Monday, February 28, 2011

Holy Rolling Gig Wed

Never would I have guessed I'd be paid to play a fundraiser for a church. Lutherans. GV1 and his wife go there so that is how it all started.

Surprising to me is the fact that I find their pastor an interesting and down to earth guy. He's the sort I could be friends with. I am just probably not on the same page in a churchy way.

I played some odd fundraisers in Memphis, too. The closest to a holy thing was a fundraiser for a Jewish private school. They may not have been that into us. I found the Japanese wedding gig a little bit of an odd fit as well. They were very nice and polite, of course.

We had our last practice tonight. This time we were unplugged. Usually we have the stuff set up and the monitors hooked up. This time, no. It went very well, I thought. I worked on a few things on my own which I wasn't happy with the last time we practiced. It paid off.

It was probably good that this practice got put off a couple of days, and that we have an off day in between. That is better sometimes. As long as everyone has fun. it will go well. It may be that I can help take the lead in the attitude department.

I'm looking forward to this. We have plenty of material. Our first set is just short of an hour non-stop. That's a pretty good set. I love going an hour or more per set but I haven't been in that situation in forever. The Memphis boys were fond of short sets. 45 minutes would be a long set for them. Not that they didn't work hard when playing. And sometimes the noise triggered something that made me dizzy and the sounds all got weird.

This ought to be interesting. I just hope there will be some people who appreciate it. We'll see. My friends are good singers with some really great harmonies, and the guitar players do not play out of tune. They often catch it before I do.

***according to GV1, you know how to spot an extroverted Lutheran? It's one who looks at your shoes when talking with you.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

They Give Two Sides and I Reject Both

What I find most troubling about the Wisconsin hooplah is that both sides of the alleged issue have eagerly sought and been flooded with support and opinions from outside the state. People have actually gone there to push their views on that state's business.

It is a very good example of one of the problems in modern America. People decide everyone else's business is theirs and think if they make enough noise they will get their way, even when it is not their tax money at stake, their job, their community, their state. At least ninety percent have not read whatever legislation is on the board.

I see it as a negative development that outsiders on both sides of the issue have insinuated themselves so heavily into a matter that is not really their affair. They can rationalize all they want, but I am unswayed in this view. It may feel good to have famous figures share the spotlight with you when you have some point of view on a local matter, but it is a trap. Who in New Hampshire or Texas would want people from California weighing in on their business?

We aren't talking of situations of involuntary servitude or conflict with equal protection under the law, or massacre of citizens. It just doesn't cross those lines. It is not for those who don't work, pay taxes, or vote there to decide.

In thinking of how this thought could be argued, I realized how easy it is to justify intruding on others by rationalizing that their actions somehow affect my well being. Or better yet, the welfare of The Children (closely related to the ubiquitous THEY). That reasoning allows me to exert authority over everyone everywhere. It's that butterfly effect thing.

ballistic mtn 2-28-2011

Big deal in the land of perpetual summer, near the land of perpetual spring. (out here vs coast).
In San Diego a rain shower is a winter storm.
First good snow since I've been here. It will soon melt.
I wish I hadn't partially swept off the car prior to this. It was dramatic.

update: Now it is a pure blue sky, bright sun and maybe 50 degrees or so. Never have I lived anywhere that had so many pure blue sky days. But something is different. maybe the fact that I'm thousands of miles from the Gulf Stream. I need a road trip to settle if what I feel or remember is real or imagined.
It is easy to forget that Miami is ultra hectic and peopled by the unbalanced and loud for the most part, or that there are other complications elsewhere in the east. When you are a misfit, it follows you no matter where you go. At least it does me, so far.
I periodically get freaked out about it. I never feel like I fit and I am almost sure it is my doing, but how to undo it?

It's a beautiful day and hordes of cityots have descended upon Pine Valley and points north and east to see the snow, throw snowballs at their kids, and drive two inches behind the car ahead of them.
I took a brief tour this morning and came back home. They don't know about Ballistic Mountain or they'd be sliding up our hill.

Winter Storm On Thee Ate

Not too steady with the phone camera as I risked the perils of wintry mix and snowy ice on Thee Ate (California speak for I-8).
This is just past the Descanso exit heading east on Thee Ate. I was going to Pine Valley where there was a nice blanket of crisp crunchy snow. This was just at sundown.

Originally I took the Descanso exit in order to take the scenic route but I saw a sign which said something about chains. I have none so I got back on the highway. It seems that California is big on wanting you to have chains anywhere the weather gets interesting. My natural Subris causes me to think I should be exempt. Subris is the condition that makes Subaru drivers think they can drive in anything without the usual perils. False sense of whatever. I heard that term and thought it was a great word. I believe Scribbler was the one who educated me about that.

Maybe in some locations Subaru people are like Jeep people in Greensboro. They seemed to find out the hard way that everyone has four wheel brakes and that their 4x4 Jeeps have no advantage when it comes to stopping on ice. Every winter the Jeep body shop was loaded. You'd see them come by on tow trucks right and left.

Finally Ballistic Mountain got some snow. It has covered everything nicely. It didn't get to us until late at night. Around here the weather varies every couple of miles. It is amazing.

On the way back, the few people on Thee Ate were traveling between 35 and 40 mph. It was snowy and kind of icy, and hard to see where lanes divided. No matter. There was still one guy who was tailgating people but would not pass unless there was a faster car to go tailgate.

I even saw a snow plow on the country road that leads to Ballistic road. Who knew they had such things in SD county? Not me.
It will most likely be gone tomorrow. I'm in no hurry for our little hint of cold weather to go.

According to the radio there was a three car accident at the Descanso exit. I'm assuming it happened right after I got off there. It could be the news was way behind and it happened and hour earlier. No doubt someone was way too close to someone else. maybe two people were too close. Traffic was minimal. Very few people on Thee Ate as I returned home.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

I Try Not To Talk Revolution or Politics

It is true. I write about those things a lot. Not revolution so much because only one in ten thousand people would have the slightest idea how such a thing should be conducted. Most revolutions are made up of whores, pure and simple. That is why they usually sell out the people who made it possible. Like in Cuba--no one thought Fidel and his sociopathic buddy, Che, were going to install boot-on-your-head communism, comrade. They thought it was about reinstating their constitution and functioning as a democratic republic with guidelines and all that. They were duped. And the power came from the whoreswho are for anything that gains approval of the mob, and that feels like power. It snowballs. They follow the noise.

Reduction of the power of The Man, OK. Revolution, like toppling the whole thing, is probably a bad goal. I still do not comprehend why there is as much war and chaos in the world as there is. I don't think it is necessary. Governments seem to thrive on it, and quite often misguided religious zealots help it along.

Anyway, I actually keep it at a minimum most of the time. I might have to throw a stick in the spokes when someone makes a standard scripted comment regarding some person or movement, and I will embarrass them if I can by pinning them down on why this person is an idiot or that movement is whatever. Usually I just point out a specific point and say I agree with it. It is not cool or hip, but it gets off of the stupid practice of personal attack and generalizing based on repeated slogans rather than reason.

Much of the time things under discussion provoke reactions which aren't rooted in fact. The other thing is that not everyone has the same views regarding right and wrong. If you differ on the most essential of those principles, then you are reasoning from conflicting premises. The most basic being:At what point is it my right to curb your behavior on matters I personally consider wrong, distasteful or inappropriate? I tend to think I don't have very much latitude on that. What you eat or do with your pregnancy or put into your body isn't my affair if you don't do it in such a way that it crosses over into infringing on me personally.
Stealing and murder obviously cross the line.

It is one thing to write about it but rarely that much fun in one on one verbal discourse. When I forget that, I regret it. I try, but don't always exercise restraint. You can vote how you want and all that. I almost never ask a person how they voted or if they did. It's supposed to be secret ballot, and it is none of my business.

When the rules and regs are impossible to ignore, it is not easy to refrain from being overcome with an opinion about it. Those things generally bother the less powerful and those not locked into jobs with certain types of companies and institutions. The level of underground economy is something few people recognize. I think it is one reason for turning a blind eye to a lot of work done by illegals. They don't need no steenkeeng regulations to tell them how and if they can make and use the secret formula consisting of gasoline, roofing tar, etc., to create the desired look on the cedar garage doors. No way any state agency would approve it. Even so, there it is. You cannot be 100% legit and compete for that job.

I've managed to get a supplier and lessons in case I ever have to use that nasty stuff again, but I know I am doing something that would send the officials into heart arrest if they were watching. It is not so easy living on the fringe.

Many would say, "You should have thought of that when you quit that job or didn't finish the degree, etc." To them I say, Yea, I'm sure you are right--F--- off. The "you should have thought of that before" argument has never been one of my favorites. Especially coming from people who support the things that have given rise to a house of cards economy and an overreaching governing philosophy.

Easy to say here. In person I guess it is easiest to say, "Thank you for your insight and concern". The sarcasm is probably not always lost.

Friday, February 25, 2011

Who You Gonna Believe--your own eyes or me???

That is essentially what we are being asked on the level of government in this country. On just about every level, from city to state to national level, the obvious bizarre pretense is the same. And it is beyond comprehension that it is allowed.

It is definitely a case of The Emperor's New Clothes. How can city after city, and state after state be in such debt? If they were private companies, they'd all have gone belly up. What is bizarre is that the same people, in a general way, who ran things up like this are the same ones proclaiming that "we need to sacrifice", etc. All act somewhat baffled; how to fix it while still keeping on expenditures which tend to buy votes?

Of course, some of the groups who have benefited personally from bankrupting the country either turn a blind eye to avoid confronting the moral issues, or they rationalize from false premises and feel good slogans, or they just stick with the idea that it is right to get what you can for yourself regardless of expense to others--as long as it is legal. What's more legal than government money?

It is a pure insult and a show of colossal disrespect for citizens to act like everything has just happened in the short term, and that it is the fault of the economy, George Bush, etc. It has been underway for some time, and the alleged fixes have thrown fuel on the fire.

It makes me feel bad to see how we've been duped, and how we keep coming back for more, following the little crumbs tossed out. Some are in the form of money, especially for public service employees, and some is in the form of sticking it to the mythical class known as "the rich".

That is why I would not begin to vote in favor of a "temporary tax hike" like Gov Brown has suggested, or any other inconvenience to private sector citizens. The problem is government itself, pure and simple. That, and the willingness of the public to compromise principle in hopes of class revenge or some undeserved personal gain.

It really is a wild scenario. I'm curious to see how it all goes. It is not a system of things in which the players are contained within national boundaries, so actually following the money and motives is much more difficult than some think. I can't follow it, but I can see the ripples and many of the actions which result in these "Crises".

Always a crisis. That gives rise to any action the powers that be want to execute. And the public somehow goes with it. Admittedly, we are ultimately at gunpoint, but plenty just hope to get along, stay off their radar, and get what they can for themselves and their families. It is natural, but, I believe, disastrous in the long run.

We're over a barrel. How do you undo and defund these psychopaths? We have fanatics around the world who want us dead, and troops spread from here to Bosnia, and beyond. Our debt is as stretched as our military, and as planted on foreign soil.
The only way to feel good about this is to pretend. History indicates that republicans don't necessarily stand up to this much more than democrats. It is a game. Blame Bush, but forget the dems had Congress for the last part of his tenure.

Drastic action is the only real hope. The logical things would not set well with environmental groups, public employee unions and all kinds of others. But it actually would be possible to revive the domestic product, balance of trade and reduce dependence upon oil imports. Wouldn't happen overnight, but it could be done rapidly. Our population's character is not yet moral enough to allow it. For one thing the state sponsored and instigated tribalism, racism and sexism would have to stop. Either it is blind equality under the law or it is not. You cannot pretend that favoritism to any group based on sex or ethnicity or whatever else is irrelevant in any way speaks to the natural rights of all or the concept of equal under the law.

Drastic things will happen anyway. They already have. Whatever the impetus, is the Homeland Security dept and TSA procedures, and multi department exercises which raid businesses and such not drastic? I guess if you've never known anything freer and less intrusive, you don't realize what has happened, and how quickly.

I will live as I see fit, as always. And I am not rabidly emotional over this stuff like it may seem. I'm just curious to see what is next, and wish I could anticipate it in a way that would make me money without it being tax dollars.

It is not a surprise, though, to see the financial distress which has swept all these bogus governments. No more surprising than maxing out credit cards, spending more than you have, and agreeing to a mass of payments which add up to more than you have coming in, then you find yourself in big financial trouble. How shocking.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Strange Wind Blowing

Once upon a time I assumed that everyone believed in live and let live freedom. I thought everyone at least thought basic do-not-steal honesty was a good thing. Or almost everyone. I thought good people felt honor bound not to dictate to others how they must use their resources and property, and that they would never go along with things which enriched themselves at the clear expense, and over the protests, of others.

I was wrong. There are some people who think that the way to freedom is through control over others and their property. Then there are those who don't think that way. Some seem to fall in the middle because they'd still get gung ho on drug laws and support police abuse of the 4th amendment. And they think of the "unborn" as an abused minority group. I'm sorry, but that is one place I part ways with many who agree on other issues. Like it or not, and I am no big fan of it, but abortion ought to be off the table as far as outlawing, or funding. Nothing wrong with buying it on time. But using tax money for that is forcing the point.

I will say, despite how many have decided to look at the issue, I consider it a blessing when some people opt not to multiply, even if the ball was rolling. Seriously, let it go. I probably would not perform one but I sure don't see it as my business if I am not involved. I don't care to pay for it myself, but I don't think a lot of things should be tax funded. No surprise there.

The interesting thing to watch is to see how far the mob action thing goes. There is a fine line between reasoned dissent and mob abuse. To describe every riot or chanting mob as what democracy looks like is a stretch I think. Sometimes it is what a bully looks like.

The things that strike me the most are when it degenerates down to personalities, avoiding the true issue at hand. That is usually what happens. It preps the people to look for a savior to love, a leader, a king, a despot. First focus their ire on one person, then their love on another. Forget the actual morality or philosophy, or even the facts.

It's OK. As long as you can say you stand in SOLIDARITY with the union or whoever, it is always cool. The word "solidarity" is one of those unassailable terms of our times which has taken on the magic of holiness. To question what the hell that means or exactly why, I, in California would stand with people I don't know regarding issues and bills I haven't read, or regarding people and cultures I cannot honestly say I understand, would throw up my fist and proclaim my solidarity when I don't really know the philosophy or moral ground involved is considered sacrilege.
(no way I am going back to figure that sentence out so I can fix it)
They cried "solidarity" first, so I have to be one with that side. It's like calling shotgun, or dibs.

It's like those who chant union slogans and don't care if the union is right, wrong, run by mobsters, or anything else.

So. Where is it going to lead? You know there are millions of people who can't wait to find a chance to be on the news, stand in the middle with the megaphone, feel like they are a part of whatever it is. The thrill of the mob, and the self righteous zeal of the protest. I'm not saying I agree or disagree with everything that draws a crowd. I do always resent people with megaphones who shout, expecting the mob to shout a preset response, or repeat as told.

It is the difference in some basic makeup of people. I know many who relish the crowd and the loud dissent, even if it drowns out discussion. I don't fall into that group. But I don't fall into the group who reveres the police and every law on the books either. Some are OK. Most are not--in both cases.

Personally, I do not trust what is going on around the world, or at home. I only wish I had my secret bunker with ten years of good food, and other stuff in there.

They're gearing up for something stupid--I just have a hunch. No doubt it wil be glorified later as for the greater good, our safety, security, economic well being-- who knows? On the official level the reasons, the cause and effect, are always 180 degrees from what is said. (that means opposite for the compass degree challenged)

What people don't realize about mobs is that as dangerous or powerful as they can be, they can also be very easily manipulated and controlled. Rule of thumb on mob mentality is that a mob of geniuses becomes an entity with an IQ of about 82.5. It is true. It works just like committees comprised of more than 3 or 4 people. The level of intelligence is about 2/3 that of the weakest link. Can't do anything about it. That's why sub-committees were invented. The moral quotient weakens along the same curve as the smarts, as well.

I don't know. Just seems like some odd stuff all happening at once. I'm not chalking it up to a sudden mass elevation in awareness level of humanity. That would be nice, but I am not feeling it.

Pale and Pail; no, not equal

Several times lately I've seen the word "pail" used as a verb where "pale" would be correct.

Dear AP, and others--Pail= a bucket, container
Pale = lacking color, vigor {as in "that pales in comparison to his last outburst"]
also as in "Are you felling well? You look PALE"
= fence stake or boundary {as in "beyond the pale"]

Normally these things don't bug me, but there are times. It is what we get for A. spellcheck, B. the fact that most people ain't got good larnin' in the pubic skoos.

I catch myself writing phonetically all the time. And many times I do not catch it. When I see it I know. I believe most of the errors I'm mentioning here are cases of not knowing the difference. It happens.

While I'm at it, (and I, too, lack the education I think fitting a person of my stature) let's take a look at "then" and "than"
Then deals with sequence and time--as in first I punched him the nose, and THEN he shot me.
Than ideals with comparison---as in, "He announced to the entire locker room 'mine is bigger THAN yours'".
or, "I'd rather be a hammer THAN a nail"

Valley girl speak sometimes confuses the vowels A and E, so it is natural that the spelling and context of words gets screwed up in print. "she's my best girl frand, gah" "He is rally rally cute"

Oh The Humanity!

What has become of me? I'm beginning to think I have found a different edge from the one I tried not to go over sometime ago. I'm almost getting fat, though that is merely a side effect.

I realized that I was looking for the grits because I am becoming an insomniac who seeks fatso comfort food. Still, that is not so bad. I like grits, and I'm not actually fat. I'm borderline on having to wear size 33" waist pants instead of 32. Mostly butt taking up the space I think. That sounds silly and it is. This is the edge I'm treading; bizarre, vain, and sad considerations occupying my time, rather than money making frustrations, day trading, or selling used vacuum cleaners that I find and fix.

So, I wanted to read the instructions on the grits because I forget if you boil the water first or heat it with grits in place. Because I don't want to turn on the kitchen track lights which would mean three 100 watt spotlights sucking down electricity, I carry the bag over to the bed where the floor lamp with one squiggly bulb which pulls 23 watts (supposed to replace normal 60 watter) resides.

Later I go to check the water, now boiling on the very slow two burner hot plate, and can't find the grits. Oh, there they are sitting on my bed. Then it struck me, I may not be normal. No wonder the horde of wild women I would think would be after me are not beating down my door. If they could weave their way through the junk upon entry, they'd find a bag of grits on my bed, along with some clean clothes, a towel, and other textiles piled up on one corner.

The up side is that if the feds ever nail me for not knowing how to approach taxes or other official matters, I can present a strong case of being too nuts to know better.

For some reason, when I looked over and saw that I left the bag of grits on the bed, I felt it was a sign. Something was telling me I am not properly organized and perhaps my life is mixed up. It is not the ultra dark place where I dwelt so long before leaving Memphis, so that is a relief. It is also something good to remember. My biggest fear upon setting out for new horizons was that I would bring the part of me that can never get it right along. Of course, I knew I couldn't run away from myself. I was more trying to assert a form of control over my mind and destiny. It worked to a point. But once I stop moving, I am always in danger.

I think there are ways to manage this issue, if I could get the nerve and discipline to do it right, but there is probably no curing it. I'll always be the guy with grits on his bed because he doesn't want his utilities-included rent to go up. I've even considered using the camp stove instead of the electric hot plate thing to save energy--and because it is about 20 times faster.

If I were a junkie or a drunk, this would all make sense. As it is I have no excuse, except the one I'd use in court, should the need arise. And it wouldn't even be a lie. I simply am no good at taking care of my basic self. That was obvious as soon as I became unmarried a lifetime ago. But I haven't been too willing to let any interested parties get overly involved because I also have an aversion to judgement, or someone taking over based on half true assumptions, or later using it all as ammunition against me in some crazy campaign of defamation.

In the mean time, we tested our PA on site for the upcoming church fundraiser, praise be to [deity of your choice]. We're using GV1's system, rather than that of the holy place. Despite the work involved, and the distance of the place, he correctly reasoned that it would be good to know how it will sound, if it is adequate, and if there are problems so that we can correct what needs it. By doing it now, we have time.

GV1 is my new name for the guitar vocal guy in this group. One of them anyway. G1 is from the Memphis band.

I could not believe how well it all worked. No matter where you sit in the place, the sound balance is the same, and the volume is close to the same. And the monitors were great as well. I don't think adding people to place will influence it much---unless they are chattering and being a problem. I have a stick in my car I can use to make them behave if need be.

The big trouble is I sometimes lose all faith in my skills. I'm such a jammer at heart and this is not jammer type of play. It is good to be able to do it, but it is sometimes worrisome to me. I often play things that suck. The next time I might nail it. I seem to lack consistency and it all appears to depend upon my inner state of mind, even more than practice. The goal is to help enhance the sound of the group, not detract.

Got to get a place set up to work on harps. Seen the price of harmonicas lately? Through the friggin roof. I can't find my Lee Oskar tool kit but it is around here somewhere. It has all the things you need for most harp work. I could make good harps out of the dozens I have with stuck or out of tune reeds. The problem with having a good ear is that you know when one is beginning to go south. The trick is to play whatever position requires the most bends so you can hit the right note. If it is a bend note you just make it work. Maybe it is just me, but it seems that harp playing depends upon a lot of faking it.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Conspiracy Theories ????

How I stumble on these things, I have no idea. I don't actually do that much internet stumbling. I'm tired to of the term, "Surfing the internet". I always hear voices from the late 90's in my mind, who actually knew nothing about it but, for political reasons, wanted to sound hip.

Once in awhile you land on videos and information which really stretches credibility; both in the content, and the idea that the person who made the video could be serious.

Did you know that there are people who claim the Denver airport is full of things pertaining to everything from black ops, to the apocalypse? Yep, the murals are all about it.

One guy says the leopard in one of the murals, " represents Barack Obama". And the two cubs in the painting are his kids. They seem to have left Michele out. I guess she was off hunting for some lean meat while he spent quality time with the cubs.

If someone in a mural is wearing a hat, the guy insists it is a halo. He uses the word, "obviously" to describe the not-remotely-obvious. "See that rock? It is really disguising human degenerates who bear the sign of the beast".**
**not actual quote--artist's impression to give the idea

The Denver airport theories have grabbed several different people. It seems there is the new world order school, which swears the symbols and pictures spell out their intent, and the revelations crowd who bend it all to fit their bent idea of Biblical doom. I think these people sound dangerous, but I wouldn't start making laws or censoring them.

I'll just say it right here: You can make any prophesy come true if you try. I simply do not buy most of the stuff I hear regarding beast marks and all that. You can read Ayn Rand, George Orwell, Aldous Huxley, and others and come up with foretellings of the future at least as accurate as the ones crazy superstitious pretend holy people come up with. Should we then think of those people as holy? We can get all wound up in "be gone, ye, satan!!" talk, and all that.

I've no doubt that conspiracies exist. I remembering conspiring with others at times in my past. Sometimes it was for noble purpose, and sometimes not. Suspecting a conspiracy does not automatically make you nuts. There are other criteria for that.

This guy is nuts--click here to see for yourself

What I like is how he cites his research; "according to my sources on the internet..". OK. According to my sources on the internet I'm the real Slim Shady.

I see a butterfly in any mural, I automatically say, "that OBVIOUSLY represents Louis XVI, the dead French King."

The usefulness of nuts like this self=proclaimed "Third Eagle of the Apocalypse, and the co-prophet of the end times", is that it makes anyone who distrusts the established order of things look like a complete nincompoop. So, they are actually useful to equally wacko government wanks.

It is a little unsettling to realize just how far out there some people are. Many do it under the guise of a gruesome brand of religiosity. No way to reason with that. But, if you wanted to manipulate events, they could be quite useful. Even if one believes we are under threat from Islam fanatics, you have to see that much can be done under the guise of fighting them, and that it is quite easy to abuse the assumption of a nebulous enemy. Unfamiliar fanatics are pretty scary. The stonings and other Dark Ages throw backs tend to get one's attention. A very useful enemy with a well deserved image of being backward, superstitious, homicidal lunatics. The most useful thing is that this enemy can be anywhere. It may be you. This enemy is so useful it gives an excuse to government to ignore any of your rights it chooses. And the graft and corruption it enables goes equally as far.

It is a strange thing to see. A government which decries terrorism and oppression continues to fund the irs, make very liberal use of eminent domain powers, and tends to misuse and abuse its own military (misues by sending into strange undeclared wars under bizarre restraints, then jail their own for self defense or on hearsay charges from the enemy that they are meanies) is one that would give rise to theories of all sorts. No other way to make sense of it. It certainly does not stand up to logical scrutiny on face value.

I may think the man is my philosophical opposite in the realm of politics, but I don't think he's the anti-christ or any other macabre biblical player. And certainly not the leopard in a mural of mayans and corn fields. That gave gave me the creeps with his pretense of the mural being a warning to Obama. I guess he thinks some god put the stuff in the Denver airport.

Oh, I forgot, he seems to have a question regarding if the murals are the work of Satan, or from God. See, that is the kind of talk I find disgustingly weird, and somehow dangerous. They decide you are "of the devil" they can get in self righteous rage and kill you in the name of the lord. I do not buy any of that bunk.

Whatever of the bible is true has been totally misshaped and twisted by holy men through the ages. And despite the fact they've been around thousands of years, I do think they are wrong and I am right. Half truths tend to carry further with the masses than whole truths. Got to give credit for some truth being in there.

Beware Denver airport. That's the long and short of it. Who knew?

This has been a public service documentary by Me; bird of prey, in some order, of the apocalypse, and a prophet of Christmas future, if you'll sucker for that title

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Practice Doesn't Always Make Perfect, etc.

Tonight was one of the most disjointed practices ever. I think I know why, but that is best left unremarked. For my part, I just did not feel too zippy or with it. No one really did. Very odd.

When you are running out of time before a gig, and you do the kind of stuff that is not a platform for ad-lib, then it is best not to change things or cast doubt where none existed. Just saying.

I've got the ability to keep trucking after a mistake so it will be OK. But I am not so much of a singer and I am doing some singing. If only I could do that high pitched scream thing. No way I'd want to do the American Idol pop/broadway hybrid style. It takes talent but it usually lacks the stuff of true soul or blues or whatever is born of emotion. It tends to be a technical, computer generated algorithm which results in how emotion should sound. Not always, but plenty. I quit watching it long ago, and only did for awhile, which means my assessment cannot be taken as thoroughly researched and valid. Though it may be accurate. Who knows?
Note to lady staying at Mr Big's place: If you make fire in the fireplace, and the damper, known as the flue, is not open, the smoke will fill the room. Calling around town to get opinions on the question, "Would it be good to throw baking soda on it to put it out?" may not be the ideal first response.

People in high places seem to keep less than resourceful company. This does not bode well for certain circles of power in this country. Some of them cannot open doors without breaking door knobs, others cannot operate toilets without breaking them, others can't use a table or wooden tray without disfiguring it, and this latest one can't use a fireplace without wreaking havoc on the interior of the house.

That probably means work for me, but for some reason it is less rewarding when you are basically picking up after people who believe they are above taking responsibility for any of their actions. They are much too important. Apparently being a nitwit is how you assert your importance in that particular network. And they put on the front of being so dedicated to helping the downtrodden. God save the downtrodden if these are their saviors.
A news mannequin referred to the dissenters and mobs in the mideast as "freedom fighters". I'm skeptical but hope he is right. Far too often, what appears to be a righteous revolution pitting those who seek freedom against tyrants ends up being a war between two different tyrannical units. Often it doesn't become evident until it is too late. And often it is not what the rank and file wanted, or they did not really have good definition of what they wanted. I'm not there so I don't know. But I doubt many of them do either. It is very tricky for the vultures not to seize opportunities during these "transitions".
If only Jesse would fly over there with his megaphone.
I still say, "Let what happens in Wisconsin stay in Wisconsin". Outsiders, you probably have your own issues that are screwed up. let your state or city set the example. In my case maybe I can let one tenth of my life get straightened out enough to be an example. No way I could begin to unravel the local official city and country rabble here. If I did have the power the only thing I'd feel confident about is deporting a couple of El Cajon Highway Patrolmen to NYC or somewhere. I'd certainly fire them and give them no pensions or severance pay. And I'd ban them from any position of authority, and not let them own a gun.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Side Effects May Include Death and/or Vomiting

That is one reason I am grateful for my lack of medical access. It is possible that if I were on the right insurance, I'd be encouraged, or even required, to get any number of tests.

Just listen to the fast talker run through the risks associated with meds that half the world takes. Yet they worry about pot and opium. How odd.

It looks like the only medications that I see advertised which have an intriguing sounding side effect would be those that warn of a four hour 'attention' span, as it were. Not something the lone desperado really needs. That is a side effect best shared with your close social circle. No close social circle, no need to seek such things.

I'm fairly certain that the right encounter would result in much the same thing anyway, and without cause for panic. However, if I were to go get a thorough check-up, I would bet that I would be prescribed medication of one kind or another.

It would be a great investigative reporting project. Go to a few different major clinics or professional associations, get the thorough probing, undergo tests, and compare results. I'll bet I'd get all kinds of pills to take, and then more pills to counteract the effects of those. Soon, provided I wanted to have close interactions with my fun close social circle, or portions thereof, I'd desperately need the meds that result in warnings that if the pill actually works for more than four hours, I'm in trouble. That would be to counteract the effects of the other batch of pills.

It is a bit of a dilemma because many things modern health care can do are of great benefit. Artificial joints is one of the good things, as well as many types of surgery, and a few cures for diseases. I, myself, was able to fend off a case of pneumonia without hospitalization many years ago. He gave a bunch of dope, said my plan to fly that day to Miami may be a good plan, and that was that. I was wiped out for quite some time and could hardly breathe or walk at first, but I made the flight, and here I am.

Whatever he gave me produced a great feeling of relief and well being within a few hours. He told me not to think I actually felt better if that happened and go do something stupid. Getting out of 10 degree weather (F) and into Miami sunshine to recover was one of the few smart plans I've executed.

So, the way I see it is that the medical community can either save or improve your life, and it can also screw it up or kill you. Many people become hooked on all things medical and sometimes suffer as a result. They go from health care hobbyists--because they are on some plan which lets them visit doctors a lot--to health care dependents who are less healthy every year. In some cases it may just be a genetic thing, but I think that sometimes getting into that loop did them in.

Most nurses get very mad at me for such views. Not always. I know more nurses than doctors. I'm sure many doctors would also think I am trouble. But how would they know? Thanks to John Edwards and others in the insincere tort business, they are better off if they have covered their legal tracks completely than if you live. You go in and they say you seem ok, go home, and you get sick or die, then John and colleagues might ruin you in court.

Well, I hope those who really need the assistance of good medical people get it without red tape considerations, and others who don't need it try not to tie up the system out of foolish paranoia or lack of other hobby. My avoidance is a public service because it frees up the resources for those who need it right now.

I wonder how many people go into the emergency room with the full mast flag that can't be lowered, due to the pill side effects. That must be an interesting exchange with the admitting nurse. Do you cover it up or just parade around like a lunatic?

I'll bet it is a very rare occurrence. I'd probably not go. Although it would be an exhibitionist's dream ailment and emergency room visit.

Being human is quite a lot of fun. I just don't get the people who hate their own species so much.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Let the 60's Die, Please!

Not sure if I need say more. Of course, I will. A lot more. Skip down to the video if this bores you.

Maybe too many people who lived through it never critically looked at demonstrations close up and talked to participants. Most of them could not tell you any facts. They were there to be seen, be cool, get laid, and get pot. Not necessarily in that order.

Then again, most people did not live through it (late 60's/early 70's protests). They just got their impressions from glamorous looking footage, and hearsay. I am not among that group. Like now, I couldn't justify taking over a building, blocking roadways, etc. However I did go see what was up in case I could score dope or get lucky. And out of curiosity. It amazed me how hateful people could be while "standing up for peace".

**(On the other hand, the reaction of officials did more to fuel things than one might think. Idiotic response by police and government. Agitators knew that and sometimes did things to their own and framed the cops to make the victim part fly. Later reports bring up the possibility that someone other than guardsmen fired the first shots at Kent State. It was still dumb to deal with these things as they did. So sad that in many ways both sides back then actually hated freedom. Both sides wanted everyone to conform to their mode of behavior. Live and let live was not in the mix)

{photo by Robert Altman, I think. I lifted it but not for commercial purposes. Altman is online]
They did not know how to handle large groups of people showing up to express disapproval of undeclared wars.
It was a very strange and confusing period. The art of being hip was far more confining than one might think. However the lack of disease fears and the general sedation of the peer group made for rather friendly interpersonal relations with complete strangers.

***And as much as it goes against my grain in certain ways, I have to say that the draft and the confusion over why it was done did set the stage for the rest. Once you can legitimize your status as victim, it is easy to suspend reason and values in your retaliation. Of course not everyone had a low draft number, like me.

It is curious that some of the most hip protester types of that era that I knew turned out to be the most aggressive and unprincipled of business people later. Peace, love and screw you. Very greedy. It got them laid and gave them a social circle. It was not a truly idealistic movement as much as it appeared****

***Too bad the WWII people couldn't see the forest for the trees. They often resented their kids for not being poor and having to go fight the Huns or Japs. So they went along out of blind patriotism. They should have been the ones to block the unnecessary, and, in my mind, illegal forced conscription of their sons. Though it may be noted that a huge percentage of soldiers in Viet nam volunteered for the service and for that duty. A skewed statistic because enlistees had a better deal than draftees and more control over duty (not saying much)+++++

+++The ultra active peace and love crowd were also the ones who actually harassed and spit on returning soldiers. That was inexcusable. It was all love as long as you dressed like them, looked like them, parroted their language and lingo and thoughts. But step out of that self proclaimed freedom cult, and wrath be upon you. Most rigidly conformist outfit since the military, but less tolerant. That is where I found the movement to be doltish and hypocritical.+++but the draft and war sucked. No way around that.===

No way I support drafting people for non-defensive wars. I hate the whole concept. I am totally opposed to overseas police actions, nation building, and foreign aid, except to maybe help if a meteor falls on a poor place.

But it is all part of the Great Pretense to think that mass demonstrations are not usually (at the very least 90% of the time) organized and fueled by special interests which aren't part of the stated purpose of the marching mob. There are rare exceptions.
Most of the time skilled agitators and organizers appear from out of town, and even bus people in.

It is what I suspect was the case in Egypt as well. That is pretty much all the Wisconsin hooplah has in common with Cairo. To pretend otherwise is, well, it is to pretend. Not to say Egypt did or did not have a ripe climate. They were and are under a police state which makes us look very free. But comparisons do not truly identify the nature of that being compared. They only illustrate degrees. Anyway, WI teachers have little in common with Egyptian mobs, and Wisconsin has very little in common with Egypt.

My view of Wisconsin's issue is that it is their issue. Jesse Jackson or Sarah Palin or Obama coming in to the fray is nothing but demagoguery. I have my running issue with public employee unions, especially if it is a closed shop or close to it. You don't want in, you shouldn't have to join, and you shouldn't have to pay for protection if you opt out. One reason is that, if elected representatives of the taxpayers set terms of employment, and then tax paid employees decide they don't like it and have a union strike and the state is over a barrel because their laws make them deal with the union, then the tax payers are in effect being subjected to taxation without representation.

Further, it is in the interest of a political party to not only promote the public employee union but add more public jobs and increase the size of government because a unionized public employee voting block is very useful. It is a self serving end at the expense of the lower average payed private sector workers, who pay for all this.

The reason so many states and the feds are deeply in debt is that you cannot keep adding functions to government, and tax paid employees without going out of balance. The people paying for the pensions and health care of government workers cannot afford it themselves. There are so many tax paid jobs which ought not exist to begin with, but that's another story. Who would miss the DEA, for example? Not very many normal citizens.

Every time I see marchers and chanters with placards for causes which are rather high class, or unnecessary, it leaves me cold. "I don't like what they are voting on so I am going to repeat after the guy with the megaphone and make a sign that attacks the person who is the figurehead of it all". "Maybe I'll make him look like Hitler. That's always a succinct point in the debate. I'll draw a picture of him being lynched. That's pretty cool." ---I saw signs with both those things in pics of the Wisconsin festival. Many, in fact. But I don't actually think they don't have that right. It is odd that those who support them got so riled when there were Obama-made-into-Hitler posters in protests against his policies. Either we all get the same rights or we don't.

{another aside, How come Jesse showed up and didn't decry their lack of diversity? Bunch of well to do (relative to me) white folks there complaining that the recession may hurt them, too.]

Better yet, why don't we get our friends, kids, babies, and dogs out where people drive with their children, and carry signs with pictures of fetuses and complain about abortion. Never mind that some people do not want to have to explain to their five year old girl what that means. Be sure to line a street which they have to use so they can't avoid you. (still mad about that happening in Greensboro with little K in the back seat all curious. I cut dangerously close to those dolts hanging over the curb)

Oh, but it is all for a good, self righteous cause, and we've been brainwashed into believing that mob action is democracy and the way to deal with everything.

I don't buy it. But I have quit jobs that were abusive. I was in a union and found it useless. If you read the contract, the majority of it only has to do with keeping the union and its administrators fat and powerful. To pretend it is an idealistic fair minded organization there to protect the poor worker (or employee) is generally an erroneous thing to do.

Somehow the whole approach plays into the problem. The government-business partnership model is nothing but corrupt from the get go, and somehow, we've structured life so that the bigger the company, the stronger the plantation mentality. There is enough of the market and nature there to provide a good standard of living, but it is not quite right. Something is way off.

The answer is not forcing everyone to turn over the fruits of their labors to some modern day priests, which politicians have become, to decide how the holy powers think it ought be used. I've not formulated the answer I think best, but I know taking another's property, time or else by force is not it.

So, just about everyone in the picture as promoted in public information outlets is wrong. That is all I can say. The best, most reasonable companies I've known were small companies started by people who could not handle working for a larger bureaucracy, so the saved up, quit, and went into competition. And they thrived. It was only my own problems that caused me to leave those places. The companies were merit based in their internal policies, and treated employees with respect, like adults. No little "write-up" forms, or written reprimands for trivial nonsense. Just did not work that way.

No workers wanted a union to even think of approaching those places. The workers would have done more to chase them away than the management. One place had a union guy working there because it provided a loophole for certain jobs. He'd have done better being non-union, but he was brainwashed. The union told him how to vote in elections and what to think. But he had no desire to go work elsewhere, in a closed shop.

Exactly where the overall system ought to change, in the big picture, I am not sure. There are many small things. The corporate structure changes baffle me most. That feudal culture that permeates all is rather valueless and people violate their own sense of right and wrong all the time to keep even menial jobs.

The argument of "if you don't think this is right then what is?" doesn't change the fact that it is wrong. That is like saying, "If we want to pay the piper we have to steal from Dad's wallet. Oh, you don't like that? Well if we don't get it that way, then how? Ha! you can't answer, therefore the Dad idea is obviously right".

Maybe the little things can be whittled at first. The Big Pretense permeates all. I recall jobs which were best done with the attitude that these were grown people signing on the dotted line. I knew they were in over their head, didn't truly know what they were doing, and that they'd suffer for it. Quite often I found ways to kill the deal. Other times I took the stance that it is not my job to make their choices. They were doing what they did because they thought that is how everyone does. It is a fine line between knowing that the other is going in with their eyes closed, so they are easily deceived by lies of omission, and taking responsibility for the actions of others.

One big mistake was the advent of payment selling, buying everything on time. People came to believe it was normal to buy whatever anyone would finance, whether directly or on a card. No wonder, as a country, (and apparently as a world) we allowed ourselves to go so heavily into debt. We forgot that things have a price and that to trade you have to hold up your end of the bargain. Sometimes it means you get the cheaper car, or keep the old one awhile. Maybe you get by with one less shirt. Maybe you make sandwiches rather than buy them ready made somewhere, etc.

From demonstrations to international "benevolence" to the way schools are run and business is conducted, the Big Pretense has warped all of it, and, in the long run, it is not really as much fun. To dissolve that spell, people have to lose the addiction to self righteous anger and envy, among other things. It is tough, on any level. I get sucked in by it, too. But I am working on it because I know better. The envy aspect and thinking your good fortune equals my bad breaks are not part of my problem though. That seems like a healthy start. I sucker for the dearth of imagination when it comes to recognizing the fact that no matter what, opportunities abound.

No amount of marching, unless a reasonable overthrow is imminent, will address the real issues. Certainly this longing to be in a 60's demonstration won't result in any substantive advancement of freedom and joy.

Talk Radio Call; part 2--dick bass

This is further info on the talk show fiasco described in an earlier post. An anonymous source was able to provide me with the station's security video, and video of me calling which was somehow obtained from the secret black ops people who follow me and record my every move.
I spliced them into one easy to understand movie.
This is an easier way to show what happened than writing a foot long post.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Disjointed Thinking Regarding What Comes To Mind

So, I wake up from this peculiar dream. I'm on a highway, "The 8", I believe. It seems that I am approaching the off ramp. It is kind of overcast and maybe just at dusk. There is an old dark colored car on the shoulder and everything about the vehicle and driver is dark. He waves a cardboard sign out the window that looks dirty and it has circles drawn on it in black yellow and dirty red. I think it had writing in marker that said "Help", or "help me".

He was trying to wave me down. My first reaction was to pull over, which I did. Then I think: he's not getting out. I can't see what or who is in the car, and what's up with the sign if he suddenly needed help? When would he have the time and such to make that, and why does it look like he's had it awhile? I decided it could easily be a set up. I was scheming a way to get to the bottom of it without risk of being hijacked or jumped. That's it. I woke up thinking that this was not a legit opportunity to be of service to my fellow man. At least it was in color and I wasn't a victim. I rarely am; in dream or in life.

I'm still trying to define my aversion to the tactic of demonstrating or marching in the case of the Sunrise Powerlink opposition. That whole thing is rather interesting because it is an example of a situation which most conservative talk people, or others who usually decry abuses by the environmental activists, would automatically assume the opposition is just more anti-human, neo-Luddite rabble rousing. Nothing could be further from the truth.

On the other hand, many of the union types, and more left wing leaning people think the opposition is a roadblock to lovely, renewable green energy. Again, the are miles from the truth.

Many who are involved in the groups opposing this debacle are there because of a self serving agenda to try to get their own preferred, subsidized companies on the map--companies which make solar products and such, but not the sort that would use the powerlink for delivery. Then there are those who think they are the spokespeople for birds and other non-human citizens---the kind who think rats and the earth "need a good lawyer".

I oppose it because it is not needed, because they are putting people off their land, because it is merely there so Sempra can sell energy from their Mexican power plant, and because it will result in higher rates. It is a very shameless scam, and the process is fraught with obvious corruption and avoidance of complying with their own rules.

I won't argue with my friends who will go downtown to do their thing and demonstrate, but I do not have it in me to feel good about joining them. Only because there is something about that method that doesn't feel right in this case. I realize that we've been taught since the sixties, and forever through union activity, that this is the way of freedom and how it is done.

Not having a better plan, I can't offer an alternative. Yet, I know it is there. More than anything, I think the structure of a system which permits such underhanded theft and abuse should be the ultimate target. More often than not such dissent merely focusses on a particular decision rather the whether the powers that be should have the right to even make such a move. That is why we have not become freer and less corrupt, even though group demonstration has been on the rise in the last fifty years.

The only way to truly improve things is to dismantle the institutions and laws that provide the structure for such elitist disregard for individual rights and a freer market.

It bothers me that I cannot be true to myself and please my friends by walking the streets with a crowd to express disapproval. I do not think it will influence the court case. If they somehow impede traffic, or shout at court officials as they enter the courthouse, it will have a negative effect. I do not support those who shout down speakers or get loud and obnoxious to passers by. It doesn't matter whether I agree with their point or not.

No. I guess I won't join the mob in this case--good or bad. There may be a time when I do support a mob that prevents entry to IRS offices or other government tools of tyranny. Not now, and not this.

I have to wonder that so many video games focus on shooting things and people in one way or another. There's a lot of killing and whoopass. Some say this in no way conditions normal people toward violence. I wonder about that.
I know that in sports and music, when I am not in a situation to actually do the activity, I often imagine it and picture the process in my mind. When the actual time comes to perform the task, then I am way ahead of the game and it comes easier. It seems only natural that someone playing virtual kill games would be a little less hesitant to act it out in real life, provided the opportunity arose.

Some of the games appear engaging and fun. Many appear to glamorize anti-social, criminal and needlessly violent behavior. I know that is not the proper view and makes me sound like a Puritan. So be it. Just seems logical. Oh, perhaps we've evolved beyond the stage in which logic is a universal structure for reaching truth. I'm still stuck there. I do not believe that one truth is as good as another just because some claims "his truth" is valid and that logic has no bearing on it.

Just look how easily we've become accustomed to things like views of bombing, shootings, beheadings, etc. For a minute there I think people weren't so numbed to the reality of what those things really are and do. Now it is just another scene from a video game but displayed as news. We're paying for this stuff, and have even provided the hardware for much of it when it looks like we aren't involved. I'm hoping that one day various portions of The Big Pretense dissolve and people refuse to pay.
oh well-I've never been able to get my head around the legitimacy of public employee, paid by tax money, unions either
that could get me shot

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Don't Get Excited Every Time You Hear the Word "Democracy"

Some people sucker for anything if the word "democracy" is attached to it. Minorities, in particular, should be wary of that. Because I do not live in Egypt or any neighboring land, and have no real understanding of the place and culture, I cannot give a valid opinion about their activities at present.

When it is said that the people have made a stand for democracy, and I see reports which tell me they are chanting about democracy, I can't force myself to get excited, jump online to various forums I've seen and tell them, "We in the USA are with you and support your cause!". That is paraphrasing what I saw on a site yesterday.

For one thing, I have no idea what the "people of the USA" think or want--no more than the politicians who claim to know what the American people are thinking or wanting actually have a clue.

I wish everyone in the Arab countries well, but I have no idea what they want. What they mean by democracy is anyone's guess. It's their house, they can run it how they choose.

Here's the danger of democracy, if it is meant that everyone has a vote, and everything can be voted on. Let's say we want all the young women between the ages of 16 and 19 to serve our army by cooking their meals and relieving their tension at night. It is a case in which, by perfect democratic process, a minority is legally oppressed by the majority. Just an example to make the point. There has to be a philosophical consensus regarding the extent of majority power or it becomes a tool of oppression.

Democracy is tyranny if it exists without a very strict system of limits. Even then it is a good idea to make the process of creating laws or policies very cumbersome and difficult. If you've ever dealt with crowds, committees, parliamentary procedure and such, you know how easily the majority can be swayed from opinion A to opinion B and back again. That is one reason I support a bicameral legislature, despite various teachers trying to convince me that the speed and efficiency of a one house system was superior.

Mobs are comprised of people shouting because they can, and because they think there is something in it for them. It is rare that the majority of such a crowd understands the philosophy the demonstration supports, or the one they oppose. It was true in the VietNam protests as well, way back when. Most big mob actions are just that way. Doesn't mean there aren't valid grievances and such, but it is what it is.

That is why, as much as I am opposed to this Powerlink scam in SD county, I cannot bring myself to go to the courthouse with the others and march wherever it is they plan to march. Half the people are opposed for entirely different reasons. There is a portion who get off on such marches regardless of the cause, and there are a good number of very smart sincere people.

Something about the method troubles me. I feel the same about picket lines. Something about it I don't like. I'll just quit the company if I can't get my way, and it means that much to me. Most people will only stand up if they have a crowd and feel safe. Getting arrested under such circumstances is a badge of honor and the peer approval still makes them feel safe.

Anyway. I've done what I can to try to get people to see some issues differently, but so far, I do not see the right situation for joining a crowd on the street. I went to one thing as a favor, and to another to see some things for myself.

Either the hearing begins, or gets ruled on this Friday (I think) so they want to march from some building down to the courthouse. I do not see how this will help the case. I'm fairly certain that many people will immediately have the knee-jerk reaction of assuming it is eco nazis being a pain-again--and decide the other side must be right.

I'm not sure what is the better way, but I am not convinced being in a crowd that is led by the megaphone guy is it.

That strayed from the point about the danger of democracy without some qualifiers. Although, the powerlink issue would not be there were our own representative democracy more strictly limited in the power it gives the state. So, there is a connection.

Looks Like Up To Me

It gets really frustrating.
That's when you have to tell yourself, "Better to try to understand than to try to be understood". You will never be understood.

It helps a little to do that. But sometimes I just want to blast through loudspeakers all around the world, "What planet am I on? Go to hell, you piss me off!!"
Judging from the way things go, They already know that, so they set up the game to mess with me even more. Bastards!

Really very frustrating, and not at all rewarding.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Radio Talk Show Host Review: Rick Roberts is another self serving bastard

OK. Call me stupid. Ask me, "What did you expect?". No problem, because I already beat you to it. I thought I'd see what it was like to call a show since I had a vaguely supportive, but coming from another angle, point.

Rick Roberts (spit grr, vomit) was playing Michele Obama's latest public service ad encouraging parents to lie to their kids to make them run around the house, up and down stairs. He also played her take on the ad in which she had to bring up race and claim that particularly "in the African American community" kids did not have the chance to play sports and join leagues, etc.

That assertion, alone, took me aback. It was my impression that professional and amateur sports are peopled by a disproportionate number of minorities, and that many of the world's very best athletes are Black. Nothing wrong with that, but they could not have got there sitting home getting fat. A huge number of pros were raised in the 'hood. Granted it is a sucky place, but I think obesity is the least of their worries in those locations.

That is actually neither here nor there. I decided to call to put forth the idea that the ever growing tradition of first spouse using public funds to spearhead a pet cause seems like overstepping since they were not elected and it is not the proper job of an elected official's spouse to spend tax money on a personal soapbox. I have thought it for a long time, through Republican and Democratic abuse. It is subtle way of pretending the presidency is a title of nobility--a royal office, therefore the spouse is queen (or king if a woman gets elected).

So, finally Rick, that ego driven phony, gets me on.

Fine, thanks, etc.


Regarding the obesity ads and Michele's comments, I'm sorry she brought race into it. Given that so many professional athletes come from the community she targeted, it is odd for her to imply they have to sit home getting fat--but that is not my point.
It seems a subtle conditioning to view the president and spouse as

What? No way!!
"THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID. HEY JIM YOU THINK ALL BLACK FOLKS SIT HOME GETTING FAT?" [jim being some sort of useful sidekick]
Hey! You know damned well that is not what I said. That is what she implied!! I'm objecting to using tax money...(interrupted again)


And I'm obviously cut from the audibles, so I say You F'ng Idiot and hang up. How'd he decide I'm not Black? Phony bastard.

Now, this guy pretends to be rational, although I do disagree with him much of the time. I have friends who are big fans of his. He does allegedly good charity work--all for charities which bear his name, of course. "Look at me. I am doing so much good, let's all pat me on the back".

He's got an exceptional radio voice but sometimes his corky deep bass seems a bit affected and gets on your nerves. He does well at sounding rational, calm, and authoritative. Not knocking the talent. He's a jerk and not interested in the substance like he claims. (I know I should have known that. I'm terminally naive).

It is abundantly clear that he is willing to pretend to put a racist in his place when no racism was in the mix.

I think tax money ought not be spent for first ladies to carve out a legacy (the point I was attempting to make), and I think Michele was further polarizing the races by telling a lie, pretending that some unknown force has sequestered African American children in their homes due to dangerous neighborhoods. There may be a germ of truth there, but not the whole truth.

Why does she not spearhead a campaign to help the good people in those neighborhoods drive out the gangs and crime? I guess that would require positive action which would not include fueling resentment between races. You can fool people and keep them down if you encourage and play on resentment.

Of course, to clean up inner cities, and many other places, you'd have to rethink the whole DEA war on drugs approach, and that would make it tougher to bust down doors and search without warning, etc. Less excuse to abuse the public. Never fly.

Whatever the case. The people she targeted live in houses with an upstairs, downstairs, and a basement? Wow. I never had such a dwelling. Of course, in Miami, building a basement is not smart--sea level being so close to ground level. But I haven't had such a place in NC or California or Maryland or Tennessee. Some of the states where I resided. Maybe all the states I called home for more than a week or two.

Anyway, it was a low trick to twist my words to make himself look funny and clever, and holier than thou. I was "thou" in that scenario.

He is talking about running for office. Of course it is because so many people are begging him and he feels he loves this country so much he owes it to us to "give back". PUKE!!!!

Now I know what it is like to call a radio show, and one that usually seems less likely to cut a caller off than some. Of course, there are times when he, like others, misses the caller's point altogether. He rarely sees a point beyond his own preconception, even if he doesn't know much about it.

I swear, I was concise, articulate, and did not do that halting slow speech thing that often plagues me and makes people think I am stupid. I was on my game. There are many shows I'd never call because the host never shuts up long enough to engage the point. Apparently Rick Roberts is not the exception he pretends to be. Maybe he was once. Now that his ego is big enough to seek public office he has gone to the dark side.

Whatever the case, it was a cheap shot which I did not appreciate. I guess if I had started by kissing up like callers often do, then went into nitpicking Obama this and Obama that he'd have behaved. My gripe is more that we pay for those stupid ads and the whole "national diet conversation" than with whatever is said. Belaboring their points and faults just gives validity to the system being abused to provide them the platform.

I consider it an insult that government is involving itself in "the obesity epidemic". Our debt is bigger than the entire economy. Is this stuff necessary? Don't trust that the radio people aren't a perverted part of the entire boondoggle. Like everyone else, if it makes them money and gives a feeling of power, they are happy not to change a damned thing.

So, they'll kill any point that would truly promote freedom, while they promote the idea that sticking with the two big parties will ever yield a true change. They are a part of the Big Pretense. Shocking, I know, but without Obama, Clinton, and someone like Bush doing pretty much the same things, these guys are out of business. Not that I support any government effort to control them. I do not.

The big war between democrat and republican is a show, as far as substantive philosophy goes. Useful idiots in Hollywood manage to demonize republicans in a stereotypical way, but in action they are not effectively different than the dems. It sucks. I wish they were because I am one who believes in very few laws, very simple controls, and extremely limited government. And that certainly is not the democratic party. I don't agree with personal attack on some levels. Talk show hosts and Chris Matthews are fair game.

I will certainly never vote for Rick Roberts. He showed his stripes. I'll vote for a third party if his opponent is also an ego bound power hound.

Now that I've done it, I will not call any show again. Unless, of course, I have an alien encounter or similar experience. Then I'd call George Noory. I still trust him.

Happy Dumbass Holiday for Sheep

If you are in a good committed relationship, or good marriage, do you really have to be told once a year how and when to be appreciative and romantic?

If you don't know what you want, aren't in a specifically committed relationship, do you need a ridiculous commercial holiday to force you to either lie, which may falsely lead people on, or do nothing, which then hurts feelings? Lose/lose.

Unless others, who may be potential targets of your lies, refuse to sucker for the manufactured, peer-pressure-foisted-upon-the-public-by-those-who-sell you diamonds, flowers, chocolate, cards, and overpriced dinners, holiday, you will end up disappointing people. Especially if you do not go the lying route. But then, even if you do play along and lie, you are buying trouble.

Trumped up days of recognition and appreciation are an aberration of modern civilization. It is a subtle attack on nature and the free market as it exists in nature. If you are worthy of appreciation, you usually know it. If your kids show no appreciation of you without the stupid Mother's or Father's day obligatory observance, then either your kids are ingrates and lack something in their upbringing, or you are a pain of a parent undeserving of kudos, or you simply gave birth to a defective unit and it is not your fault.

The trumped up days only allow sociopaths, psychopaths, and other emotional phonies to hone their skills. Sincerity cannot be forced anymore than affection. These days bring up a disgusting mix of guilt driven pretense and confused conformity in all but the few who actually feel like showing the affection and appreciation anyway, and have the time and money to play the game happily on the assigned day.

Those few have no need to be told.

Maybe this is why I am not attached. Of course, some people are not alone solely for that reason--can't be alone, so they partner with first willing candidate. They in no way like their significant other; certainly do not love it/him/her. I'm unable to commit if I don't believe it, and if I am not sure being with me is the best thing for the crazy woman. Although I have resolved to learn not give a damn if it is any benefit for the other or not.

These guilt trips put out in ads are not good. That is the way charities and government agencies sell themselves, too. As if it is your fault that little Jimmy has perfuddledipophobiaginitis and lives in squalor in a remote corner of Uganda and drinks dirty water. It is nice to help people out. But the tone and usual implication that it is your fault when someone starves or dies of AIDS in a remote land, or even across town, is garbage. It is highly unlikely that it is your fault, and if it is, you already know it.

The fear of not going along with the crowd, of being weird- of being judged cold, heartless, and a misfit-is a tool used to manipulate people. It is a tactic so effective that people can be manipulated to actually cooperate with their own destruction in subtle (and not so subtle) ways.

So, Happy Spend Money and Get Lucky Day. (As if spending money wouldn't bring that kind of luck anyway). Shhh. We are supposed to pretend that is not the case.
Just like we should pretend that looks have no influence on our mating choices.

Another Movie

The Rage in Placid Lake, an Aussie film--independent, I guess--was another HULU offering. A pretty good flick about misfits and strange parents.

I'd see it.

Oh. I did.

I like the science chick. She was the coolest of people.

At the very start, I didn't know what was up. Very quickly my fears were put aside.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Hulu movie review: White on Rice

This odd movie is about Japanese Americans, with a Korean or two thrown in. Most of the people were sane and good looking.
That is everyone except Uncle Jimmy. He was Japanese and I think they should have shot him and dumped him in the river at the start.

It is one of those films about the errant but lovable incompetent divorced uncle. Only in the case of Jimmy, lovable does not apply. What a stupid, selfish moron. It was painful because the other characters were somewhat likable.

I admit to that stereotypical view that Asians are brighter than that, and less tolerant of complete jerks who freeload. They were overly tolerant of this dimwit. Maybe they were trying to smash some of the typical assumptions by not only having a complete moron in the mix but also putting up with his self pity and projected guilt. I wanted to tell the family in the movie that it is OK to kick him out and beat him mercilessly, since they appeared unwilling to do the world a favor and just waste him.

Maybe they could have thrown him in the ocean. I'm not sure where they were. I know one girl was from Southern California, so it was out this way somewhere.

Then I started thinking, "Oh my God, I'm the divorced deadbeat uncle in my family". I hate that. No way I am like Jimmy and torture my relatives with my unwelcome presence. I have generally lived far away from family most of my life. At first it was because they made me feel like jumping in front of a speeding bus on a regular basis. Then it was because I felt ashamed of my lack of something; money, accomplishment, ability not to be how I am.

Even though I am no Jimmy, this movie caused me to think I had more in common with the useless dimwit than with the people who seemed to have it together. That made me angry and sad and angry.

Don't see this movie. It will only piss you off or bore you.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Almost Heaven..

.or one of those places. I'm not sure what was up. Almost bought the farm. I guess I was doing something besides driving. These roads near me have bluffs on one side, drop off the edge on the other. No nice shoulder at all on many stretches.

And I was on just such a stretch when I looked up to see I was already off and heading toward an outcropping in the bluffs, and a very nasty bunch of holes or craters in the bit of shoulder. There is not even space to pull over so if you are partly off the road, you messed up.

I swerved left to avoid collision and hopefully not let the wheel be swallowed by the crazy, craggy dip. It caught part of it and when the wheel made it out the car went waay left. Good thing no one was coming the other way. Had I been in one of the old Jeeps it would have rolled. I got back on the right line without further over-control issues. I'm not sure I had a choice about swing to the left lane. I needed a radical change of angle to best avoid bigger trouble.

Unfortunately this car has wheel covers which I hate. I need to get the steel spoke wheels. I don't want the fancy alloys. I like the basic steel with four or five spoke things. Simple and less easy to ruin. My old car had those and I meant to switch them off to this car, but by the time I figured out how, I would have to go to some border town and bring jack stands, jacks, etc. and do it myself so I put it off and forgot. Dumb choice.

The stupid wheel covers are there but a bit the worse for wear. What really troubles me is that this is what you are supposed to do drunk, and I'm not drunk. Another milli second and it could have been nasty. That was the kind of terrain that can cause a flip, a dead stop into the side of a cliff, or worse. And I could have careened into an oncoming car or truck. I was lucky.

Actually I was amazed that I was able to get it back on the road at all. I thought it was too late and no way I could miss that ugly dip.

It is not usual that I am that careless and distracted. I hardly ever answer the phone while driving. If I do I slide it open to speaker and leave it on the passenger seat. So, it wasn't phone foolishness.

I think it was because I was on the way to do some work and I was preoccupied with the blues. I'm pretty sure I will one day not be so lucky, and that will be that. Hopefully I can get something worthwhile done before then. I'd hate to leave a useless mess behind.

I'll pay better attention from now on. It was a close one and quite surprising.

Friday, February 11, 2011

Thank you song

Now I'm a guitar man. Like my new ax? Even has valley girl comments from the wang bar.

And another from back in a previous life at the King Biscuit fest. I like this one because the videographer didn't aim the cam too much at the pavement or port-o-lets on this one. I do remember I was just getting over a cold or the flu and felt less articulate than usual but I had fun that day. Articulate works best on a blues harp. I also like ths because a couple of photographers took my picture. That makes you feel important even if they usually get 86'd.

Thursday, February 10, 2011


Strange color, blue.

Blue skies= good

Got the blues = sad

Blue {things I won't mention] = somewhat frustrating but fun getting there, in a perverse sort of way.

Blue is considered a cool color and some shades are soothing.

It seems like a hue full of contradictions.

The End

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Wax and Wane is an Uncomfortable Lifestyle

That does it. I'm certain that there is a pattern here; up and optimistic followed by lost and sure the walls will crash in at any second. Knowing it is all internally generated helps not take it too seriously, but it doesn't prevent the problem of getting nothing done or not knowing where to start.

This routine truly sucks, I tell you. Maybe massive doses of omega 3 in some form would help. No doubt it is due to too many blows to the head from an early age. Or maybe it is just what happens when one is not smart enough to know better.

What kind of idiot can turn Paradise into a prison? You are not allowed to answer "Janet Nepolitano", or similar thing. This is all speaking in terms of the personal small picture.

Another added note; Never ever get your hair cut by anyone in Alpine. I gave it another shot at another untried hair cut place. This one seemed like it might work out. It was run by women and I thought would at least be better than the biker who has never had a haircut himself. NO.

That makes maybe four attempts to find a decent haircutter in this small town. We are talking really bad. I could have given any of my friends a pair of scissors and come out better.

Vain, you may say. Possibly. But it is clear that the ony safe bet is to pay more money and go to Notorious for Hair in Point Loma. I don't care if hardly any men ever go there. I'd rather pay the money, have nice smart aleck chicks do the job, and come out not feeling like Moe in the Three Stooges.

I may let it grow this time for a year. Being grateful to still have plenty of hair at this age, why not?
It was my hope to help the failing businesses in Alpine. Apparently I am only enabling gross incompetence.

What's even more stupid is that I usually leave saying, "That's great, thanks a lot". In my defense it is partly because I can't tell what they've done at that point. I discovered so many stray strands of wrong length that I used my sharp kitchen knife to even it up slightly. (couldn't find my scissors)

Maybe I should wait until my mood chemistry is on the upswing before I make any decisions like get a haircut, fix the car, etc. When I'm down I make irrational and poor choices. That is why it is so hard to get the needed things done. I either forget what they are, mix up the priorities or get them done in an unacceptable fashion.

It is probably a more painful existence than it should be, and more of an agony than it sounds. I'll bet it is possible for it to be much better.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

No Wonder Half of America is Drunk and the Rest on Drugs

OK, that is a stretch. I think half plus the rest equals everyone. There should be some allowance for those who are not drunk or on drugs. That probably covers a good 2% of the population. Most likely they are the most frustrated group, and the group least likely to hold public office or do anything which requires a lot of reading of government documents or listening to those who create them those who shuffle them.

Believe it or not, I actually have an uncommonly high reading retention ability. I do very well when it comes to reading something and catching the details, and recalling the details. I believe the truth of this is recorded somewhere on my Permanent Record, or in the Library of Congress. However, when it comes to government documents my brain fries.

That is how it is. I cannot stand reading any government document, sign, letter, nothing. Almost always, I either can't make sense of it, or the tone irritates me to the point where I dive into an irrational frenzy. This results in a poor reading experience and one not characterized by good recall of the material.

Part of the jury summons siad you could do the deed two weeks ahead of time or after. However, another part says if you don't show on the exact day that you have to contact them and reschedule, and to reschedule you have to pick a day not less than six weeks in the future and not more than six months in the future. What is the 2 weeks thing about? I have no idea and am unwilling to continue my path into the bowels of government rules and language to figure it out.

I'm cutting my losses. I called and talked to the nice machine lady, since the office people are only there from 9:52 AM until 3:25 PM. I did not make that up--9:52. It is on the machine that talks to you when you call.

It is one of those systems which asks you to say "yes", "Jury duty", "postponement", among other things. Then she says, "Let me see if I have this right; you said 'yada yada yada..' Is that correct?". Then you say yes or no and she says, "Did you answer yes?"

It took me less than an hour and fewer than ten times to the main menu to reschedule. I was not home and had no calendar, so I had to guess at a day six weeks from now which fell on whatever weekdays she said were acceptable. After a few tries I ended up being rescheduled for March 29th. I see now, looking at my icalendar on my ilaptop that March 29th is a Tuesday.

As much as I wanted to get this out of the way, I think I will just hope I don't have some big important thing going in late March. That talk of the two week option still bugs me, but I could tell when I re-read the jury letter today that I have not outgrown my complete abhorrence for the way government offices communicate with those they (erroneously) allegedly serve.

I was thinking, it is far easier to handle that world drunk or on drugs. It certainly was easier for me back when I was in circumstances run by nearby bureaucrats and things governmental. Another of life's little tricks. If I'd kept up my habits, I could accept these things with a more numb emotional aspect, but I'd have ended up under their care in some sort of institution, providing I survived. Then I'd have been stuck in the belly of the beast full time.

Yea. I think cutting my losses and leaving it the way Machine Lady negotiated things is the best move. She's probably as close to the A team as I'll find.

Disorderly Sleep

It has been a thing of concern ever since I was in my early twenties. They even confined me to a sleep lab for a night one time. I gave up on testing soon after, so never went back.

Neurological things often don't fit into neat categories. You be surprised how little they know in many respects regarding brain function. Even the drugs prescribed are often not understood. They theorize regarding the mechanics of how they work, but half the stuff was designed for one thing then it was discovered they work well for some other symptom.

In my case they concluded it was some form of narcolepsy but not the classic type which makes you fall asleep in the middle of a game of pool or standing there talking to someone. It just sometimes happens so that I'd hit a strange kind of sleep at last minute and blow through alarm clocks by two to four hours, regardless of how long I'd been asleep already.

We went the ritalin deal on and off for years. The off part was because I got tired of it and felt almost like I developed and immunity to it. So, I'd lay off for maybe a year. I eventually lost contact with any doctor who knew the story so I had no source of it. It would be good once in awhile, but overall I'd rather just compensate some other way. Nothing is with some side effect.

When I was working a job that often required being there at 5 AM, sometimes earlier, I spent all night drinking water. A big glass before going to sleep so every couple of hours it was up to pee, then drink more. That has been the only really reliable method I found. No combination of alarm clocks and bright lights on timers ever proved dependable. You just never know.

Lately it hasn't been critical most of the time, and I have gone long stretches waking up with the sun. But more recently that has changed around a bit and the sleep thing is all over the map. I must not have drank enough water because I overshot the time I needed to be up to make jury duty. I'll try again tomorrow.

It gets old--trying to fit. The trick is to avoid letting the things that are tough to change or unchangeable, induce a reaction which becomes spiraling depression. Much of life is a series of subtle and not so subtle compensations. People tend to move away from their weaknesses whether they think about it or not. If you have a sore knee, you tend to take up the slack by letting the other one carry the load. It works in all kinds of ways. You can't add well in your head, yu do math on a calculater, your phone, whatever. That is compensating.

The trap is when you think you should be able to do a thing, or ought to do it a certain way that is not natural to you and you force yourself to do it the hard way. I have done a bunch of that. That's the kind of thing that makes you crazy. It is not so easy to sort out because life naturally demands doing a lot of things you don't want to do, but you have to. And most of the time you are glad you did whatever it is. Separating that from the directions which are simply not a fit is what separates the happy and successful from the riffraff like me.

At least I no longer wake up cursing and screaming at myself when I miss the mark. I spent many years letting the frustration turn into intense self hatred and rage. That is where the testing helped. Finally someone convinced me they could document the fact that it wasn't because I am stupid and weak. The tests covered a lot territory beyond a sleep lab because some other things going on were interrelated.

Fortunately the jury duty allows turning up any day within a two week window. Otherwise I would have to throw myself on the mercy of the court. Not the sort of mercy I would want to depend on.

Welcome to the fog where I dwell.

Monday, February 7, 2011

Mysteries from Somewhere Other

After seeing Interstate 60, the movie, I am wondering what this I-59 situation is. As far as I know there is no I-60.
Maybe no I-59

It would have to be a north-south thoroughfare.

Also, I am not sure who sent this. I have an idea, but I could be wrong.

So, this could mean I am being drawn to a mystic highway by a ghost or other force from another dimension.

When you live as I do, you seek drama wherever there is a drop or two to be squeezed out.

Cool card, don't you think? I thought so.

I guess it doesn't matter where it comes from, as long as it isn't like getting a horse's head. Don't they do that when the mob is going to waste you?

See, the drama thing again. Oh good my life is getting interesting; they've put a contract out on me. You know you need to step up the game when you find yourself thinking like that.

Saturday, February 5, 2011 Movie Review; volume 60 and 61

Interstate 60 is a movie I liked.
They did not call it The Sixty. Nope, it was "interstate sixty".
That was not the only reason I liked it.
It was funny, surreal, silly, and kind of magical. Overall, enjoyable and uplifting.

That's it.

Also the surfing documentary "Bustin' Down the Door" is very good. And it is the real deal.
This tells the tale of how surfing became a professional sport with some money attached.
The Aussies and South Africans hit Hawaii and surfing would never be the same. They tended to rub the locals the wrong way, but their realization that they had to be brash to get noticed, and crazy good surfers to back it up eventually paid off.
It is the sort of documentary that holds my interest.
Bitchin flick

Time Flies

So, I had a birthday.
Usually I try to keep it low key and am fine with it if no one notices or says a word. This year I was not sure I was prepared to face my reality. Old and not famous or rich or even a minor patriarch. Boo hoo.

Then it dawned on me: it is simply not in my organic being to grow up. I can be responsible and not childish as far as petty jealousy and such, but the air of the grown up and the restrictions that carries are foreign to my being. Most of my difficulties in life have come from trying to fight that truth.

Maybe now I will no longer attempt to fit a mold that will never work.

We had practice last night and the band surprised me with cake, decorations, a 2 disc set of Bob Marley's last concert, recorded live, parrot coffee, and a toy guitar that looks like it ought to be from the Barbi collection.
A pink guitar with that wang bar or whatever it is called. It has buttons on the neck that play notes, and it plays some prerecorded songs. When you hit the bar a valley girl says things like, "Rock on!" and "Whatever!".
My favorite is when she says "whatever".
So I am now a guitar god with my mini Barbi Strat.

When friends go to such trouble for you and manage to make you laugh like that, it is hard not to feel pretty good and forget the complaints about how you could have been a contender. Maybe I am where I ought to be, and not so far off of who I am supposed to be.

Considering that I expected a sudden death many many years ago from the consequences of driving cars upside down, and hanging in areas where people like to shoot guns, this is all gravy.

Last night was a great time and I thoroughly enjoyed feeling special. I marvel at the trouble people sometimes go to in order to let others know they are OK and mean something. Despite anything else that goes on, there is a lot of good in the human race.

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Ballistic Mountain, CA, United States
Like spring on a summer's day


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