Friday, May 25, 2012

Lunaphobic Much?

I'm very disappointed that the senate voted to remove the word "lunatic" from all federal code. This probably means that you get no minority points and special status for being a lunatic.

Lunatics have been disenfranchised. The only hope for lunatics is if, like me, they also belong to other special groups. In my case, I can claim to be almost any minority other than woman--who technically are the majority--but never mind that. It pays to be in officially protected groups. We are all equal, but some are more equal. Hate crime laws tend to favor some over others.

Be sure to claim the right group or groups. That way people get punished more if they shoot you because they don't like your group. I'll RIP a whole lot better knowing that my assassin was motivated because of my Cherokee/Hispanic/African (proved by high cheek bones and gum pigment) heritage rather than because of my personality. Thank God for high cheek bones, and alleged family lore.

They stopped short of banning lunatics from federal office. It is sort of a pretend situation. We won't say "lunatic" no matter what happens, or who is speaking. If they banned lunatics from office, as well as printed word, the Capitol building would be a ghost town.

Like that guy from Georgia who was quizzing a general in a congressional hearing regarding moving troops to Guam. I forget why. This representative's concern wasn't to do with why. He was worried that adding so many people to the US base side of the island would "cause it to capsize".

That is right. An elected United States lawmaker feared that an island would capsize if too many people set foot on the military base. Flip that baby right over, spilling innocent civilians into the ocean, many of whom may not know how to swim.

We do not call such an elected official "lunatic", and certainly not "retarded". In politically incorrect truth, though, I fear he may be both. I guess he's in the right place; more insanity in DC than there is in Georgia. California gives them a run for the money, but that's off topic, sort of.

He wasn't joking. In this case you must be careful with pointing out that the man is a mental midget or people will accuse you of hating midgets. How to call someone in public office what they are in terms of philosophy, actions, and idiocy without violating the CODE, I don't know.

So, no more reference to "lunatic" in federal gibberish. We'll continue to use euphemisms like "bureaucrat", "congressman/woman", "senator", "president", "vice president", "czar", "secretary of (fill in the blank)", and on and on.

But we know you could just as easily say things like, "Lunatic In Chief", "lunatic of the Interior", "White House Press Lunatic", etc. and it would be fitting enough, even if not adherent to the Code of political correctness, which is ever evolving.

Somehow these lunatics think that by refusing to legally acknowledge the Lunatic community that they will reap benefit. Maybe they are planning on forcing people into the military or into some kind of community work. They always manage to protect themselves from the requirements they place on others.

I'll bet if they reinstate the draft, being a lunatic will no longer get you a deferment. That is where gays screwed up. If a draft comes back, they are going to wish they'd never pushed to be in the thick of war. Personally, I think they were duped, but that is their choice.

Now how are you going to avoid an insane draft? Claiming you are Cherokee won't help. It will no longer help to claim that you are gay. Equality of enslavement, and people pushed for it. I guess they forgot what a dark cloud that was, and what a political mess they made of that "police action".

It is a sad day when the feds pretend the lunatic community doesn't even exist. We deserve better. After all the fun and excitement we've brought to the world, to be treated like this is an outrage. I am calling for Lunatic Pride marches, nationwide, on my birthday in February, and/or on my invisible friend's birthday, next Friday.

Since gays stole the rainbow--which I still think should be public domain, no agenda or dogma attached--I guess we'll need some other kind of flag. I think that one with the crescent moon is fitting and attractive. We'll just lift it from the Islamic world. If the rainbow can be hijacked, so can the moon. Again, it is not p.c. to say so, but I guess using the flag for the lunatic community, at large, is really just broadening the hardcore base who already use it.

Lunacy is more rampant than one might think. For once this symbol can used by garden variety lunatics who rarely blow themselves or others to smithereens. A new political force is born.

It would seem we are now the victims of a lunaphobic Congress. Lunaphobia is the stuff of hate crimes. If a person attacks me for being crazy and doesn't get more stringent punishment than if he/she/it attacked me just for fun, I am going to be one angry lunatic.

Seriously, that would drive me mad.

PS: it is a grievous thing that we don't have any one word to replace the universal "he" pronoun. Alternating by sometimes using he and sometimes using she does not seem to convey the same universality that the, understood, non gender specific he did.

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