Monday, April 28, 2014

Perhaps I Am Phobe

Rabies used to be associated with hydrophobia,  or maybe it was homophobia, heterophobia or islamaphobia.   I definitely suffer fro the latter.  Many overly gruesome and heavily uniformed religions trigger my aversion responses.

I'm most likely more rabid at this point as I have concluded the issue with which I am dealing, which is becoming impossible to live with, is probably a thing called aquagenic pruritis.   As dangerous as internet research can be, it can be useful.

And anymore, the Doctor, at your officially approved, government compliant black hole of health,  talks to you, leaves the room to go google what you discussed, then comes back with the search results.  They should loan the patient a computer so both of you can search.

 I say "black hole of health" because any health you had will get sucked out of you if you make many visits to a clinic or hospital.  You won't get better if it isn't a cut and dried circumstance like you're pregnant, or have a broken arm, or need to be sewed back together.

Aquagenic pruritis is not common but people do have it.  It leaves no marks unless you skin yourself alive to get at the sub-dermal horde of fire ants attacking you with crossbows, flamethrowers,  and shotguns full of tiny capsules of acid.  A monstrous army of nano soldiers who rape and pillage skin cells from the inside out.

After a shower it is so bad that grown men have been known to beg outloud for God to fix it.  They have been known to down every pill of any kind in hope of relief.  Grown men have paced back and forth for an hour, waiting for it to subside, and for all the pills to act.  Antihistamines sort of help, prednisone is best but it can take some time to fully mitigate the madness.

Cures are not likely as the aquagenic pruritis is probably a symptom of something else.  Maybe tiny creatures or bacteria.  Or renal failure or karma, or bad attitude and punishment from divine bullies.  All I know is that I may not get much medical help because they don't know, and it isn't on their quick list of things they can treat.   I'm rather disgusted with the whole medical setup.  But I have been for a long time.  And many of your favorite charities are just as disingenuous when it actually comes to true cures.

Perhaps we can all run around the block and wear T shirts proclaiming to the world that we are "doing our part" to find a cure for aquagenic pruritis.  Because we are sooo good and wonderful.  That'll fix it.

Personally I think something remotely akin to a unification theory for the body is the path to pursue.   Everything influences everything else, and it all has electrochemical signatures of some kind.  Things are wired in odd relationship.  That's why scratching an itch in one place sometimes soothes or annoys a nerve in another place on the body, seemingly unconnected to the first point.

This is a troubling time.  I'll have to figure out how to work things out.  If this can't be fixed at all, I will sign over the car, get rid of all my stuff and mess, and make a swift, invisible, clandestine exit.  It is that unworkable.

All the usual suggestions and thoughts have been addressed and considered; detergents, soaps, hot, cold, lotions, creams, foods.  They tested blood for food allergies and found none.  I'm fairly certain it is of internal origin.  Probably not enough of one thing or too much of another.

I may be rabid because when it comes to water in the form of shower and such,  I am increasingly afraid of it.  When I get the nerve I'll try what works for some, coating themselves with tea tree oil, extra virgin light olive oil, and/or coconut oil, and using tea tree oil shampoo all over, and making last of shower as hot as possible without scalding.   No nerve to try it yet.

The pain and inability to do anything with it has caused me to view showers like one might view a date with the whipping post.   When I wake up, all is well and I can't imagine ever having a problem.  Then a little activity reveals just a shadow of the pruritis letting me know that a little more will bring on the full rage of an attack.  So, I calmly do nothing and stay safe.

There is not way to write read, carry on a conversation or do anything but pace, roll round or slam against the wall when attacks occur.  And activity and showers bring on attack.

I was recording at a guy's house and it started up.  I had some prednisone and other stuff so I took that.  It was  minor attack but I could not do anything while it raged.  That was a close one.  Nothing like the way it is after a shower, or a walk up this hill.

I walked yesterday for first time in weeks. it was almost cold out. I felt OK.  I suffered for a long time after.  It took well over an hour for it to really abate.  The worst went on for about 30 minutes, and it went from more intolerable to a little less intolerable.  Finally it moved into tolerable range, without aftershock waves of attack after an hour or so.

I think a full juicing reboot, where you just take in fruit an vegetable juice for awhile will help.  Maybe it will balance whatever the underlying cause is.

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Ballistic Mountain, CA, United States
Like spring on a summer's day


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