M.

These experiences tell me I am going to be a really bad ward of the state.  No patience for it.  And as I age a bit my frontal lobes seem to atrophy==no filter.  They annoy past a point, I either walk out or ask something inappropriate and insulting.   I try not to do this.

It seems that ever since my mortality was brought to my attention, I tend to behave as if I am immortal.  Isn't that puzzling?  I guess it is a "what do you have to lose?" proposition.

Played a great night with my Texas people on Firday.  Valor and Lace, that's us.   Played until 2.  Someone trying to book us the weekend they leave.  We may do it.  He pulled out hundred dollar bills the other night to buy more time.  The barkeep didn't stop it.  We made double what we would have made.  And we eventually got a second wind.  I did.

They are really trying to get me to consider moving to the Austin area.   I told them my needs---some way to make money, and cheap but good lodging.  I do not think we have heard the end of it.  They are even saying I can stay with them.  I don't want to kill the friendship.

Besides, people have no idea how often and for how long I may be dry heaving loudly or something.  Expecting to improve it, but not looking for company that close to me.  At the same time, I need to push just beyond what I feel is comfortable.  That is because almost anyone can do a little better.  Me especially, even if I don't believe it.  Reality.

Now, the bone fella may just send me home with a wrapped hand or something.  Or of the scaphoid is in pieces, they probably have to screw it together.  You'd think they'd have a super glue type of material and just set and stick.  No foreign object. Nothing to take out later.  The trick is do not miss the correct alignment.  This is a tiny bone, relatively speaking.

It still sucks that about the best thing anyone will ever think I have done or can do is play harmonica. I have become much much better, by my measure of things, than I used to be.  Nothing compared to the real deal players, but good as a sideman.

But that is in no way the best of what I should be doing. It is all that's left so we cling to it.  Left handed, so as not to damage the right one further.  Anyway global warming will work the opposite for Texas in the future?  Heat is not my best friend at the moment.  Guess I better learn to adapt.