Thursday, April 30, 2009

Can You get flu from the news?

After hearing all the talk, now I am sneezing and I think developing a sore throat. I ache a lot anyway so who knows if I have the muscle aches. I am pretty sure I caught it from the radio. I think Obama gave it to me when he was giving his course on basic health etiquette. Then the news lady on TV spit on me.

I'm not giving them the satisfaction of reporting it. This would be one of those "maybe" cases.

It could be that Joe Biden put the final hex on things. After hearing Gibbs explain what Joe was thinking when he was saying something else, who knows what's what. I am sure it is all a conspiracy. The real object of all this is to replace the White House Press Secretary.

After that lame attempt to spin Biden out of hot water with the travel industry, I believe they are searching for the only man who should have that job in this administration; the ex Iraqi Minister of Information. He's perfect for this job.

Remember when he was talking about roasting our stomachs as troops were overrunning Baghdad? He kept saying we were miles away getting a taste of Saddam's wrath. One or 2 D's there? No matter, he is no longer. The Info guy had so many classic lines they made coffee mugs and T-shirts with selected quotes.

Really, Gibbs makes Bush sound rather coherent and articulate. Perhaps to complement the fact that they are outdoing the insanity of Bush, they put Gibbs up to outdo the embarrassing articulatory of W, as well.

Not sure what happened to the popular Iraqi spinmeister, but it is time to bring him on board. let him roast some press corps stomachs.

I'm pretty sure the flu thing is a trick to get him in and Gibbs out. They are spreading the disease through power of suggestion. They don't care. To them, "you have to break some eggs..." The common good and change always require some eggs get broken. Any student of the greater good will tell you that.

If I am going to feel like a broken egg, at least I could have the hero of Baghdad telling me what Biden meant to say or what Obama meant not to say.

Things I notice But Don't usually mention

Since I've been out here, I have noticed an abundance of flowers. I can't identify most flowers so I won't give that rundown. Plenty of them and mostly in electric colors, yellow hot pink, glowing red and purple, etc. Now I see why I don't mention these things.

I see more hummingbirds in a week than I've seen in my entire life up to arriving here. I've seen them close enough to touch if I had quick enough hands, and the will to disrupt an innocent hummingbird's day.

There is an extraordinary abundance of good looking women, mostly wearing rocks on their fingers befitting their whatever. I noticed anyway. I'm just pointing these things out so people don't think I have no sense of the general aesthetic of the hood.

I've seen more pick up trucks than I recall seeing anywhere, even in pickup land south of years ago. That's outside the heart of the city, mostly.

Overall I've seen more politeness than I'm used to, even among the meanest looking people. Not always when they are driving though. Pick ups are the main offenders as are BMW's, on the road. There seem to be more Lexus and Mercedes than BMW. I approve of that. Toyota is king overall.

It is far more difficult to predict rain here than anywhere, even when the sky is dark and the air feels misty. It only pretends like it is going to rain most of the time.

I have also noticed things that I'm leaving out because I'll end up moping. Moping is forbidden until after rehab in Florida.

What they don't know is that I have more crazy teak adventures lined up for when I return. I'm not doing any cold turkey teak quit for good. I'll just learn how to deal with it in moderation.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Intervention Threatened

So, I was over at O's, that's project O to you, and I had to pop around to project J, the Duke of Earl's. It really wasn't overly obsessive compulsive or any number of initialed morbidities. OCB, ADHD, ROFL, LSD, etc. However, I did detect the slightest tinge of texture issue on the part where I'd made glue-sanding dust paste, used epoxy, etc. Just a little edge there.

Since I had a handy woody skewer with me---the happy leftover from a fruit kabob---I was ready to attack the miniscule problem. This time I coaxed the clear epoxy into the offending edge, then used home made cardboard applicators to apply a coating of sanding dust, then used the frayed end of the skewer (where I broke a piece off to use as mixer for epoxy) as a brush to sort of mix and move the resulting wood putty del mundo. I was able to get a fairly smooth result by smooth it over with the skewer stick and miniature cardboard trowels. It will sand easily. I'm proud of the work.

Actually I've been carrying the stick in my computer bag for a few days in anticipation of just such an event, and, alternately as a weapon. The point came in handy in the process for moving the mixture along the edge of the part that wasn't quite right. Were dealing with an overall area smaller than my little finger, and the point of focus smaller than the edge of the fingernail on that digit. In my mind it became gigantic. I like it when that happens.

A friend heard I was back over at project J smoothing trivia and adding more finish to the finished. I was asked if an intervention would be necessary. Of course, like a good addict, I said no. However I am slated to leave town for a 28 day program in South Florida. The plane leaves in a few days. Perhaps it will help.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Capitalism, Theft, and Sophisticated Lies and Thuggery

(most will prefer post below this for shorter lighter reading. This, however, was an effort to bring a rarely seen view which neither favors past military-industrial fascism lite, nor present day fascism/socialism lunacy. Just hoping to allay the common man's fear of freedom in my small, ahead of my time way. Modestly and with undue humility.)

In conversing with a friend today, he brought up something he'd seen in which the writer dubbed the Somali pirates the last capitalists, or something to that effect, citing their spirit of free enterprise. That topic was short lived in the larger discussion as are most topics which promise to bring on one of my freedom vs the alternative lectures, and rants about propaganda, etc. I try, but I still tend to do that.

The thought stayed with me, though, causing me to think about the topic. I would compare the pirates to the cutting edge of European and American politics and policies, but not to capitalism. Al Sharpton said these guys refer to themselves as "volunteer coast guard". He prefaced that with "more appropriately", meaning instead of pirates they more rightly refer to themselves as coast guard.

Al is either so blinded by race that he absolutely can't see anything else, or he is just insane. Oh, there is a third possibility---he may sniff opportunity to somehow turn it into a venue to ply his trade, peddling influence. It doesn't look like he's missed many meals.

Al is a capitalist, and a crook. Combine the two and that which should not serve as capital---wealth which can be employed to create more wealth---does serve. Things like people who falsely accuse others of rape and such. They become capital in Al's business of making a living by peddling hate based solely on race.

The evil is not using wealth to create wealth, but using lies and hatred, and government interference. That is a very bastardized form of free market at work. It is not free when you have force involved. Government involvement= force. Half truths = fraud. That is what keeps Al afloat; often there is an element of truth somewhere in history that he uses to advantage where it does not apply. It is the art of using partial truth and perverting context. The broad brush of fraud covers it.

Over the years people have been so bombarded by images and stories designed to paint industrialists and businessmen as evil oppressors of little people like me that the term "capitalist" has almost become a dirty word. Tiny Tim and I are so abused by these evil inventors and manufacturers of everything from toilet paper to pots and pans, we can hardly muster the energy to say "God bless us and spread the wealth around".

I hope at least someone will hear me through on this. No civilization or system works without some dependence on the integrity and goodness of the people in control. Capitalism places the control of wealth and resources in the hands of the people. Privately controlled wealth used according to the demands of the market.

They dropped buggy whips because it was not something that people wanted. That industry could not earn income producing an archaic product. If we aren't careful many so-called "green industries" being mandated will be the equivalent of subsidizing the buggy whip industry. Throwing good money after bad, retarding true and lasting innovation and progress.

The deceptive practices and employment of force, bribery of government officials, and the like are often cited as abuses of capitalism. In reality they have nothing to do with that system. They have to do with contracts not being properly honored and enforced, and with dishonest thuggery going unchecked.

More and more, due to being fed the idea that the savior from trickery is to place the control of capital under government control, people have come to believe that socialism is a more peaceful solution. Nothing could be further from the truth.

The trouble is, many who claim to be proponents of a free market are actually proponents of a market in which government is used in order to further the aims and success of a few who use part of their capital to buy the power of elected officials. That is why I believe the real culprit is the lack of adherence to the solid limits originally placed on our government.

Those limits did not include preventing the law from being tough against force and fraud, but they did prevent the fighting of wars to serve special interests, unrealistic regulations that targeted competitors and the like.

It was easy to start confusing corruption with righting wrongs because envy is one of those lesser human emotions which blinds reason, and passes for self righteousness once it is legitimized.

By allowing the creation of the irs, the American public actually closed the door on capitalism, or began its swing shut. You'd think providing the best widget for the money and making a profit so you can live well, and improving the widget to stay competitive, would be the normal focus. It takes so much in the way of resources for a firm of any size to court government favor, structure around taxes so you have something left, most people would not believe it.

I found it shocking well over 20 years ago when I first found myself in a situation to see it first hand. The result of all the various means of reward and punishment laid on from government is actually an institutionalized type of dishonesty.

I'll leave the myths around and about unions out of it for now. That is a real hotbed of religious zeal. Reason goes out the window on all sides.

Most people who have experience in large companies, and often the jobs are great, recognize that much of what is said would have been called "double talk" many years ago. I think that term gave way to "double-speak" then to all kinds of "speak". Not sure why. I worked for a company in which people lost their souls it seemed. They loved to use the term "integrity issue". They got fried over some real scam practices which got coined as integrity issues.

But it came to be that the rules written by congressional committee and agency czars, with plenty of company input and lobbying, enabled them to bombard the consumer with such gobbledegook that no one knew what the hell they were reading and hearing, and when these neo fascists at the company wanted to fry some underling for "integrity issue" it was usually because the honest empathetic underling had translated the language so that the consumer went in with his eyes wide open.

Doing a good job was really a bad job, and doing a bad job was really a good job.

That is what I consider a taste of fascism or socialism. Depending on the honesty goodness and wisdom of the few,( who don't even create the product), to control the wealth is a bad idea. They see the realm of money and resources as endless, and available upon command. Like the Sheriff of Nottingham, they live well while squeezing those who produce ever tighter, demanding further sacrifices at every turn.

If you take away the preconceived ideas and emotions, turning the power over to a few seems very risky. The game is complicated and has become further tangled because of unreasonable liability suits and the like. The ones who have bought their share of political clout don't really mind. The roadblocks are something they can afford, but the up and coming competition can't.

That's why I don't take it seriously when I hear the very large corporations who have more government contracts than they can count complaining publicly. They know they are set and competitors are screwed. It is a dog and pony show, an act. It is a taste of socialism. Government controlling the wealth and how it is used.

They do it like pirates, buy or die. It's no different than the old protection racket of the mafia. People in those neighborhoods even remember some of the thugs fondly for their generosity. They often threw crumbs to the local masses. Crumbs extorted from hard working merchants and producers.

Just like what our national and local governments are doing; the premise that put most of them in office---don't worry we'll shake down the other guy and give you a piece of what we steal.

Socialism puts control of capital and resources in the hands of government. The few. Usually they suggest guarantees for everyone. To honor any of that they have to take the fruits of labor, inventiveness and production from those who create and distribute it as they see fit. Of course a bunch of it gets lost in the middle to themselves, favored parties, government employees and no doubt foreign officials.

Abusive people in charge of wealth is not good but I fear it is easier to mitigate that abuse of power if the control is private rather than in the hands of those even further removed from the production of wealth who are fewer in number and remain in control by using the forces of armed government as well as promising the gullible and class envy crazed public with crumbs.

It sucked in the USSR, it sucked in Cuba, Venezuela and China. It sucks here.

That is why socialism is a bad idea and capitalism itself is not the culprit. Supply and demand is nature, creating wealth by using wealth is also nature.

Nothing says a capitalist can't employ some portion of his wealth, voluntarily, for some humane purpose, like say paying my rent or buying me a machine shop. Nothing says a government czar in charge of the wealth of a nation is not going to employ that power unwisely and purposely or through incompetence, cruelly. How can the few possibly be the best judge of what millions of unique individuals need or desire?

If you are an artist, you get paint and canvas and supplies (capital). Then you create a painting (product). If your work strikes the fancy of a patron or buyer, you get paid enough to cover the supplies plus some. You used wealth to create more wealth, you filthy capitalist!!

That is profit. You, my friend are a capitalist. And here you thought you were a socialist because you heard all those in the arts, by definition, must be socialists. It's OK. It is truly the more humane choice. Life and art overlap. Life and freedom should overlap. It is nature, and it is artistic integrity at its finest.

Frugal Envy

Over at CF's I was reading the last installment of her Hoe escapades. For the Jerry Springer generation, a hoe is actually a garden tool, and a ho is actually the word whore uttered by the inarticulate and/or ignorant. Sorry, facts are facts.

Sayings like "A tough row to hoe" came out of agrarian culture not baby daddy woes with the law and relationship issues. Bit of history there. Sad, but I lived long enough to be exposed to both modes of dialog. Otherwise, I'm not that much of a resource on anthropology or history of people. Then again, in today's world my little bit of historical knowledge is probably above average.

Be that as may, and who cares about what I think I know? So, after reading about this insistence that the broken, second hand hoe, bought around the corner from where I used to live in Memphis, just had to be repaired and any thought of shelling out 10 or 20 dollars for a new one was unacceptable, I found myself profoundly and sincerely envious.

I'm the type that if I had $40.00 to my name would have gone and found a cheap new hoe (or ho, possibly) for $20 or less, come home turned some dirt and been done with it. It could be why I am always po. Po is from the same lexicon as ho. To be a po ho must be a sad condition. Actually, in a sense I've felt like a po ho a time or two.

Anyway, I wish I knew when to hold 'em and when to shell 'em out. Usually the first place I don't spend is food. If I think money is tight, I starve. Yet I'd by some extra tool, drive to a pretty spot 40 miles away just to clear my muddled mind, etc. The smart thing is to buy the cheap food you can make yourself and be healthy--rice beans, etc. and change my own oil in the car rather than burn precious petrol. Earth be damned--I have yet to believe I contribute to climate whims or the "earth's fever". I have fairly fuel efficient transport because I hate to buy lots of gas, not out of the slightest sense that I am "doing something for the earth" or that such choices are in any stretch of the imagination, noble.

Back to the envy. I really do admire those who can find bargains, dress like a million bucks with startling finds at thrift shops, and just generally get it right. My luck with bargains is rarely good. I do OK on my car purchases but never on bargain clothes. My impatience often leads me to buy a hoe, (not ho--really!!) when a clever person would figure out it is a Craftsman and maybe Sears will replace it like they do all Craftsman tools when they break. I did that only one time in my life, as a kid, with a socket wrench, the ratchet thing, 3/8".

On a day like today, it tweaks my jealousy nerve when someone has the ability and gumption to keep their money instead of giving up and giving it away. Of course she'd still be trying to fix the thing with band aids and tooth picks if she hadn't married the wiz kid who knows the craftsman tool pledge.

Monday, April 27, 2009

What Luck, a stranger wants to know me better

My journalspace ( the new one) blog remains pretty much dormant. I opened one there but do all my writing here.

Imagine how my heart lept when I received this lovely message from the lovely, articulate Doris: Blogs to me
show details 2:57 AM (19 hours ago)


Doris sent you a new message:


My dearest;
And your health which is the most important;
my regards to your family and friends over there.
My name is Doris Zarki. I was impressed to invite for a private discussion after my intensive search for a trusted and honest many.I will like to demand your trustee and sincerity as a friend;a long-term loving relationship from you.Also know more about you,your country and culture,i will also like to seek your advice too.i think we can help each other.I will send you my details with my pictures after you have replied to my email.( )
I look forward to hearing from you.
Have a nice day.
Love from Doris

Must be my lucky day. I can tell she's hot and head over heels infatuated with me. Feel free to email her yourself, and of course ask for her pictures. I know we have a mental connection so strong that I needn't bother with the email.

Tennis Tip #1 and PC tips and else

First let me say that "special needs" does not mean that A. can't hit a forehand ground stroke at maybe 150 MPH straight at your feet. Needs to get whupped is what I say. Special needs, schmecial shneeds is what I say; this is war. Really, that kid just keeps getting better. His power shot used to just go out of bounds, providing you got your head out of the way. Now it is actually a thing of beauty. Special whatever does not mean one has no athleticism or grace. I've grown rather fond of him and his partner in running me ragged.

On to the helpful hint. It is highly possible that one of A's fast moving deep line drives might bounce just where you expect and you may be perfectly positioned to get the racket in front of it so that it will be sent back over the net. That is my number one goal; get it over the stupid net. My number 2 goal is for it to land inside the lines once it makes it over the net. That's it. Easy peazy.

OK. So, there you are, just where you think you should be, all set to finally return that runny nosed kid's rocket shot. Beware such apparent good fortune. A may have somehow put the most bizarre spin ever on the ball such that it bounces then turns so that instead of continuing in the original direction it makes a bee line over toward your chest. Since you were so smugly positioned just right you assume you can plant your feet and rest them there.

What can happen is that your feet now become clay as you beg them to move the rest of you to the left so you can hit the ball. As you stumble about while trying to swing the racket to hit the ball, you can smack yourself smartly in the face. Once you do this, recovering dignity is not easy task.

The best I could do, after ascertaining that my glasses hadn't broken and that I wasn't bleeding, was to declare that this was a warning; "OK. You've seen what I can do to myself with this racket, just think what I could do to you!!"

The moral of the story is, either refuse to play against A and T, or be prepared to get out of the way. Whatever you do, if the cause is obviously lost, do not hang on to the idea so long that you smack yourself in the face. Self flagellation with the racket is not considered good form in any tennis venue where polite or semi-polite company is to be found. People will, however, give you a wide berth, if that's your goal.

If you have a PC and you go to open a page on the net, and all of a sudden official looking pop ups claiming to be microsoft or someone tell you it is urgent you click here to run a spy sweeper because you are being invaded by trojan this or that, don't do it. A friend got caught off guard and this resulted in big trouble. Getting the computer straightened out involved loss of data and a long phone call with Gandhi. McAfee didn't do any good in this case. Apparently there are fake spyware things out there as well that offer free goods but they are just trouble. I believe one is called spy something 360.

It makes me feel better about deciding to get a mac for the Tour.
This is long enough so else should be a short bit of babbling. Nerve, clear objective, and the target of affection are things I want to bring into my life at this juncture. I believe it is all possible. The idea of parallel universes makes sense to me so I'm one who can believe most anything that holds promise of a bright future. The realm of possibilities is not finite, or at least so vast that for all practical purposes it may as well be considered limitless. But none of these is likely to be found looking at the realm of limited things that lead nowhere. That's today's pep talk to self.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Light at End of Whatever is Not Train Heading This Way

It's the whatever that is the question, not so much the light at the end of it. This job which was bid for X dollars, based on N hours of work at W dollars per hour, plus E dollars of expenses, became something of a walk over the edge. An adventure into the recesses of the mind; that region where fact and fiction, need, desire, and compulsion all blend into kaleidoscopic field of decorative confusion.

So, the formula was N x W + E = X.

X is the constant here. I made a deal; X dollars for this job. What we found when we reached the light at the end, which illuminated the final formula, was this: (Nx3)x(W/3)+E=X. Sure you can reduce it down to the same thing, but we are talking 3 times the hours and one third the wage. It makes no difference to X.

You can see how pain and suffering can be buried in statistics. The bottom line comes out the same. Be very productive for decent wages or obsessive compulsive, and therefore slow, for slave wages. The end result is the same.

Lots of people would actually pay someone a lower wage for lots of hours than a higher wage for much fewer hours, even when the end result is the same. They feel better if whomever they pay suffers. Those people may be sadists. They are without a doubt idiots. They are also in the majority.

Don't deny it. I know at least two out of the three people reading this fall into that camp. I mean idiot in the most complimentary possible sense. And sadist in the most benign of contexts.

In my case the sadistic idiotic boss turned out to be me. Obviously, I was probably suffering the aftermath of some sort of dimensional anomaly. It wouldn't be the first time. Things are more complex than your basic big bang theory.

All that and I still finished the famous Project J. As much as it can be competed for now. I'll go back sometime and go ovr the thirsty wood again, but that should be about it. This stuff may or may not even be teak. Every piece of wod is very different from the other. It ranges in color as do humans, from black to red to yellow to white to brown. You can't tell how it will be until the oil is applied. Either the jefe will like it or not. If not there is still now way to complain about the work. If you don't like the variance, talk to the sneaky Philippines manufacturer.

If you are buying beware the same manufacturer. They use stain which makes it appear that you have a more natural thing than you do. It masks places where they repaired splits with glue, filled holes, etc. Very sneaky.

Who cares? What I have been doing became insane. I would just stare at it wondering what could make it better, why I was there, and did it look great or horrible---I really can't tell the difference at this point. That's just sad. It is part of my nature though. I'll think everyone but me knows, until much later.

At that time my view will emerge, fostering resentment on my part, should I believe the wrong view now. If someone says it is good, and later I am sure it is bad, I'll feel betrayed. Same with other way around.

I know I do good work. There are instances in which the result belies the process. This may be such a case, or it may be otherwise. I simply don't know at this moment.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009


Almost done with my art teak project, code name project J, or Monty Python's flying courtyard. I'll have to get at least some photographic evidence. I think I do have some before video on my Flip. It's one of those things that may or may not show up on film (or what ever) as it really is. The difference shocks even me.

Some of this stuff could easily have been dumped to the curb and people would have passed it by. You'd not have known it was worth saving or that if you did it would be at all attractive. So, as it turns out, it was worth saving and it looks splendid. I've learned a lot about something I amy or may not ever again encounter. That is once project O is finished. Lots to do there, but the nature and quality is different. O's stuff leaves no question that it is worthwhile.

One thing is certain, this project J person got more out of me than I estimated. It was my choice to spend more time and go to a little more trouble than at first I planned. That is my downfall; I get lost in the spirit of the thing rather than think how I am minimizing my hourly reward rather than maximizing it.

There are times, on other jobs when I've maximized the returned for the time put in, but not always. In this case, it was worth it to me to do things I had not planned and to experiment and learn.

The real test will come when the hotshots are back in town. He has a rep for being a little tough to deal with. There is no way he could be justified doing any less than nominating me for the Nobel Teak prize. Feedback from others has been good. You never know with the mega wealthy. It is a different world from even the rather wealthy. I tend to like something about that world though, the little I know of it. These people work and do things intelligently. I do not resent their wealth. I appreciate it. They pay my rent. Wealthy people leave a wake of jobs behind them, directly and indirectly.

I may end up somewhat wealthy, if it remains legal to do so long enough. Or I may remain hand to mouth, day by day and month by month. Teak reconditioning is not likely to make me rich, unless I write a book. Maybe The Teak Diaries, a la Motorcycle diaries by the most adored psychopath of our times.

Must be that there is some Zen Buddhist Monk in me. I know I should be concerned about the future and retirement, health care, and of course The Planet, but I find I can ignore all those things and be pleasantly satisfied thinking only short term as I try to make art out of patio furniture. That is one strange thing. Even so, as I commune with the flowers and trees and sandpaper, I do wonder about many things I refuse to define here.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Yea, But It's a Dry Heat

That is a phrase I learned since embarking on the Tour west. It often applies to the justification for inhabiting the desert. There seem to be all kinds of variations when it comes to desert. I haven't learned all of it. I know I am not far from there, but this is not the desert. It is technically in the middle of national forest. The trees are just extremely short. Shorter than the rocks and boulders in most, but not all, cases.

I worry about mentioning record breaking heat because those so inclined may decide this is the result of evil humans inhabiting the planet and building machines. I'm not in that camp. I think the evil humans are only responsible for record breaking cold temperatures when they occur. And for record breaking snowfall. That is all the fault of those arrogant interlopers who just landed on the planet and decided they had a right to make it their home.

Until recently the love and blind adoration for earth was hardly mentioned. Once they got organized all they wanted to do was have sex and beg for a good growing season and kids who weren't idiots. The good old days...

Fortunately much of the time today involved the teak cleaning and brightening process which requires that you spray the stuff with water, a lot. That may have kept things cooler. It was breezy enough anyway. The temp was at least 95F. It was the one time I checked what my car had to say, and it was in the shade.

I think when people have enough money they can bribe the weather gods and get little concessions like a pleasant breeze. Another of the reasons I like the environment in which I do this menial, maniacal, obsessive compulsive project. It's like boot camp, preparing me for things to come, and getting me back in the mood to attack life, one the menial level or for a billion dollars. Most likely my attack will remain in the low few figure range, but I see no reason to rule out possibility.

Project J appears almost done. It's a friggin work of art. There is still the chance I may be the only one who knows that although I was told in spanish by a housekeeper that my work is is very beautiful. I think that's what we were discussing. It was amiable at any rate, and I conversed without hemming and hawing. I surprised myself. No sentences like, "Si, el worko is mucho and los teakos no hay la easy".

Ideas are still cooking. I'd like to see if I can get some of the things rolling when I can get the time. It's a three or four pronged attack, with none of the prongs closely related.

You have no idea how hard it is not to comment on the recent conference with Obama, Hugo, and Larry Curly and Moe. Among other things in the zany world of hope and change.

Teak Tip # X(y+2)420 and Artistic Happiness

If you find that the wood is sort of split with gaps in places you can't glue with clear epoxy and clamp together, so you settle for sort of filling them in, take some wood glue, squirt some into the crack (sounds racy but this is technical) get some sanding dust from the same project--empty out the dust bag from the sander--- squirt some more glue on the discarded cardboard container that once held the sand paper, mix in some dust, tear a strip of that cardboard off to use as a paddle to mix it up into a fairly thick paste.

Then take that and work it into the crevice being healed. The one you already put some glue in. Keep adding and working it in with the cardboard stick you tore off earlier. It has a glossy finish which helps. Keep doing that, using the finesse and touch which comes from experience and years of sobriety, until you have built up the surface so that the actual crack is no longer visible.

Later you can sand it down and curse the fact that it doesn't look exactly like the other wood around it. It's better than the alternative, and if you were going to paint it, no one would know. If you are going to do teak oil, you can sand it in such a way that it just looks like some weirdness in the wood. It will be marvelous and you'll be glad you did it.

Otherwise you risk clothing or body parts catching on the errant splitting pieces of wood. It could result in gigantic splinters greeting the other side of your belly, instead of the warm caress most teak sitters crave.


Is it just me or does there seem to be a dearth of humor in modern society lately? I don't completely mean the jokester stuff but just a general cheerfulness. The carefree art and such of happier times is tougher to come by. It could just be me.

The TV comedians have taken to tired political jokes, almost as if they all have the same writers. I mentioned that before. But they aren't funny. Most radio talk is devoid of much cheer. Of course that is understandable given the subject matter.

Somehow it used to be that one could lampoon politics and make it funny, even if you disagreed with the underlying sentiment. I think there is one exception; Dennis Miller of all people. I've caught his radio show a few times lately, parts of it anyway, and he seems to have the ability to make a point and not lose the humor. I was always kind of lukewarm about Dennis but now I find myself becoming a fan. Dennis and the Padres. What's next?

Anyway, I keep hoping for an artistic revolution of sorts. Sort of like a modern day Peter Max, but not a knock off, some direction we never considered.

I may be imagining all this. How does one know when he is delusional? Lots of people find their thrills in video games, but that seems a little lacking in humanity, and other than the skills acquired manipulating the gadget, the games appear to lack redeeming values of any kind. Maybe it is fun. But it misses the mark on what I think is due. These are the times which are ripe for a cultural revolution and twist of thinking. It is hard to explain what I am thinking but I am thinking something.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Now I'm A Baseball Fan

On the way home from work, I've been catching the end of ball games on the radio. It appears San Diego Padres are off to a great start. Isn't a Padre a Catholic priest? I knew Cubans could play baseball and box, but I never thought about priests being good players. Not sure what this has to do with Cubans. The mind is a many splintered thing.

Whatever the deal, I guess the Padres from this town can play. Maybe it is because their social life is limited. I know, the limited social life of a priest is a dubious stereotype. What do I know? I've only met a few priests. Most were witty characters. One was pure evil, and that's that. That was the one at immigration hearings, years ago in Miami, who wanted all the federal money sent down there for immigrants to go through him. Long story but the guy had nerve. He gave me the creeps like I've never experienced just from being in proximity to someone.

It does seem that everyone likes this city a lot. Some places are like that.

Latest road merchandise, let's see, a drive shaft, of course a ladder, landscape bags (?)--must be bags of dirt--seems like something else that would be useful but I can't remember it. Maybe it was a stove or something like that. Other than that all I have to report is a rash of people driving into buildings. Someone drove into the dentist's office, another crashed into a restaurant, and some else drove into some kind of business. It must be all the rage.

OK. No days off until I'm done with project J. If project O was free of people this week I would include it, too. They are likely to be in the way for a week or two so I guess I'll have to take time off when J is complete. I love the environment there. It is like going to work in the Garden of Eden every day. I'm one of the few workers there for which Spanish is not the first language.

They are hurting for cash in this state. As the rhetoric has increased on the subject, I noticed the prevalence of speed traps has too. I heard the city actually shortened the yellow lights so the cameras would catch more people, bring in more money. I believe they got caught and some group nailed them in court. The cams are a money loser and prevent no accidents. Nice piece of technology though, if you only consider intrinsic value and not what it is for.

Contempt Prior to Investigation

I forget who the guy was that listed that as a principle which is guaranteed to result in everlasting ignorance. A corollary to that would be acceptance prior to investigation. Many cases of contempt and acceptance prior to investigation are flooding the culture these days. Most of it is on purpose, and people, being human and not wanting to be odd man out spotlighted for ridicule, go along.

Have you noticed how mainstream comedians and people like Letterman pick up the political ball lately? He's become unwatchable, but I catch bits here and there that all sound as if scripted by the same hack. One example was when Rom said Rush Limbaugh was the new face of the Republican Party, implying that he pretty much called the shots.

I find Rush a bit hard to take due to the back patting ego, but I do not find him mean or hateful as portrayed. Letterman and others took the hint and went to town trying to label him the same way Rom did. I'm no fan of either party because both got us to this place, hitting from different angles but heading to the same place. But I have listened enough to know that it was a purposeful bit of propaganda to say he is the face of the party.

Rev. Wright is not the face of the Democratic party. All these personalities get in the way of the truth. I've never seen this country so blindly splintered. I know people who absolutely go hostile at the mention of a Republican. Usually critics I know just shake their heads when someone is outed as a democrat. In today's environment, it is far safer to be a dem. It is less safe than ever to be a Libertarian or leaning that way. They got you on a list with terrorists. I blame republicans and democrats for that.

Back when the 911 report came out I could see both parties hard at work setting up things to undermine individual sovereignty, and of course by-passing state and local authority. To hell with any steenkeeng constitution. The whole purpose of that is to limit power of government.

The phrase "a nation of laws" was originally meant a government limited in scope by laws. Lines drawn to keep it in check. That flipflopped so that now "a nation of laws" means a nation with so many damned laws that a person can't sneeze without breaking one. The people are now limited and the ones who have to have permission to act. The plan was to have a government that needed permission.

Anyway. I've seen very blatant examples of dissent being twisted, mis-reported and painted as insanity lately. Further investigation paints another picture. People accept much of what is being done economically because we are told it is OK, and there are crises to avert. Maybe yes, maybe no. Investigation and following the dominos back to the point when they were all standing is not easy, but yields another view.

So many statistics get spouted without evidence or source. Often when the true numbers are obtainable, they vary greatly from those quoted by our elected officials and their sales puppets in the news. The actual influence of US guns in Mexico is one example. Apparently they've inflated that for some reason to become clear soon. It sounds like an excuse to once again inconvenience non-trouble makers.

I have to say, as one who is loathe to apologize for being a citizen or for much else internationally, I am a bit put off that Obama is taking the blame for Mexico's problems and those of the rest of the world, on behalf of the US. It is a bit laughable to be claiming we are arrogant with a great many Brits and French in the crowd. But even when I was furious at Bush, that bit about being ashamed to be American, and the guilt I was supposed to feel toward the gold diggers overseas never quite touched me.

I'm beyond the point of being mad at Obama or Bush or even Hilary. It's too sad. I'm wondering if some of the fiction I read was actually a vision sent by God. The people and events are jumping off of Orwell's, Huxley's and Rand's pages.

They can do or say what they like, and the people can find their religion in some unknown goal of the state (there are definitely religious overtones in all the mischief), as long as I have duct tape, WD-40, channel locks and my lucky Leatherman tool, I'm ahead of the game.

My first instinct many years ago about Arnold was correct. He is an ego maniac and a nincompoop. One of those people just smart enough to get by but not bright enough to know he is not that bright. He absolutely does not get it. For awhile I thought he understood the USA. Clearly he doesn't. He understands fascism and thinks it is OK because he considers his brand benevolent.

Who would have guessed that we'd come to a point at which "the Rich" are considered greedy devils, and the best security is not to own anything? OK. Maybe some us did guess it. Still, I really never believed they'd be compiling lists of enemies based not on substantial history but on whether you disagree with those in power. !!Bien Venidos a Habana!!

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Spirit of the Tour

It seems advisable to keep up with what's happening on the totalitarian front, but letting it mess with you too much is not the best approach. Real life is largely conducted apart from the life I see on the news that supposedly includes me or people I know.

This present assault on the culture of freedom has been coming for a long time, and I was aware of it so I'm not surprised. It is not encouraging but I know I will never ultimately go along. Every day it is easy to read Big Brother between the lines; always in the name of fighting drug cartels, illegal immigration or terrorists. In the case of drugs and illegals, the target of the measures gets missed. In all cases, people doing nothing wrong, minding their own business are increasingly the real target. Minor inconvenience and sacrifices of privacy are adding up rapidly.

That is what was cool about the Tour from the start. I was shot out into the unknown without any official anything. Oblivious to all but the experience for much of the time. It gave me a much greater appreciation for this country. There are a million very cool spots. The whole thing pulled me out of a pit I wasn't enjoying. Sometimes a wave of that enthusiasm and willingness to face the unknown washes over me.

It still feels like I am in the process of the Tour. I am, actually. Even though I'm in a place and doing things here, it hasn't lost the charm of feeling like a journey. I think that is what life is supposed to be, and lots of people have a handle on that from the start. Pity that I was waylaid a long time ago, and that the result was a bit less than storybook bliss, but letting that overshadow successful progress toward a change of everything makes no sense. I like the changes and direction of things. My mind occasionally rebels against the new and better, wanting to find comfort in the old hopeless place of defeated spirits. Forget that.

Things take awhile. Old habits and patterns don't just go away because the geography changes. This is an exercise in a type of discipline and perseverance. I know what that means in case it doesn't make sense to anyone else. When I am able to see the contrast between before and after, I am happy. The only way I know how to describe the main thing that makes it possible is to call it faith. Faith in what I can't or won't describe, except to say it is often blind faith. This is the right thing, and it will be OK. That's how it goes.

Whether by design or just because, it does seem like the media bombards the airwaves with things that would fuel anyone's discouragement. Way back when I used to say that the news is the government's sales force. Now I see that is being proven more than ever. They are also the sales force of pessimistic self appraisal and fatalistic view of the future.

It probably is not so bad for government workers, but anyone with a spirit of independent freedom is going to be discouraged by the volume of official complications and nonsense. I have enough of that from the detractor voice inside my mind. No need to feed it with the daily butchering of history, truth, and all that I hold holy, doled out by government's and their salesmen twenty fours hours a day.

Something addictive about it. Where do they get these news people? Are those TV anchors aware that they are like human cartoons? I think many viewers believe they are sincere and real. Maybe they just stare is disbelief like I do.

The Tour is the best defense. If I can treat this phase like the on the road part, then life will be OK. It makes me long for a road trip. Maybe I'll run up the coast if conditions permit sometime in the summer. I've got the tent and all that stuff. Plus I have places and people I might be able to see.

That is the one thing that bugs be about the police staters and cap and trade socialists; they are dead set on killing mobility. Maybe I'll end up with a bike and one of those little trailers. I can't picture myself in a bike get up though. Tights are an affront to the public on some people.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

The Gods May Not Be Crazy but La Gente, hay un cosa loca

My Spanish is perfect. Anyone who speaks espanol and finds it otherwise is merely the victim of some popular dialect. So many things have been broadcast over the airways and written in news reports lately which I find utterly astounding, where would one begin to separate truth from fiction; right from wrong; sane from insane.

One thing for sure, misinformation and dishonest propaganda has swept the nation and the world like the British Invasion swept music in the 60's. It's everywhere and popular to the point of mass hysteria. Except it is not fun and upbeat like the early Beatles. Fun and upbeat is what is lacking these days. I am always fun and upbeat, but I may be nuts, so that may not count. Until now, I never considered myself a pathological liar. Well, that can be fun and upbeat if done with a high level of artistic integrity.

I'll try to get some stuff done at project O, as it pays as I go. However I am taking no days off until project J is complete because I'll at least get paid sooner and because I only have 2 weeks. At that time I am going to a southern Druid retreat located on a golf course. I will be erecting an alter to the god of the forest. It will look much like a patio or deck.

No telling what else will unfold on that adventure. I bet Homeland Security will be watching since southern druids are considered a potential security threat. They haven't actually done any violence or threatening mischief--YET. But HS thinks they could. It could happen. A bunch of neo southern druids in hoodies, like gangstas, could confuse people who don't know they aren't really a gang. They might hold mass fertility rites and upset the balance.

I think they should watch squirrels. I've noticed that in many areas they have become more brazen, and although they haven't organized and attacked people en masse, they could. It could happen. Better safe than sorry.

How did we ever survive before Homeland Security came on the scene? You may say they are there to protect against foreign fanatics on a mission from the peace be upon him guy, but they gave that up long ago. They figured out that the potential for domestic threats is huge. We have something like 350 million potential threats in this country, not counting coyotes, bears and squirrels.

Any one of your neighbors could go berzerk and pose a safety threat at any time. Watch them closely and report any unusual behavior; things like fertility rites in the back yard, independent thought, home remodeling, installing altars or patios.

So, before long I'm going underground. I'll infiltrate their ranks pretending to build the patio-like altar. Then I'll wait until they come show their subversive faces. Depending on various factors I may see about trapping them in some sort of fertility ceremonies. Then after a few such events, or more, I'll spring the trap and let Homeland Security take it from there.

Homeland Silencing

I read the Homeland Security memo which outlines the threats of "right wing extremists". It is too bad, but I doubt most people have either the courage or the wherewithal to see through the very clear agenda driven propaganda. It is very clear that the "report" states opinions more than facts, and has no data to back up most of it.

They continually harp on the fact that we have the first "African-American" president. That, in itself, is a troubling phrase. Because no one wants to upset the cart they don't say, "Is he African or American? I thought an American president had to be American." When you become the president it is time to drop the hyphens. It is far more inclusive to do so. But for whatever reason it pleases the sensibilities, I guess I'll roll with that one.

It was historic in that sense. First African appearing person to be elected. That has no bearing on my view of issues. But the Homeland Security report implies that anyone who disagrees with this administration's philosophy of government is likely to be racist, and probably recruiting others in order to blow things up.

They target returning veterans as potential threats, those who don't like job outsourcing, those who feel less power is due the national government in favor of power being more in the jurisdiction of state and local government, or even the individual.

The bottom line is that they are lumping all critics of the government and this administration in with the KKK and those like them. I can tell you now that I am in disagreement with the economic and foreign policy approach of this administration. I don't agree at all with their ideas regarding cap and trade or much else. It has nothing to do with skin color. I would have voted for Thomas Sowell had he been running, or Obama had he been a fan of Milton Freidman. Or a fan of individual freedom.

Just the way I see it. Socialism, by definition, flies in the face of freedom because someone is deciding where the fruits of your labors go, and it ain't you. That is theft. It is slavery. Just because the tyrant smiles and claims your forced sacrifice is for a good cause does not give him the right to run your life.

Painting dissenters as "right wing extremists" and racists is a very serious step toward a kind of oppression which will come back to bite everyone except those in power sooner or later. The precedent is not a good one and the trend is not benevolent. We Will still have to pay to fill our gas tanks, and we will still have to pay our rent or mortgage. Those who think otherwise will find they traded their right to life liberty and the pursuit of happiness for a spot on the chain gang. It is one case in which even ignorance is not bliss.

I guess I speak up because not to do so would further empower the social pressure in the air that makes it uncomfortable to admit you are not a democrat or a fan of Obama, Rom, Ted, Janet, Hilary, and the rest of those people who in my mind actually hate those they pretend to serve, and certainly they seem to hate my ancestors who were involved in fighting for free states and in the development of this country. Not to mention the world wars and such as that. Supposedly all that bllod was shed for freedom and protecting rights of the individual. Allegedly those wars were fought so future generations would be free of tyranny in this country; so they wouldn't have to fight such bloody wars. I doubt police actions and complicated rules of engagement would have made sense back then.

Not Again--Good Ideas out in the ether

Darn, dagnabbit, horse hockey and double dangnaminous!!! I had some good topic and poof. By the time I wrestled with passwords and all this garbage I suddenly had to use, couldn't remember and don't know if it was just the system being raided by Homeland Security, I forget why I am here.

I think it was something that sidestepped my complaints about overbearing insane ruling classes and all that come with them. That is hard for me when it comes to writing. I am passionate about the meanings of "democracy in a republic" and freedom of the individual. But people don't care about that sort of abstract thinking as they fill out forms written by sadistic second grade teachers addressing a class of helpless children they don't kill only because they find torture to be sublimely fulfilling. I speak of the IRS here, of course. Hey, it was on the news--they're hiring. I may apply. An incompetent employee can save taxpayers a bundle. I have experience in another state's tax dept,--- long ago. And my views then were similar to what they are now. Many people in that state owe me a big thank you.

To be a serious IRS employee who really believes it is his duty to hound the productive and, curses on them, The Rich, is to be a person who has no business in even a semi free country. It is like legalized pettiness, theft, sadism, envy and thuggery. I cannot believe so few elected officials ever suggest the abolishment of that scum bag agency. Ron Paul did, which is what has endeared him to me.

I understand various agencies, state and federal, keep creating check lists of possible home grown terrorists or militia members. You can count yourself on that list if you disagree with the present administration and any number of policies and agencies. Many of those policies may have been put in place by previous administrations. Mostly if you are not democrat or republican and you think limiting national powers to those enumerated in the Constitution then they paint you as all kinds of ugly.

Somehow they try to tie that thinking in with racist groups and much else which is far off the mark. It is a creeping type of neo-McCarthyism and not any different than the tactics and methods of all the ugliest dictatorships and totalitarian regimes which rose and mostly fell in the twentieth century. Free speech as it was intended when guaranteed as a right has become a dangerous practice. Maybe I'm paranoid but I don't send letters and sign petitions. After the HS exercises in the Memphis area when random people were pulled over and businesses harassed, I opt out. They put all the stuff they gathered in some anti-terror database.

They can have it. I'll settle for life as a drop out. Or a rogue IRS agent. The brush I had with weaselly auditors in that other tax department turned my stomach enough. I doubt I could take ten seconds with the hard core version. Our version of the KGB or SS. I think that is why so many, even in Congress, don't move to abolish it. They get on the wrong side of whoever is in power and the IRS dogs are sent after them. That lawless agency can make trouble whether it is warranted or not. And they all use it. Dems and Repubs.

Got to be a better way.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Ups and Downs and the Art of Mental Maintenance

It must be a function of nature. The weight of nature vs nurture has come to my attention lately in other contexts, but it has caused me to wonder where each applies in my own case. I don't think there is a clear delineation as the two often work with synergistic effectiveness for good or ill. In my case, I suppose there has been more ill result than I'd choose. The element of choice based on conscience, logic, and possibly mystical belief can temper the effect of a spirit that follows a sine wave.

Practice and perseverance actually do work when it comes to leveling off yoyo emotions. The trick of recognizing the highs and being careful is probably an advanced level of the art. After periods of being down, a high is always a welcome relief. Neither condition is very useful. I haven't had too much trouble with this stuff for awhile, but it is only because of the habit of constantly curbing the out of bounds thoughts which lead to the blues. Anyone can come up with a thousand things abut himself that are deficient, defective and no good. They are generally not even legitimate, but that doesn't matter. That's where nurture and nature take hold.

One might be somehow wired to flipflop into a depressed state, and if early learning included some kind of shock for minor mistakes or just differing opinion, he will beat "them" to the punch, berating himself and indulging in self loathing.

The real key is to discover that thoughts can be controlled. Many people think they can't but they are wrong. There is a difference in saying "be positive, be cheerful" and stopping when a thought like "you're an idiot and everyone hates you" comes up, then asking where did that come from. For one thing, you don't even know everyone, so that is obviously an unproven statement. The internal dialog that uses words like always, should, never, worthless, etc. can be inspected under a lens of cold logic. It is pretty rare that one always screws everything up, always says the wrong thing or never does anything right. The chemicals released by full blown funk become somewhat addictive even though they are no fun. That's why the mind resists shooting down the things that fuel the blues.

That was one of the most astonishing things I ever learned; that the mind will actually play tricks on otherwise intelligent people. It still amazes me, and I think it is a thing that takes a long time to learn to combat. Why the mind would try to defeat itself is a complicated proposition but it does. The why is less important than taking the power away from things which don't enhance enjoyment and meaning in life. So much is up to how a thing is viewed. One person is thrilled to have a meal, while another is bummed because the meal is not better.

OK. That's my pep talk to myself for now. Speaking of meals, I got to bring home a bunch of Easter leftovers so I not only have a meal, but I have as good a meal as I could ever want. No problemo there.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Sound of Music

I was sent this link to a cool video It fits in abstractly with a great idea the just floated into my mind shortly before I viewed this.

When the movie, Sound of Music, came out I avoided seeing it, thinking it wasn't cool or sexy. At that age I was a bit stupid. When I finally saw it, I loved it. It was about freedom, and the clear cut difference between the human spirit as it should be, and the spirit of tyranny which always emerges when the philosophy of "the greater good" becomes dominate and inevitably bastardized. The MAN vs the free individual. What is most significant about the movie is the deeper meaning behind the dynamics of the story. Some people don't get it, and some do.

Of course the phrase, "sound of music", is a metaphor for the spirit of freedom. It makes so much sense, whether one considers it corny or not. Nothing corny about escaping the conformity and control and murderous authority of a Hitler, Castro, or possibly some in our own country I could mention. None of these forces gain momentum without it looking like a good cause in the early stages. People always give up their rights in the name of what they think is a good cause. Then they find out it is not as they thought and that the boot comes down on them as well as those they were willing to sacrifice in pursuit of that nebulous "greater good". Usually sanctioned villains emerge. People and classes which become fair game for hate and harassment. We are seeing that here in the USA, where such things are not supposed to happen. It plays, like many local car ads, to the lowest, basest aspects of human nature, and to the ignorance of the lowest common denominator. That tactic works. It sells cars.

Speaking of cars. I was in that business, and the most appalling aspect of it was that the most money was made off of those with the least. The real shocker was that they generally refused to hear the truth if you tried to talk them out of sinking themselves in a bad loan for more car than was reasonable. I hated to deal with those customers. That may explain why I bailed from that job. I did well with people of means and sense. It was always good when someone actually trusted my suggestions and didn't sink themselves in some stupid obligation just because they could.

Anyway, it was a study in how easily people can be influenced by what they see on TV. And how their greed for the shiny object clouded their judgement like a drowning man. You try to help and they lash out at you as if you are the enemy.

All that aside, sort of, I had an idea that might work if I can get the cooperation I need to pull it off. What is ironic is that it might be a hit with groups whose philosophy and reason for liking it would be completely different from my own motivation. It's all about the sound of music. Wouldn't it be bizarre to enlist those who haven't a clue what that means?

Just a minor scheme. Nothing earth shattering, but I don't need earth shattering, only projects which can provide some lasting satisfaction and benefit for myself and those who trade with me or work with me. This one may be crazy enough to work. I know it could work. If the idea floated into my mind, it has to be out there for anyone to grab. That's how I think these things work. I can't believe no one has done this. Those who would be most motivated are unlikely to actually do anything. They are too busy making noise and being hateful. My scheme has no hate involved, just music.



I confess, I figured Obama would never give them the latitude to do what they felt they had to do. Now they will need to do some real trickery to shut the rest of these bastards down. Taking hostages is a very low business and those who trade that way deserve whatever it takes to stop them. The world is a much poorer, more violent place than it has to be. Between superstition and pure stupidity it seems a condition which won't change much anytime soon.

Easter is the big time of rebirth. Nice time for fertility rites. I'm quite happy that ship's captain was rescued.

This has been one of the best Easter Sundays I've experienced in years. I've got some good leftovers I brought home to prove it. What an unusual day when I consider an unexpected card or two I've fallen into a place where the people I know just won't let me give up and fade away. Then on the way home the great Idea jumped into my thoughts. Perfect.

Sleep Is Almost All I Crave

It's another world and lately my brain is really pushing for it. Except that actually sleeping at the right times is difficult, and at the wrong times it is not. The result is that I'm not quite all here in my waking hours. Or less all here than usual. A matter of degree I suppose. It's one of those phases in which I am often confused between things that really occurred and those that were dreamt. I keep it to myself. Nothing of great importance is in that mix.

I caught the old movie, The In-Laws, with Peter Falk and Alan Arkin on a local station. It seems a remake was made, but hard to imagine anyone equalling the original.

What struck me was that since the dictatorships of Latin America could never pay off their debts, they were stealing plate to print money. It was feared the economy would go into chaos due to all the additional money in circulation. Some very curious parallels with today's world, right down to the crazy generalisimo with the talking hand and fabulous art collection of black velevet master pieces.

I'm wondering what the remake must have been like. I suspect they did a more sensitive politically correct version. Who would have thought a movie like that could hold so many strange elements of prophesy if you don't look too literally at the comparisons.

The similarities, such as spend your way out of debt, print worthless money to fund it, and then sweat out the problems with the world's monetary systems or just ignore that part. And plenty of crooks and corrupt officials popping up every step of the way. Not so far from the way it is going in the US. Whoever said we were becoming a banana republic probably watched that movie.

I'm even wondering if some of the engineers of current policy didn't get their ideas from that classic flick. They certainly didn't pull the plan from "The Wealth of Nations", or anything by Milton Friedman.

Friday, April 10, 2009

The Manipulators Are At It Again

I see they are working up toward trying to convince people that only government workers should have guns. People you can trust. Too bad the whole concept of freedom and rights, and not recognizing the divine right of kings and upper castes has eluded the bulk of the world and the people in this country.

Why is it that when we were a budding agrarian country, whose citizens believed they needed firearms to keep the government honest, as well as to protect themselves, there was not the issue of kids punking out with firearms and homeowners afraid to prepare to protect themselves and their property?

No question that civilization's evolution has twisted matters considerably, and that movies and video games have put complete fiction and insanity in the minds of many. Obviously with the growth of the country has come a disproportionate amplification of the ranks of idiots. That is no reason to assume the official idiots have the authority to usurp the rights of the rest of the population to protect themselves against rogue tyranny and other criminals. Not to mention bears.

Just like the prelude to Iraq 1, and Bosnia, etc, it starts with clues in the media. After Viet Nam, no one imagined that any war which was not clearly a defense of the country would have the slightest support. Then they quit airing all the anti-war stuff and started having shows that made it look kind of fun. Pretty soon we were back to having a crop of kids about 18 or so thinking you go kick ass and no one can stop you.

Defense against rogue government is just about a thing of the past anyway. The new McCarthyism, Castroism, Stalinism policy in this country toward those who disagree with those in power is building steam and it could get dicey.

It's always a flip flop. You wait. I bet this administration ends up with more tangled overseas operations than we've ever had. people might join up just so they can have a gun since they are in the sights of the neo-prohibitionists. But don't expect any war, police action or involvement to have any conclusive outcome. That is not longer their purpose.

I don't mind reasonable reports and documentaries, but when the purpose and method is propaganda, and when they ignore some very basic principles, I find it disgusting.

It is stupid to have kids and guns together if a lot of hard core training and discipline are lacking. It is even dumber to have to hide it away if it is there for protection, which is wise in many cities. Hold on, Bad Guy, let me go unlock my gun down in the basement.

Oddly, the show that hit the nerve is showing how easy it is to buy guns, and I find that comforting. It makes me want to buy some guns before it becomes a thing that puts me on too many official lists. That's because I trust the general public more than the government. Gangs and crooks are a problem but the same as the thugs in power. I have noticed that they target regular people more than they really target gangs and true trouble. One obvious case of that was the Ramos-Compean debacle. The drug thug was protected and rewarded by our own government.

Speaking of which, Johnny Sutton is resigning. Perhaps he has a pot of gold waiting in some Mexican beach town as a reward. What a slime ball.

Lazy Day

It was slightly rainy and what I had to do wasn't all that much. So, I did what I needed or wanted to finish and took off early relative to most days. Usually I quit at dark. Today I don't think it was 5:00PM yet.

Times are tight and I hope not to have any unexpected expense. As I drove home I was thinking about that. Then I started looking around realizing how glad I am to be in the low mountains, how pretty it al is right now. It is hard to ward off concern and worry but stressing over it is not a plan of improvement. It is actually counter productive. For awhile I was able to just experience the experience and feel fortunate that I am here.

It's a constant confusion, knowing what is what. I started to better define that thought but decided to leave it at that. Understanding where true limits and capabilities lie is key to knowing if goals are pure insanity. Most of the time I find I can do more than I thought. It depends on the endeavor.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Head Banging

I just deleted a lengthy treatise on why energy development should be private, as in run by evil capitalists, and decentralized, as in figure a way to power the home, at the home, or the neighborhood, rather than be hostage to remote huge central sources. It's far more secure as well.

It is a waste of time to try to push such ideas. But it does seem like something is seriously wrong with the setup, as we know it, and definitely as the rest of the world knows it, or wants to.

When I mentioned the thought that I ought to figure out some sort of business venture to undertake, I was thinking more in terms of lucrative project. Something I would enjoy. A business like a bike shop or prostitution ring is not what I have in mind. Nothing against either of those enterprises, although I don't know how much true happiness can be had there. I guess the bicycle enthusiast and the hooker enthusiast find it worthwhile. I rarely see these bicycle people smiling though. They are all around here and have the expression that they are on a mission from Godt. Suicidal lot, I'll say that. We have ample lanes lined out but they still prefer the middle of the road in places which are not very safe.

As for hookers and their clients, I don't really know. I see what could be working girls around the area and some look happy enough, and ever so qualified. That profession covers a wide spectrum between the five dollar dumpster crack whore to sky's the limit, designer clad grad student. For varying reasons, I couldn't afford either one. Mentally, if nothing else. The idea of paying someone to like me seems a little depressing. Maybe if I were the one getting paid I'd view it differently.

I think I am overdoing it on this teak. How many times can you go back over something? How smooth can it be and how many microscopic little whatnots are you going to deal with? This stuff is beginning to look like it belongs in the house with the other multi big buck antiques and furniture that is too foo foo to even be utilitarian. I like crude, comfortable furniture. Maybe I'm just too clumsy for delicate fine things and dishes that break if looked at wrong.

My traffic treasure updates have fallen behind. I dodged a big box in the road but was going to fast to read what was possibly inside of it. Could have just been a rodeo clown practicing or something.

I neglected to mention the other day the pedestrian reported strolling in the median and another selling water on the on-ramp. They included those in the list of things on various roads. Today all I heard was that there were boxes somewhere, and a big planter. I'm not sure if the latter was a gardener, and maybe due to California law had to call himself a planter to avoid licensing.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

I Forgot

First thing I forgot was what I intended to write. Something was on my mind and seemed like an interesting topic. It wasn't even related to current political or collective madness.

The other thing I forgot was the name of a street in Memphis which is one of the main thoroughfares. I used to travel it frequently. I avoided it regularly. The thing that bothered me was that I could not call it to memory. There have been an increasing number of known things which I find temporarily unavailable when I call for them. That's disturbing. Sometimes I will be around people I know rather well, see frequently, and I will momentarily draw a blank on the name, or I'll feel uncertain about it. I've never been great with names but I knew the names of friends.

Just another of those things. It may be a reflection of the odd kind of stress I've placed on myself lately. Why would anyone indulge stress which could be avoidable or ignored? I don't know. Habit, maybe.

On the other hand, I am remembering more things of distant past, and see many of them in a slightly different light. Some of them are unchanged as far as my opinion and emotion. Mostly there is not much emotion involved. I guess worry is a reflection of fear, so I must be occupied keeping fear at bay. It's a mental exercise. If you are in a room with the walls closing in, the best course is to find an exit or a way to stop the trend. That's where thinking forward, conceiving new goals and endeavors probably pays off.

I think I need to figure out the what and how involved in starting my own business of some kind. Something less physical and more prone to increasing returns than straight job work. One guy can only do so much job work, and charge only so much. It is limited. I have no wish to build an employee heavy enterprise because it is not worth it when you consider the governmental hassles, tax issues and the headaches that come with most employees. I could care less about bossing people around. If others must be involved, I'd rather be the lead than the other way around, but that's not the nature of what I'm after.

Speaking of forgetting, I am in disbelief at this latest crop of Castro worshipping nincompoops. It just goes to show how low the bar really is when it comes to elected officials and others in political circles. Whether the embargo is backfiring or doing any good is one thing, to pretend that life for the average Cuban is equal to that of the overage American is nuts. Forgetting the way that country became a giant prison is dangerous. Of course the idiots who say that you have to crack some eggs if you are going to have a revolution, to justify his mass murder and firing squads are safely wealthy over here.

People were tricked. The wanted change and an end to corruption and such but they thought they were welcoming freedom when Fidel and Che swaggered into town. The got communist style socialism, and the cult of personality. Those places always post humongous portraits of the dictator and his chosen icons. Castro created the cult of Che, and some might argue he also was somewhat complicit in his demise. He became worth more to Fidel dead than alive. He could play him as a martyr to the Revolution and all that. Suckers around the world fell for it hook, line, and tee shirt.

It borders on criminal for people to go over there and fawn over the guy and his ideal state, especially if they are officials in our government. They are supposed to be about freedom and here they are praising the opposite and implying they'd love to institute similar policies and programs here. Oh, I guess they already are.

If you think all that "people's" this and that is glorious stuff, and that what we need is a glorious state like Cuba, just pray that you aren't one of the eggs that has to be cracked. And don't play the sax. They labeled instruments like that as symbols of capitalism, bourgeois, and wouldn't let them play. Cracking eggs was serious business. No time to play and have fun when the people's business needed doing.

I got off on a tangent there. Maybe my memory is not quite as selective as some. Those people get paid and make these trips on the taxpayer's nickel. If idiots like that can make a decent living, I ought to do OK. I'm not quite that idiotic.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Real Things amid the Biggest Mass Mind Control Ever

Last few days have yielded more road furniture and useful building materials right there on the highway for the taking. One report mentioned large boxes, so I count that as a grab bag special. No telling what was inside. It could be nothing or it could be dancing girls and a marching band. Wood and steel were in the road, in different places, and the ever popular couch. California is a different kind of place. But I like it, other than the ever growing volume of taxes and rules which only apply to citizens.

That should not be construed as a xenophobic outburst. I like Mexicans and tend to get along with the ones working in the area where I work. I'm one of the few Americanos who do labor intensive jobs there. There are a couple of others but they are more official and do things of slightly different nature. Foreign and domestic criminals I do not like. And I'm cold enough to think tax money ought not go to feed clothe educate or heal those who aren't citizens or at least here legally. Overall I think that whole issue is probably sort of a smokescreen for more diabolical mischief in power circles.

There is so much to do and experience out West. Freedom to do it is the real treasure. More and more that can mean you need money. Right now, you just need enough to have and hold a vehicle and put fuel in the tank. Lots of places to camp for free if you wind up homeless. Or if you want to escape.

That is a new way of thinking for me, to even consider where to pitch a tent. I learned it on the Ballistic Tour. It seems that people are far more serious about recreation out here. In the west, in general. I don't recall people on the east coast in such numbers just enjoying the nature of the place.

It is important to maintain mobility I think. That is not so easy to do, but so far it seems like it can be done. Easier to stay mobile than to get mobile. That's where having a cross country bike may pay off. If they make driving impossible, put on that pterodactyl looking hat tie the essentials to you back and go pedal across the mountains.

Hell of a thing that I'd even think that way in the 21st century. We should be floating around in 3D, flying cars or some such. But no, we're headed back before horses. You could get in trouble if you start riding a horse everywhere--only a matter of time before the horses-are-people-too people bring a class action suit or something. I bet people wouldn't be throwing furniture all over the road if it came to horses and bicycles.

A lady on George Noory's show claims she was taken to Mars, back in time, several million years. I couldn't follow the whole thing. Sounds like a good idea anyway. Maybe. It could be I found myself in another universe. This could be Mars. It's all adventure wherever it is. It takes some time to make sense of the customs and language. I've been wrestling with that all my life so that's no excuse to complain.

Money Saving

In case I find the irresistible Mrs Me; one big money saver is if she buys into the whole blood diamond thing. How in Hell can anyone ever buy a ring like I see on fingers everywhere in SoCal? Really, that item worries me and has for years. I just don't have the dough. I was watching a good looking news chick tonight and noticed a friggin ring that must have contained an once of gold and a forty carat diamond. I could be over estimating a tad, but even the news chick sets a bad example. So, to save money, ban diamonds.

To save on the cost of water I consider the entire world my urinal. It's a public service as much as anything, especially in an area that pumps water in from places like Colorado. Confuses the coyotes, too.

Don't do credit cards. They can end up charging a lot of money.

Figure out unit cost rather than suckering for the grocery store excitement sale labels. Often it is cheaper to buy 2 18oz jars of peanut butter than the 36oz economy size which has some hooplah tag on it. This is where mental division and accurate estimating pay off. They purposely price things in order to make it hard to quickly break down per unit. Some places have the unit cost in fine print on the price label, but not on the sale label.

Usually generic or store brand is cheaper than famous name brand.

Don't buy Marlboro.

Claim multiple personality disorder and list 2 or 3 of the distinct personalities as dependents.

Keep only pets that can be let outside, and which can find or hunt food on their own. Something like a badger, alley cat, raccoon, squirrel, wolf, owl, mountain lion, or wharf rat. If the animal has no health insurance, treat it as you would yourself, let it get well naturally or die.

Read your neighbor's newspaper

Forget cable, or watch it next door. Or, run a splitter from your neighbor's cable.

Carry a siphon hose at all times.

If you want to give flowers, visit the cemetery for a wide selection at no cost. Weekends and holidays are the best times. Hospitals can be a good source for fresh flowers as well.

Get my new piggy back green machine, a device designed to hook under the frame of the car in front of you. Throw 'er in neutral and experience the joy of extremely high gas mileage. Device comes with easy eject button should your unwitting benefactor turn off.

Run an extension cord from the outside outlet of your neighbor's house, or from nearby businesses to power lamps refrigerator and other electric hungry appliances.

Eat jalapeno peppers in winter to reduce the need for heating.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Never Ending Story, part Nth degree

For as long as I can recall there has been some kind of inner conflict going on. Most of the time I can't define it. Sometimes it is a battle between what makes sense to me and what keeps me from upsetting police. I almost almost subjugate my better judgement to the inferior course of action dictated by the people with the guns.

In retrospect I have often tossed better judgement aside in favor of the inferior course which seemed the majority way, the mainstream, normal thing. Half the time it wasn't at all the normal mainstream thing. Maybe it was just some sophisticated pretense that those wired for civilization as we know it understood. I have some little glitches which evidently are not so obvious, but which have thrown me way off course on a regular basis.

I can see the value in realizing the reality that life is not a practice round so regrets don't do much good. It still seems cruel that smoking doesn't win friends and build muscles, but that is how the game is laid out. Much of what I regret may have been a blessing. It is highly possible that I was never really capable of raising the seven children I wanted, and I probably would not have done well had I remained in various jobs, even though outwardly it appeared that I had promise and potential. You can be competent in some way but lack essential ingredients that would allow you to profit like you would were you not a few apples shy of a bushel, so to speak. It isn't a crime, just how it is. It has taken a long time to see that.

Every now and then the realization of limits, and more, the realization of times when I tried to ignore those limits, causes a little angst of one sort or another. That is the stuff that makes me want to hide away.

And that leads to a type of inner conflict. Accepting one's reality without accepting the wrong type of limitation. Opportunities are far more abundant than I know, almost by definition; I have no idea what all the possible inventions endeavors and schemes possible to a ballistic tourer are, so setting a mental limit is not even logical.

Yet, I do know I have limits on a certain aspect of understanding and reading people which either leads me to trust the untrustworthy or to see rejection when it is not there. That is somewhat more extreme than average. On the other hand I can spot it when someone else is up to no good in matters between others, in which I have no vested interest. I think some of that is normal.

What is not normal are the extremes which have characterized some episodes of my life dealing with such matters. Not a reason for regret because it does not good, and it wastes time and energy as the woe erodes attitude, diminishing the likelihood of recognizing good opportunities. Such regret and sadness over what should have been another way serves only to destroy the contentment of the moment. That is not to say conscience is no good. I'm not talking conscience.

I don't know what I'm talking. But here's a secret teak trick; after all is done and you coated it with teak oil, come back and rub a final coat in with #400 wet or dry sandpaper. It is the way to make things dazzle and be smooth as [name withheld]'s bottom.

Dreaming, the Nerve

Although I'm assuming those, who wake up every day in tax paid comfort wondering how they can fight to make the little nobody's life better today, consider me among the poor downtrodden retches, I find more solace when I find a glimmer of hope to make something happen myself. Partly because my daydreams of productive adventure do not include special ID, waiting in line, or asking permission.

Interesting psychology in that dynamic; "I'm fighting for every hopeless, miserable son of a bitch out there numbing his mind with booze and TV". There is that implication that the one thinking so intently about the plight of the little people is a superior being. Maybe even a God.

Well, I began to envision possibilities again. They may or may not work. Only one way to find out. Half the time, attempting to achieve one goal ends up resulting in a different end altogether, as adjustments along the way change the course. It can be better than plan A. The only way to determine if the goal is attainable or not is to go for it, given that a little forethought has gone into the scheme.

The main ingredient needed to launch an idea is nerve. I think I lost the will to force myself to call on The Nerve a long time ago. I've never really accepted that I would always live in a state of surrender, though. But I haven't quite been willing up until now. I'm not sure if I'm willing to let go of the inhibition at this point. In my dreams I am, and that feels much better than no picture of it at all.

The projects I actually think of aren't really the ones I describe to others. Those may hold some interest, but they aren't the ones in the dreams which feel more liberating, fun, and in sync with my nature.

It feels good to see a course of action which could pay off to some extent, and which may actually be possible. The steps toward it are fairly straight forward. I love it when I can see the way, even if I wonder where I'll get the time and energy.

Somehow that talk of fighting for me seems at odds with the creative process of finding a way to thrive. The mental state it takes to want people you don't even know to wake up thinking how they can control your life in ways they think you want is one of deep depression. It is no wonder it is easier to say, "I'm lost and I'll never be otherwise" than it is to say, "I think I have a plan and it's just crazy enough in might work. I may yet thrive". People view the thriver with resentment and/or suspicion, and the one who's spirit is broken with relief and gratitude. Like family. It's like we've become conditioned to believe we are supposed to have no spirit, and that trying to regain it is futile.

Admittedly the deck is heavily stacked against rebirth and revival of will, but it is probably possible. I hope so.

Just thinking. And it did feel good to muse over possible paths and opportunities again. I'd just come off a jag of fear and loathing. The battle is always between freaking out over my lack of security, what I don't have, can't do, and what is good, what I do have and can do. I'm of the belief that if I keep putting the idea of being some benefit to people who matter up on the front burner, things will be OK. It's a balance, and you never really know when you are a benefit, even though you may think you know. It pays to keep a pure heart. Those times when you think it doesn't always come back to haunt you.

If you make sense out of that then I'm surprised and happy.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Clearing The Mind Clutter; Coast to Coast

The benefit of working until dark is that I can often listen to Coast to Coast radio on the way home. When I decide I don't want to hear any more of the latest Obama adventures into global madness and the oneness of statism, this is a good way to clear my mind.

Tonight, being Saturday, they have old Art Bell episodes. I prefer the ones post 911 for some reason. It appears things just aren't the same since then and things prior to that date feel like another world; one that is gone for good. We've been on the rapid move toward fascism and socialism ever since, and willingly so. At least enough were willing that questioning things paints one as a fringe character, domestic terror risk, probable militia member, or outright kook. Even so, I don't feel as comfortable listening to anything pre-911. Nostalgia makes me uncomfortable. Good memories are fine but I find reliving some things depressing. I'm more nostalgic for times prior to my birth, so I guess it doesn't qualify as nostalgia or living in my own past.

OK. So, tonight's episode was from 2002. I don't know the name of the guest or even what his particular specialty is/was. At one point they were talking about finds in N.America of large, 7 or 8 foot, humanoid skeletons in burial mounds, and other organized spots for placing the quiet and inactive of our neighbors.

The Art guest claimed there were pre-existing mines under the ones we made when first mining coal and copper and such. All this indicated a sophisticated society predating even most of what we think of as Native Americans. Most cultures, even oldie goldies, came from some place else, then they got displaced by some interloper group, and sometimes that group fell to yet other interlopers. Modern bad guys, the evil us, aren't really the only beneficiaries, in history, of good land got by overrunning the less astute in the ways of war or technology, or simply taking advantage of the power greater numbers can bring.

That's the trouble with modern civilization, one of the ills anyway; people are all hell bent on being the holy tribe. So, in our case, first those who sailed from Europe were conquering heroes, the Chosen tribe, then the tide turned so that the vanquished became the holy ones. A lot of truth and a lot of bullshit in both cases. The main point is that there is always a need to have a villain and an innocent victim. Fact and nuance be damned.

No telling if any of what they were discussing has any validity, but it does give a sense of the flow in the dog eat dog world of the population and development of the planet. Now that everyone knows it is round and roughly where everything is, it takes the charm out of conquering the infidel. Or so you'd think. The game and the rules, if any, have changed. In a way I'd love to live to see it all, and then again, I'm happy to know I won't.

Here we go. I went from Art Bell and Atlantis or shadow people right back to raging against the things that I was trying to avoid. This could be serious. It's why people spend lots of time doing church stuff. Obviously I'm unbalanced.

This is what drives people to sail the oceans in a 20' boat. It takes forever, you might not make it, and you have too much reality to occupy your mind to be concerned with the insanity of governments and people who like to run the lives of others. And steal their money and loved ones.

At least I have one useful tip; the True Value in the nearby town sells Watco Teak Oil for over 50 cents less than the Poway Home Depot. That's a tip you can take to the bank.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Green, another word for righteous inferiority

Clean water is great. I like water that won't kill me or leave me glowing in the dark, although it would save on flashlight batteries. Of course clean water is not green. I normally won't drink green water.

It may be more a left coast phenomenon but I suspect the whole country (and many others) has found shelves stocked with Green products which tout their greenness rather than their effectiveness. It is rare that things which say right on the label, "Green, earth friendly, no animals trees, chemicals or anything else used in this product. It won't hurt anything and you can eat it safely", are worth the money. I'm beginning to think that companies which have an abundance of products which don't work are slapping "We're Green" labels on them to exploit the madness and recoup the investment in bad goods.

People feel good that they are somehow honoring the earth goddess by sacrificing money and usefulness with such purchases. They generally don't feel great that the cleaners won't clean.

I'm sure there are some great substances which include only ingredients like eggs and lemons which do work for a specific purpose, although I am hard pressed to name them at the moment. But by godt, we are being good to The Earth, which, of course, we all love dearly. When you really think about it honestly, it is a love-hate situation.

Everyone loves the earth when insulated from its wrath, whether it be little bitey bugs, cold, hot, rain, toranadoes, earth quakes, fires, animals that want to eat you or your food, land that can't be tread in its natural state, etc. The entire game of being human is to protect ourselves from Mommy Dearest--The Earth--so we can mate in clean comfort.

We may as well like it because it is the only planet we have, for now. Loving it or hating it makes no sense to me. Not destroying any source of resources is just rational self interest. Worshipping it and feeling guilty for making use of what's here or for making life a little tougher for creatures who would love to eat us does not seem natural or reasonable.

If people truly want to get back to nature they'd be chasing away every creature that gets in the way, and they'd clear tons of fire breaks in the forest and brush, and make sure their own species comes out on top, with no shred of guilt. Nature is about beating the other life forms in the game and ensuring survival of the species. That's what every life form does to some degree. All they care about is making more of their own. Sometimes a cooperative interaction serves the purpose. Humans and dogs, horses, cows, pigs, etc.; those fish that clean barnacles of other fish, or whatever the deal is.

Not every effective chemical, which one way or another came from the earth, is a sinful devil potion. It takes very little for things to earn that label though. I remember in the 70's when some members of Congress insisted we not allow or work with Boeing in the launch of their SST because they claimed super sonic transports would cause skin cancer and other ills. I'm not making this up. Of course then that opened the door for the French thing that managed to fly here for awhile. Boeing's looked like it would have been a better aircraft.

There is a balance, and it is not anywhere to be seen. Ruining a water supply and such is not good sense, but withholding worthwhile remedies and processes which actually save lives and enhance standard of living makes no sense either. Much of that thinking has only kept primitive third world cultures in poverty more than would be the case if a little evil chemical had been used. In many cases the "science" which was cited to ban a very useful product proved bogus and agenda driven.

More and more the cries for tiptoeing around the holy environment push practices which aren't natural at all. I don't think one could say that forced socialism is at all natural either. Free trade and barter of one's own volition is natural. If 50 people were somehow isolated in the woods with nothing, pretty soon those good at one thing would be trading that for goods and services produced by people good at that. Some would do more building, some more hunting or gathering, and so it goes. Those who couldn't contribute would probably be cared for if they had a decent attitude. It's human nature, but it is by choice.

I don't think the mass hysteria will last forever. I hope the class envy thing ceases before long. That is dangerous.

OK. I'm rambling, but the various elements of passing off tomato juice as dishwashing liquid, and confiscation of wealth and arbitrary distribution of same as humane, seem to reflect a similar mentality. It is somewhat oppressive and no fun.

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Ballistic Mountain, CA, United States
Like spring on a summer's day


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