Sunday, May 9, 2010

Who Ray! Another Tour to Follow

You'd think I was the one escaping a bad situation, heading off with only a suitcase or two, and having no idea what comes next, but knowing it will be OK. Having friends at the end of the ride is a big deal. It is what saves your life sometimes.

I've had good fortune that way. I am glad my friend will get to experience what it is like when you are surrounded by kind people. When others treat you as if they see some value in your existence it can often bring you back to life if you've struggled to see the value in yourself. The kind of people who will beat you up if you mope too much make great friends.

To me, it is exciting when you are going from a place and life which had become unworkable, stagnant and otherwise not pleasant, and you realize that for now, your only home is right where you are--even if it is a bus seat for a day or two. No looking back, and so little defined ahead that there is no way to plan beyond the very basics. Someone is bound to be willing to pay you to do who knows what. That's the first thing. After that can be dealt with later.

Whether someone noticed this, or I noticed it myself, I am not sure, but I often think I feel more secure with less real security. It is likely just a phobia regarding being responsible; like having a house and major possessions. I guess it is all the rules and regulations for everything I most dislike. I can't keep up. That doesn't make me irresponsible, just born with an inordinate sense of entitlement to be free and autonomous.

Whatever that all means, I was happier than I would have expected to get a call from Mr. (name withheld) as he crossed into Arizona. Finally, he got out of that L.A. area which was so toxic under the circumstances. Unbelievably good people at the other end.

Another case of life turning in unexpected ways, with a little help. Maybe it was only unexpected by some. I wonder at my vicarious thrill as someone else travels cross country with almost nothing, ready to start from scratch. Something about that scenario is so American, or gypsy, not sure.

I'm happy and relieved. No one wants to hear that a friend is out in the global climate change with only a cardboard box. But hearing that a friend is heading toward a sort of rebirth and an adventure into the unknown is kind of cool.

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Ballistic Mountain, CA, United States
Like spring on a summer's day

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